Are you okay?

Are you getting enough to eat these days? Do you need to see a doctor? How is your health?

Are you among friends and family, or are you alone? Are you lonely? Do you need a friend to talk to?

Do you just need someone to listen?

Do you still have a home? A roof over your head? Are your bills paid? Do you have money in your pocket?

No one asks these questions. We've just gotten so mean and divided of late, it hurts my spirit and it makes me yearn for kindness.

So I'm asking, how are you? Can I do anything to help?

Great idea.

You ok?

I'm dong alright, could be better. Pretty borke right now, but I got a roof over my head and food to eat, so all in all, I'm okay today.

I do hope you're well.

but yeah, gettin' by. And we have tons more than some - I'm sure you know what I mean.

Hang in there, it's a big boat.

"Can I do anything to help?"

Can you pay my mortgage?



Thanks for your concern!

:toast:

Man, if I could pay your mortgage I would!

I am really glad you're having a great summer!

:toast:

Not that it does any good, but I happy to ask.

:pals:

:pals:

:pals:

I still can't get health insurance, I still have a busted bone in my neck that's giving me hell because I can't afford to get the damned thing glued back together, but I can see a doc if I need antibiotics or a refill of one of my (cheap) prescriptions, so I guess I'm doing OK.

Just thanks for asking. That helps a lot, believe it or not.

Now how are you managing these days? It's tough out there for all of us.

Funny thing is, I feel a little better every time someone asks, and it's nice just to be able to give an honest answer.

Sorry about the neck thing. I should feel more grateful for my health. I've got this great system, I never go to the doctor, so if there is something wrong, I'm blissfully ignorant.

I sincerely hope things a good for you again.

a union job. I'll be retiring with a good pension and health, dental and vision insurance that will cost me $120.00 a month.I mourn the loss of union jobs and truly feel sorry for what the anti union backlash has done to this country. Yeah, I'm doing good.

Thank God for the Unions. I only wish more people had your story.

Thanks for checking in.

haven't quite wrapped my head around it.

That's what makes them adventures. I do wish you and yours well.

I may have to tape that to my refrigerator door. Very well put, and poetic. If Virg Bernero wins the democratic primary here in Michigan, my first adventure will be working my butt off to get him elected. Thank you truly for your kind words.

Use the quote in good health.

Some people have their entire identity wrapped up in their career and those are the people who run into serious trouble after they retire.

We call them the Fox "News" base.

I'd have started when I was about 15! Seriously, I love it. I may not be able to do everything I want, but I have everything I need (and a few pounds I don't!LOL!). I'm happier now than I ever was working. Congrats and enjoy!:party: :toast:

I wish I could retire one day but Im part of the 401K generation (we go to museums next to dinosaurs to find out what pensions are). Speaking of my mortgage up thread, you ought to go retire in a nice beach community and buy my home.

able to afford a beach community. I'll actually be living on a little more than half of what I made yearly as a worker.But good luck in selling your home, I assume beach property hasn't lost it's value like some other communities have.

"I assume beach property hasn't lost it's value like some other communities have"

Yeah yeah.

"Buy next to water"

"Buy a view"

"Prices will never go down"

Id have more money now if I rented instead of ever bought. And Ill never get a decent price for it.

When the uppity middle-class no longer feels like they can afford small vacation homes, it doesn't matter how isolated your little market is. No real estate market is in a bubble (besides Mendocino County and Nelson BC). Ive learned not to believe what a realtor ever says again, and always do your own leg work

Hey...you gotta roll with the punches though. Im still enjoying life. :)

of heaven.

Im renting the bitch out and getting out of town. :)

Im not going to let a home anchor me down in the states. I may not be able to retire like you, but Im going to attempt to make my youth like a vacation

it while you can. :-)

I'm with you on the quality union jobs. Enjoy your retirement.

Take your time and ease into it. Wake up when you feel like it and sleep when you want to. If you get bored at times or restless don't sweat it. It passes. I woke up this morning and all I could think about was how happy I am to not be working. Good luck!

But thanks for asking.

Not that knowing that fact makes the cruise any more pleasant.

Remember, you guys have each other.

I'm not sure how to stretch my current resources to October 1st, which is when I next get paid, and I can't afford to see a doctor for a couple of issues, despite my insurance; premiums are paid, but nothing left for deductibles and copays. I've been getting by without care for some years now, though, so hopefully can push that envelope a few years further.

I'm concerned about not being ready to head into winter.

But today, I'm okay.

Most people around my neck of the woods are without work and scraping to get what they can.

If talking about your situation helps at all, I'm happy to do what I can.

Talking doesn't really help, at this point, but knowing that I can does.

Too many people everywhere are making it on a day-to-day basis.

Are you okay? - That depends on your definition. I need to get back to work, but on the whole 'yes'.

Are you getting enough to eat these days? I'm trying a 'paleo diet' so 'kinda'.

Do you need to see a doctor? Actually I do, but it's nothing major.

How is your health? Except for a minor bacterial infection I caught from an old girlfriend, good.

Are you among friends and family, or are you alone? I am alone.

Are you lonely? No. I am 'broken' emotionally and I am just fine being alone. ('Dexter' and I share a lot of common ground emotionally)

Do you need a friend to talk to? No.

Do you just need someone to listen? No.

Do you still have a home? I lost my home to foreclosure.

A roof over your head? Yes.

