Want to join the Tea Party? Tea Party Application Form

1. Name

2. Address

3. Race

4. Religion

5. What is the only television channel where you get your news and information from?
A.

6. Contrary to all "facts" and "reality", do you believe that Obama will raise your taxes, take your guns, and enact the fairness doctrine?
A. Yes
B. No

7. Do you believe that corporations and the wealthy protect us all, give us shelter and food, and we owe everything we have, including our lives, to them?
A. Yes
B. No

8. Glenn Beck, Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Michelle Malkin, Sarah Palin, Joe the Plumber, Pat Robertson, and Michael Savage are...
A. Who?
B. Full of hot air
C. Pundits
D. Enlightened and infallible wisemen who are automatically irrefutable experts in whatever they talk about

9. Do you think that Obama gave bailouts to the banks?
A. Yes
B. No
9A. If no, then why do you think this, you hippie?

10. Please write a short paragraph about what you think of Obama (If you are unable to use the words "Socialist", "Marxist", "Nazi", "Communist", "Hitler", "Muslim", then we are sorry, but we do not think that the Tea Party will be a very good fit for you.)

As a followup, you could ask, "Are you willing to have them squeeze you for every last dime you have so as to fatten their coffers?" Seems to be a Tea Party must.

Another might be, "Do you pledge to remain a committed Republican, as you have always been?"

3. Race (check one): ___White ___Inferior

4. Religion (check one): ___Christian ___Heathen