Are your bills paid? For now, but problems are coming if I don't get back to work.

Do you have money in your pocket? Yes.

No one asks these questions. We've just gotten so mean and divided of late, it hurts my spirit and it makes me yearn for kindness.

So I'm asking, how are you? I'm ok.

Can I do anything to help? Only if you have an 'in' with high voltage utility contractors.

Thanks for asking. You?

Pretty damned depressed the last couple of days, which is a new thing for me and I can't quite figure out how to work my way out of it. I thought asking other people how they are doing might help.

I understand emotionally broken, and your sentence my have helped me at least diagnose what my problem is today.

On the topic of high voltage utility contractors, not so much, but I wish you luck.

Thanks for just being a person with me for a while, I'm finding it helps.

I'm happy to help any way I can.

Are you getting enough to eat these days? It's summer and it's hot and I have little appetite, so yes. Get back to me in January though. :)

Do you need to see a doctor? Yes, and I'll be seeing them a lot next month.

How is your health? Good, except for the cancer part and torn rotator cuff part (here's a tip: don't fall down stairs).

Are you among friends and family, or are you alone? I am alone, thank Christ.

Are you lonely? Not at all.

Do you need a friend to talk to? Nope

Do you just need someone to listen? Nope

Do you still have a home? Such as it is.

A roof over your head? Literally feet over my head.

Are your bills paid? Well, I do still owe that student loan thingy....

Do you have money in your pocket? Yes, $7.

So I'm asking, how are you? I'm feeling groovy.

Can I do anything to help? Nope, but it's very cool of you to ask. :toast:

Know that you bring smiles and giggles to a lot of people here.

I value your truth.

I feel your pain. I had 2 of them, but was fortunate enough not to need surgery. Physical therapy took care of the pain and loss of motion, but I still have to be careful about how much I can lift.

But a month later I still have mucho pain throughout my shoulder (not to mention the other 2 tears on the bicep). I still can't do much with it, and lifting even a gallon of milk is an adventure.

It got me out of helping someone move though, so it hasn't been all bad. ;)

:pals:

I could use a hug.

How about you?

:hug:

I use to see this sign on the freeway in the late 80s. It said: "Hugs, not drugs."

I always had to ask, why can't we just have both?

You are a very nice person for checking in with a hug, here's one back...:hug:

Please accept my best wishes for a good day today.

And a good day tomorrow.

And a good day after that.

Repeat as often as necessary.

The family hasn't been messed up economically for forty years and it's 24/7 scary. Mom's processing is slipping noticeably. The writing is going pretty well. All the cats have fleas.

Thanks for asking, rocky. :pals:

I consider you, and others here, friends.

Cats and fleas, like peanut butter and jelly. They just go together.

Good to know on the writing. I can't manage to put my butt in the chair these days.

:grouphug: I am ok, considering the state of the world.

Are you ok?

I could really use a job, and a new set of teeth, but yeah, I'm doing better now then when I started this thread.

I'm glad you're doing okay.

:hug:

Of course we're together via the intertubes, but we'll be together never the less.

Hang in there friend!:hug:

This is the nicest thread I've seen here in a long time. It's wonderful to see a little kindness. Thanks, asdjrocky.

I just woke up this morning feeling so damned sad. It helps to ask other people how they are doing.

great kids, two homes, 3 cars and a custom harley. my 401k is fully funded, my real estate investments are gain equity every year, and I am healthy as a horse.
Life is good! thanks for asking

My retired Mom hasn't had a social security raise in several years while all her costs of living are going up. Next spring we will be either selling or renting out her house (depends on how shitty the real estate market is at the time) and she is going to have to move in with me to save money. My own small business is all but dead in the water due to the shitty economy, and the company I work for has been slowly drowning for the past several years -- we will be lucky to make it another 12 months. I would love to change jobs but this job allows me incredible flexibility of time off I could not get anywhere else so I can take care of my aging and frequently ill Mom.

I live paycheck to paycheck, have no savings, no retirement, and somedays I do without meals to save money. I have sometimes had only $10 for food to last a week until the next paycheck.

I thankfully have health insurance, though any type of real illness would do me in financially. I have no dental/vision and have been unable to save the $$$ to get to the local dental college for some long overdue and much needed care.

What small amount of family I have is well aware of the challanges facing my Mom and have doen zero to step in and help, so I have resigned myself to handling this on my own. And boy, does it make me resentful.

But, I come from tough farm stock who survived the Great Depression and I will survive this.

Thanks for taking the time to ask. :hi:

What can you do to help me? Give your time, energy, and money to Progressive/Liberal candidates (the real ones, not the faux Will Marshall kind) who want the US to be a better, more supportive place for people like me and my Mom. :hug:

Thanks for really taking the time to let me know how you are.

My thoughts are with you and your mother, and just reading your words gives me a good clue to your strength and your stock.

If it's any help, you're not alone.

Actually, that just makes me more pissed off! :D To live in a country such as the United States of America and for so many to be to be faced with such circumstances and much worse is really a crime in my book. I know people who have lost their homes, their jobs, essentually everything. All this while Wall Street and the uber rich rake in the $$$.

Sadly, the rot is deep and entrenched in our country and our politics.

And thank you for your kind words and thoughts. :hi:

paycheck and health insurance part, lol. I moved into my dad's house to take care of him after my mom died six years ago. At the time they said he was at death's door himself and I "should be prepared." A year later he was so sick that I had to stop working to take care of him, it was all he could do just to make it to his chair in the living room in the mornings and he'd sit there all day, he couldn't even get up to get a glass of water. After six hospitalizations that year, they implanted a pacemaker/defibrillator in the guy and turned him into the freakin' Energizer Bunny. At least physically... He's in his 80's and is like having a four year old who wants to use power tools and has to be watched without letting him know he's being watched. I have siblings who do not step in and help, unless you count the one who takes him to her house two weekends or so a year. I've resigned myself to it, too, but that resentment you speak of REALLY gets to me sometimes and I've alienated half of them by reminding them that they have a father and that I'm doing this alone here.

I hope things go well for you and your mom when she does have to move in with you. It's not always easy, but I know I couldn't have lived with myself if I hadn't taken care of him when he needed someone to.

"...and has to be watched without letting him know he's being watched."

Man, I know that one! It is so tricky -- they want to be completely independent (and you want that for them too) but little things creep up and you find yourself covertly keeping an eye and ear out, hoping they don't notice. It's a hard and sad process to start parenting your parent. :(

Ah yes, family. You really see who is made of what when it comes time to take care of a parent. My sister (who has lived away from CA for 30+ years) swore up and down that she would come home and help when the time came. A year ago, I told her that I was really needing more help taking care of Mom and she immediately gave me 100 reasons she could not come back anytime soon. :( I have a hard time talking to her these days -- I can't pretend everything is hunky dory between us when all I want to do is scream at her. I have taken care of our Mom for 28 yeasr on my own, with zero help -- I am worn out and am having health issues of my own to deal with now. I am not sure how thisis going to effect our relationship in the long run -- she is my only family and I we are generally very close, but teh resentment really is eating away at me the older I get.

What a turn around your Dad had! Energizer Dad must be a blast/handful to have around the house. It is fantastic there was medical help available for his condition.

Hang in there and take care of yourself as well during all this! :hug:

one day: "I know he's my father, too and that I should be helping. And I would help you, Kathryn, but I have a life." I told her, "damn, I used to have a life before I lived here, too!" Needless to say, things between us haven't been the same since that day, lol. I do realize that everyone has their own life, but it seems to me that it wouldn't be too difficult for my dad's other kids and his grandkids to put him on their calendar, like once every three months or so, take Grandpa to lunch or something. Set aside one day, one afternoon, for the guy every few months, just something he can plan on and look forward to. I've asked them several times, and still, nobody does it except me and my own kids. It's truly unbelievable, they were raised in the same house as I was and they all have opposite values.

Anyway, please remember that you're not the only one and that I am always here if you need an ear or a shoulder.

My health and finances could be better.

Kindness is one of the best traits.

Just checking in and saying a few words helps.

Not just me, but I really believe it helps everyone.

Maybe we're not as alone as we think we are.

But then, I knew that already :)

Thank you, and peace. :)

and thank you, I'm okay for now. As long as my employment continues, I'll survive. :hi:

I'll be fine once my husband's work opens (he's helping open a doggie daycare/boarding facility). He's been unemployed for months, then underemployed. We've wiped out the little savings a grad student can muster. His vision problem will be fixed on the 6th, regardless of the fact that we cannot pay for it at the moment.
But, we are better off than many, and I'm thankful. My car payment was late, and not fully paid, but that'll get taken care of this week. Our dogs are healthy, our cars run, our rent is cheap, I'm getting my PhD in May (defending in January)...so, with the exception of being perpetually broke this summer, we're hanging in there. I feel bad that we can't donate to our favorite charities, but that'll come in time.

Now, I'm off to go vote.

Just look at what a kind person you are. Working hard, broke, just making it but still pushing ahead.

What gets me is the one problem you seem to really have is not being able to donate to your favorite charities.

That says a lot about the kind of person you are, and what a kind person you are.

we really don't give much, but the first thing I'm doing when I get money is donating to the food bank. The food banks really need our support, and kids who aren't in school in the summer suffer when they don't have access to school breakfasts and lunches.
I grew up poor, but didn't know it then. My mom always stressed generosity (even though she's a fiscal conservative).
My husband and I are very fortunate, we really are. This spring/summer has been trying, but it's taught us that we don't really need a bunch of crap to keep us happy. The best days I've had this summer were outdoors with my honey and friends, riding our bikes or going to the river.
:toast: :hug:
Thanks for this OP.

What a nice thing to ask.

"Can I do anything to help?"

Um...can you please do something about the shit luck New Orleans/LA/Gulf Coast is having?! Katrina, Gustav, Ike, oil spill, NAGIN & WASHINGTON(at least they are gone), and this crappy, overly humid weather. It just ain't right for it to be 4am and the temperature to be 84 with a heat index of 90! Any tips for combating agoraphobia?

If you can't take care of these Santa, er, asdjrocky, can you give a stranger a smile? Maybe it will get passed along to another here.

:)

Hope you are having a good day and hope you have someone around you who is willing to ask "Hey, are you OK?"

You really made me laugh on a day that I needed it. So know this, you've passed along much more than just a smile.

My day? Keeps getting better every second.

Sorry about the weather and the mess in the Gulf, that I can't do anything about.

But here's that smile...:)

As for funny, well, I am gay and Jewish, and since I did not get the "rich gene," I'll have to settle for the "funny gene."

:)

I don't know if this will add to your pleasure, but after a really crap day, this little fellow brightens it because he is so damn cute...



It must be that Voodoo, that he do! *His name is Voodoo*

Love the puppy.

You took the time to respond to everyone, even a hate-filled troll whose post count and flame burned higher than his IQ. I think many people were very pleastantly surprised by this thread and the responses. Some of us have it better than others, some worse, but we all felt for a moment someone was here to listen. Your compassion stuck a note with many. I hope you enjoy the symphony you created...it sounds lovely...even that one sour note wasn't really out of place.

And Voodoo is magic, of course!

and much appreciated, especially considering the current climate(and I'm NOT talking about the weather!). It puts a "face" on otherwise anonymous internet posters, and unites us all within the context of the "human condition". Thank you, Rocky!

I've been reading your replies, so I know that things could be better for you. Please accept this little token of my appreciation for you:

:hug:, and know that we're all in this big boat together, leaks and all.

Maybe if enough of us keep bailing, we'll keep it afloat!

We are indeed all in this together.

To borrow the format of another OP:

The Good:

Found the love of my life last year who makes it all worthwhile. :loveya:

Got a roof over my head that won't go away.

Got enough UI for necessities like food, utilities and minor repairs to home and car.

The SO finally found a job and -25K than he was before. But it's very possible this will be a permanent situation, so no more contracting for him. Yay. (He's a sysadmin)

Possibility of starting my own business in the fall/winter. Revised food prep regs state that all food for sale in NC has to be prepared in a commerical kitchen. I'm holding on for the facility I need to come on line in the fall.

Overweight but health is holding steady, so thankful for that.

May have a lead on yet another contract position. Will believe it if I'm ever sitting in a cublicle again. (I'm a technical writer)


The Not so good:

I have struggled with unemployment/underemployment since 2002. Yes, I'm tired. I want out of this hamster wheel, ergo the concept of my own business above.

No savings (all used up)

No health insurance, and like others here I need some dental work now. Overdue on some other necessary medical things here.

Because there is no backup now, any illness/major repair would push me over the edge financially.

So basically worried, but holding steady. Things could be a lot worse in my little universe.

You're a dear for asking. :hug:

I have to believe it's about us not feeling alone.

Thank you.

Hope it helps.

No, I don't have a job at the moment, the bills aren't paid, I've been happy to get one meal a day. The upside is I've lost some weight and I'm off to an interview in about an hour.

Good vibes are appreciated.

-Hoot

I think it went ok.

-Hoot

I hope it is something which will suit you and make you happy, as well as pay some bills!

I'm a well seasoned software engineer/ just a programmer, lol. The environment and commute will suck, but it will keep the bills paid if I land it. They said they have another day of interviews before they proceed, so I don't expect to hear anything before tomorrow.

-Hoot

Go get 'em!

Time will tell now, but it took an hour and a half.

-Hoot

:hug:

I thought well got the bad stuff out of the way this year.

:hug: right back ;)

-Hoot

But doing all the right things, taking care of myself; no drugs or alcohol, I'm eating right and exercising regularly. I have a steady career and good health. Just last week, I finally paid off my credit card, which represented the last of my debt from my failed marriage several years ago. This morning, I took a couple of hours and cleaned litter along 400 feet of riverfront in my city. Several people thanked me. Overall, life is good - just wish I wasn't so lonely.

Thanks for asking!

Good karma on the riverfront!

I have this belief, though it has not yet paned out for me, that if you keep doing good work, a good person will come along.

I wish you luck.

This was such a good talk...and you don't have to be a Buddhist to appreciate it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fb4IYpKYRA

Loneliness is a weird thing - it comes and goes; people are social creatures, I'm usually OK as I spend a lot of time alone but it's those moments when I realize I haven't spoken a word all day, or only talked to myself...that's when it really hits me. I feel invisible.

I struggle with loneliness also. But after finding myself entangled with toxic "significant others" a couple of times, I have arrived at the philosophy in my subject line. In my generation (in my 60's) I find it hard to locate peers who, no matter how financially secure, are not bitter, frightened, mean-spirited GOP/ conservatives. Until the latest financial collapse, I had funds to travel and went to places like Dublin, Berlin and Istanbul by myself - and met great people in each place - whom I'd never have gotten a chance to talk with if I'd been with one of those aforesaid,
toxic significant others.

Sounds like you are doing many things right to stave off the depression which can be triggered by loneliness - healthy diet, exercise, avoiding drugs/alcohol. I have found adult ed classes at my local university to be a good & relatively inexpensive place to spend time with friendly and intellectually curious people. Cleaning up some riverfront is good to do - were there other people with you or was this a solo volunteer effort? Volunteering with others is also a good way to meet kind-hearted, like-minded folks.

Stay strong and don't let loneliness compromise your standards and values for the sake of companionship - that's a lesson it took me a long time to learn!

Other than the economy suckin, my parents house getting flooded, my brother getting killed, and this prostate problem, things aren't too bad.

And you?

So sorry about your brother.

For me, I could say things aren't so bad as well.

that may end up doing me in one of these days if I'm not careful, but it pays fairly well and I have as much work as I can stand to do.

I think this thread is one of the best things that's happened on DU in a while. Thanks.

I think most people are actually decent, kind, empathic and compassionate. I think some people feel that they have to hide their decency for fear of ridicule or of being exploited. It's terrible to live in a culture that so little values these things.

I hope your burdens, and those of all of us, are lightened. This kind of sharing is a step in that direction.

I'm glad you have work, not so glad for the stress.

I want you to know I've always thought of you as a very honest person.

Some would spell it "tetched."

I've always appreciated your contributions to DU.

Roof over my head, but at the moment thanks to my wife's parents more than anything. I am trying to make something out of nothing though, hopefully by next year I'll be earning a living working for myself if things go more or less OK.

Stuck in Argentina because my wife is from here and I don't meet the income requirement to bring her to the U.S. A little bit afraid because there's a problem with rampant robbery and murder here, and being foreign, people think I have money even though I don't.

Thanks for asking. How are you?

Sorry, about the crime, if it's any help at all, we have the same problem in my neighborhood.

I'm doing as well as I can right now, it helps to talk to other people.

I'm doing just fine and yourself? I am presently on lay off scheduled to go back to work in September. No I am not hungry and neither are my neighbors on my block. I have a garden again this year and it has been doing beautiful and feeding families fresh vegetables (oh yeah still feeding Mr.Squirrel). I am still in my home and the bills are paid on (smile)And i got my last two dollars in my pocket and it feels good.

I've got a smaller one this year than last, but I'm still managing a couple of bags a week for the food bank.

So glad to hear you're going back to work.

I've been better, but I could be worse.

we have already been through tough times 2000-2008. We are going to turn the corner and when I say we I mean America and we will be strong but more responsible for its people. My hope.

How are YOU doing?

So far I am not starving and still have a roof over my head.
No real job for years....odd stuff here and there.

Just hit Medicare..but not running to see a doctor. I finally have "insurance" after several years without any, but do
not feel the urge to run to a doctor.....

Have friends and family, but it is struggle to put myself out there..to reach out and mingle.
I want to isolate.

Bills get paid in stages...priorities change each month, out of left pocket into right pocket..so to speak.
I do owe money to several people....but feel that it will never get paid back..sadly. I will never be in a position to
have enough to pay them back

I am grateful that DU and people like you are out there...it helps me to feel I am not totally alone.

It's funny though, as I hear other peoples problems and talk about them, it makes me feel better.

Who knew?

Of course, everyone could be better if they were in Brooklyn.

Nathans, the Cyclone..the beach...incredible food everywhere...

I'm doing ok. Hubby was out of work for a while, finally got a job last Sept. He works at least 65 hours a week. But he has a job!

We have food, and a roof over our head. The bills get paid a little at a time. Hubby needs surgery on his knee, but we don't have health insurance. I don't have my meds for a chronic illness, BUT we have a roof over our heads, and food on the table.

I'm not alone, I have a great family, that helped us get through the really bad times. I have two wonderful children, and two great dogs.

So all in all I'd say I'm better than so many other people. I'm grateful for what I have and don't worry about what I don't.

I was fortunate enough to be able to take in my son's best friend for the summer. Otherwise I don't know where he would have ended up. So, again I'm grateful for what I have.

I hope you're ok, even better than ok. If not, I hope things improve for you. :hug:

Good on your husband for having a job and working at it so hard.

It's wonderful to see how grateful you are for the gifts our lives sometimes gives us.

My adult kids are happy, healthy and employed. My (self-employed) job supports me, the house is paid for, my cancer is in remission and I just got a new puppy.

I almost dislike saying these things after reading about others here who don't have it as good. In a way, it sounds like bragging --- but I certainly don't mean it that way.

Your happiness makes me happy too.

Take care of that puppy!

The companion bird rescue I work with is in dire straights. We're running out of funds and we've had to stop intake of new conures. If you know anyone from CA who's interested in adopting a bird, please send them my way or go to http://www.mickaboo.org.

Donations gratefully accepted.

Maybe you should add: "If you know anyone from CA who's interested in adopting a bird, please send them my way or go to http://www.mickaboo.org ." to your sig line. I know I sometimes check out links in people's sig lines and usually read them. It may 'snag' an interested party.

The ones that I've met in my life have had kind and generous spirits.

As much as this economy has sucked for people, it's sucked even more for their companion animals. When someone is about to lose their home, a pet that costs them thousands a year is simply not supportable. I've had people weeping as they handed their birds to me. It's incredibly sad.

I so want to go to the shelter and get a dog, but what if things don't change? I have enough problems taking care of myself these days.

in appreciation of your work and this kind thread. Does your group have a Facebook page? I'm not that knowledgeable the ins and outs using social networking for causes like this but maybe some college students or HS students could help with this. It would be a good community service project for them.

Our facebook page is http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mickaboo-Companion-Bird-Rescue/98483287751

Thanks again for your help.

I'm a softy when it comes to animal charities. Wish I could help more but I'm on the opposite coast from you.

No medical insurance for well over 10 years and just as long have not seen a doctor. I have health issues which I cannot afford to address. If I go on Medicaid, by my state laws, I will have to sign away the rights to my retirement funds. Without those, I might be healthy but have to live in my car.

My business due to the economy is doing about 1/2 of what it has produced over the years and my ex-husband (whom I reside with) has been out of a job for the last few months. He lost his permanent job about a year and half ago, but being a tax accountant he did work per diem during tax season. An honest thank goodness for the unemployment benefit extension. His assistance on cobra is running out and there is no way he could afford to keep up the full payments for himself and the kids. He has many health issues.

My sons are in state college and we don't know if we'll have enough money left to pay for their tuition and the mortgage on our home. My youngest has been commuting to community college and my oldest dormed up until now. He's getting a cheap car so he can commute to his campus which is 45 minutes from here.

We might have to sell the house if it keeps up. Luckily we bought it in 1987 and it is worth quite more than the balance of the mortgage. I love it here and do not want to move.

I have a sparse personal life to speak of and haven't been on vacation for years and am becoming increasingly agoraphobic.

There is unfortunately nothing that you can do to assist except to think good thoughts for us, as I am sending a :hug: and wishing the best for you.

My daughter is in her third year in state college, I thank God that her mom can help out more right now.

Hang in there!

Wish I could say more.

lucky in many ways. Thank you for asking and reminding us all that we're in this together. :hi:

A good piece of fruit. A day that's not as hot as the day before.

I think a lot of us my be learning very valuable lessons in this day and age.

;-) You're a sweety.

So I know you care.

Are you getting enough to eat these days?
NO.

Do you need to see a doctor?
Yes

How is your health?
OK
Are you among friends and family, or are you alone?
Used to have a girlfriend, got a few friends

Are you lonely? Do you need a friend to talk to?
No, but I could always use another friend

Do you just need someone to listen?
Yes

Do you still have a home?
Victim of foreclosure.

A roof over your head?
Yes
Are your bills paid?
No.
Do you have money in your pocket?
No, but I have change.

No one asks these questions. We've just gotten so mean and divided of late, it hurts my spirit and it makes me yearn for kindness.

So I'm asking, how are you? Can I do anything to help?
First thing on my mind is how to get my house back so I can have my kids stay over again.

All I can do is offer to listen.

You're new here, so I will give you a welcome and offer you my friendship.:hi:

was the second worst thing about my marriage breaking up.

Take care. :hug:

I'm so sorry- what a nightmare!
:cry:

many acquaintances are going through, I'm doing well.

Hang in there!

I have a job until September, and even working only 75% of the hours I should, it's enough. This week's camp is about Chicago, so I'm having my kids build the Sears Tower, Hancock Center, and Aon Center out of Legos, and we talked about the Burnham plan and Columbian Exposition today. I'm applying for others that are more in my field, and thinking about grad school.

I'm worried about everything, but that's sort of my ground state of being, not a cause for concern.

Are you doing ok? It's nice (and healthy) of you to remind us that there are people behind these screennames.

Of course I bet everyone says that until they have to do it.

I understand worry. Worrying is the thing that gets to me.

I'm doing okay, especially since this post. It's great to see the people behind the screens as you so well put it.

The fiance could use a job, so send him some vibes. ((hugs)) adjsrocky, you're a mensch!

That alone makes my day.

Are you getting enough to eat these days? Most of the time
Do you need to see a doctor? probably would be wise

How is your health? pretty fair I do need to get glasses and to a dentist.

Are you among friends and family, or are you alone? Yeah, though there is some clear distance being created on most fronts as folks are dealing with their own lives.

Are you lonely? often, no mate

Do you need a friend to talk to? Sometimes

Do you just need someone to listen? We all do

Do you still have a home? No, renting a room for 65% of my income

A roof over your head? Hanging on for now but it's tempting to put that rent money into a car in case it gets worse so I'm not walking the streets and can get to jobs easier. Not enough money for both right now and had to junk my old bucket.

Are your bills paid? For the most part, after rent the phone is my priority do I can get work

Do you have money in your pocket? $4 on me and 4 or 5 more in the bank makes up my net worth, at the moment.

No one asks these questions. We've just gotten so mean and divided of late, it hurts my spirit and it makes me yearn for kindness.

So I'm asking, how are you? Can I do anything to help? Brother, thank you for being you.

How are you and what can I do to make the ride smoother?

I genuinely like what you post, though it does sometimes get the blood boiling, but that in turn gets the brain thinking, and that's a good thing.

Man do I ever know what you mean about glasses and a dentist. I can't see for shit and there's no way I can go get glasses for 200 bucks right now. Lol, I use reading glasses form Wallgreens for like everything. The teeth? Started going about a year ago.

A lot of us are just hanging on. Sometimes I think we should take what we all have left, if anything, and buy 5 acres that no one else wants.

The lonely stuff? Well, we got DU and some other great sites, right?

Hang in there ol' buddy.

so I'm not sure how much it would take the strain off but its a low risk move that could help me out, good thought.

Hubby and Son's hours have been cut back. Thanks for asking!

Geez, don't you get tired of always having to look on the bright side.

From a diary found in the wilderness-

Left alone with no provisions. All friends are gone. Dangerous animals and unfriendlys all around camp. May not last another day.



Weather is good.

how r you?

But at least we're honest, right?

Hope it gets better.

This is where it starts.

Solidarity


oh yeah, I'm fine as can be expected.

You just keep posting.

It's really good to see the kindness that has come out in this thread. It's done so much for my outlook.

I'm okay. Thanks a bunch for asking.
How are you? Is there anything I can do to help you out??? I can bake you a cake or make you a really good cup of iced coffee!

Me. I'm almost 60, I get enough to eat and my health is good (no insurance so I hope it stays that way)
I try to get out every morning and walk/run to help keep myself in relatively good health. I also carry an inversion table with me on the road so I can hang upside down for awhile everyday (good to get the blood to my head for a bit).
I have a job but it keeps me living in hotels 52 weeks out of the year and I miss my kids terribly. I suffered from terrific depression for the first three years working this job but now I'm able to cope. It's a job and its better having one than not! ...my dream is to farm again and I am living for that day when I can.

I never formed relationships so not sure what I would do with a friend, but I love people and miss interacting with them.
As I live in hotels, I have a roof over my head and my bills are paid (except for the $60,000 student loan I still have.@!*&%?)

Often people ask the perfunctory questions but don't mean it enough to listen to the answer. I think we all hurt, at least a little, and that makes it difficult for us to be empathetic.

Kindness is good and we need to keep it going... much appreciation for doing just that. :hug:

:yourock:

I hope you get back to that farm one day.

We all need some coke and sympathy once in a while and this thread comes as a balm to many here on DU.

Personally, I had a couple of rough years and was kind of forced into retirement in the last 18 months due to health issues, from a career I invested 30 years into. I am fine now though as I am adjusting to this new life, and I have been blessed with wonderful family and an amazing wife. I really can't complain about much, I have food, health insurance, a roof over my head and a garden. I have a few good friends and that makes all the difference.

I am essentially fine now, and as I know you are a fighter and a commited person to causes you believe in, I need to ask, what had you so down this morning when you woke?

You are an outgoing cat and are a receptive caring human being. I am sorry if you felt poorly yourself today, but just look at all the good feelings you generated here on the board. Folks are coming out of the virtual woodwork to chime in, because they can sense your innate goodness and know that you genuinely care. This thread has also allowed us all to see each other in much different light.

Rock, you should consider a job in care-giving in the form of counseling. Mainly for psychiatric patients in distress. This thread alone points the way. Research what is available locally as far as community outreach and/or suicide prevention and the like. You could start by volunteering. I think you are on to something here, and I bet you would like it.

People need to vent if things are painful and I wish my son in law could express himself. He is manic depressive and refuses (like a good ol' Pittsburgh PA macho guy) any of that "psychiatric mumbo jumbo," and certainly would not permit himself to be medicated in any way. He has it pretty good with a wonderful son and a faithful wife, good health, lots of lifelong friends, etc. He owns his own home and runs his own law practice, which has survived in the current economic climate. I just hope he would see his way to find some help.

If you Rocky, or anyone else here feels they need help but can't come to the point of asking for it, please reconsider the effect depression has on those around you. It is destructive in very subtle ways.




Hands off my Social Security!
Hands off Latin America!



Just my dos centavos


robdogbucky

What nice words. I'm happy that you're doing good, and have a loving family around you.

Your words really did bring tears to my eyes and made me smile at the same time.

I really honestly think it comes down to mans inhumanity. My depression, that is. Of course much of it for me, as is for most that have checked in here, is clearly situational and perhaps mendable. (I know it's not a word, but my mom used it.)

This morning, perhaps I mixed a big bowl of situational and added a dash of mans inhumanity, and this thread is what came out of the oven.

It's truly funny how good listening and responding in a totally nonjudgmental manner can make you feel. Maybe you're on to something with that whole helping people angle. Perhaps school is in my future, that is if they'll have a 50 year old high school drop out back.

Your dos centavos are welcome any time amigo.

I figure schoolin' can't hurt (I always have a class or two going ...Ethics, at present)

...any school should be pleased to have you as a student.

Waiting for more tests to see if I had a heart attack and didn't know it. My shepherd, Sam, has lost the use of his back legs but we were able to get a wheelchair for him and my husband invented this contraption that we can use to help him get around.

Do let us know how the test come out, I hope you're okay.

Is that a GSD you speak of? Best damned dogs in the world if you ask me, good on your husband for helping him get around.

We have three. Sweetie came to us as a puppy. Sam and Ranger are rescued. Both were horribly neglected but are now happy to have a home. All of them are wonderful. I will let you know how the testing comes out.

i'm more down than up currently due to some family issues & the general suckitude of the economy but hopefully all will turn out well.

thanks for asking. i wish there was more of this in our daily lives.

God knows I'm no "Mary Sunshine" but it is worth it to ask how people are doing.

When things get bad we often look inward instead of reaching out, I know I do.

Today I'm learning a lot about reaching out.

:pals:

this is me chasing you --->:woohoo: and this is you getting tickled after I catch you ---> :rofl:

hope things get better and better for you and so many du-ers here and elsewhere.

I'm thankful for that.

Want everything you have.

Thankful is good.

It's been a busy, stressful time for me, so I could use a bit more humor. What ya got on tap?

Bartender says to the horse, "Why the long face?"

Yes, its a joke, and a play on words (my favorite kind of humor), but it actually expresses what I feel about the whole "positive thinking" crap that is sold to us. There are many legitimate reasons why people feel what they feel, many of them not under the control of the person (like the horse's long face), yet we are now subjected to sermons and even guilt trips for feeling what we feel.

Another DUer gave out a wonderful suggestion, which has added a lot to my life. That is the book "BRIGHT-SIDED", by my favorite author, Barbara Ehrenreich. I strongly suggest this as reading for thought... especially for those who want to continue foisting this particular "thought" onto others.

I'm going to be making use of your joke! :hi: :pals:

But for 3 years I was under or unemployed, eking out a living between benefitless contracts.

Now, I've been happily and gainfully employed as a public servant, where they recognize and appreciate my talents. And making the most money I've eve made in my life.

For me, it's.... freedom. And it's made life at home very relaxing instead of the usual.... stress.

I'm glad things are going well!

Things could be better. I do have a job and I am grateful for that, plus a handful of excellent friends to be with, and no housing worries. On the flipside, that job is very physical, and I can't put in the time I need to really cover my expenses due to a flare up with my back.... have been suffering disk issues and related spasms, I think. I can't afford an xray or MRI, and even if I could, I am certain the prescribed treatment would be out of my reach. I use a lot of ice and epsom salts, stretch a lot and 'suck it up' at work to hobble along. So it goes.

One thing that has happened because of this place I find myself in is that I have been forced to think about other new options for income. That has driven me back to my paintbox and a fair amount of creative work that really does wonders for the soul, if not the bank account. I don't know if I will ever be able to support myself with art, but I sure do feel better for doing it. :)

How are *you* asdjrocky?

:grouphug:

Good luck with the art, wish I had the talent.

I'm doing okay, and I get better with every reply to this thread.

The last time we had medical for more than a few months every couple of years was a decade ago. There are areas where this is starting to have consequences. Nothing serious, as far as we know,(knock on wood) but it is becoming a concern. There is also some pretty serious dental need but i suspect we are in increasingly good company there.

In spite of the above, we feel incredibly fortunate. We live with a pretty low income but we have enough to cover our needs. I am in a loving relationship and we have a mutual dream. We have wonderful children who are helpful, considerate and loving (i read them your post and the oldest said "Thank you for making our day a little brighter". The others said to tell you that we are "Fine, thank you".) We are just fairly happy people trying to live a simple life.





:hug: And how are you, asdjrocky? Is life treating you fairly? Have you been receiving back the kindnesses you bestow upon others? I DO hope so.

I'm finding a lot of kindness here, for me and for others, and that is indeed a good thing.

when I got to work. They've shut us down (the owners)for the rest of the week. Contract negotiations with one of our largest customers isn't going well apparently and so they shut us down. By Monday we may very well be laid off. They said they are paying us through Friday this week.

Thank you for asking. I'm not in dire straits and I do have a loving husband who is working. We've been more fortunate that some we know.

I hope you're ok and have all that you need to get through the days with joy in your heart.

You gave me some hope for humanity today. That was a lot !!

:hug:

aA
kesha

I know it doesn't help to know you're not alone in your job worries.

I do hope it works out for you.

feel selfish in my self pity moment.

:hug: to you and to everyone in this thread.


aA
kesha

My unemployment benefits are being restored next week, so things are looking up.:woohoo:

Probably helps with those pesky little luxuries like food and shelter.

that there is lots of love on DU. I have felt it up close and personally. It is a wonderful thing.

you know how to make yourself ok. when the meanness gets you down, you show a bet of kindness and concern....

I'm starting to really like the sound of that word.

This should be a sticky :grouphug:

:hug: life's been better, life's been worse. There's a roof over my head and food for my animals, and good people like you to remind me why I still come to DU :hi:

Good people are worth more than all the wealth in the world, something the looters will never ever understand. Cheers, friend! :toast:

I hope you are doing well.... as well.

Take care,

Dave

I am grateful for all of you...

I mean, when I was a kid it was easy, you just knocked on their door and asked if they wanted to play.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

aA
kesha

That's a big deal.

you can do anything.:fistbump:

I say this from personal experience.:pals:

Edited to add: 12 years in September.

I've been looking for work for almost two years now -- just doing some part-time stuff. At my age, I fear I'll never find full-time work in my field (or any field) again. I'm essentially living off the equity of my house. That will run out soon and then I don't know what I'll do.

It's so nice to have someone ask.

Glad I could help by asking. Perhaps we've all learned a very simple lesson today.

And stop asking so many Goddamn questions.

Were you always funny? Were you funny as a kid?

Who do you take after, your mom or your dad? Were they funny?

What does the name taterguy mean? I like your name and I think it's funny. How did you come up with it?

Do you like bananas?

True Blood or Twilight?

And I agree with you. More of those questions would absolutely make this a better place to live.

Day to day- It's good to know others care.

Thanks for checking in.

Things have been bumpy this year. My Dad passed away last Christmas, and things haven't bee "right" since, it seems. Mr. Banana has become semi-invalid with herniated discs and increasingly debilitating diabetes, #1 Son has been suffering with OCD and a severe bout of anorexia.. and all the stuff that goes with emotional difficulties and incipient alcoholism and no insurance (at least until January when Obamacare kicks in...) As primary caretaker I feel I need someone to lean on once in a while, and there's no one in condition to do that right now. I persevere in the belief that all this is temporary.

On the plus side, while things are getting tighter, our creature comforts of food and shelter are not imperiled right now. We have a modest pension in the offing in the next couple of years.

Thanks so much for letting me vent.

People gotta do it, and you've got a lot to vent about.

Hang in there.

many here.

Only our own, so it's often a matter of perspective.

You have good eyes.

:hi:

Are YOU okay?

Coming from somone you know likes you and wants you to do well.

You know you're one of my favorite folks and it's great of you to ask. I just want a job.

There's a lot of situational depression that just goes along with being broke for so long, and I've thrown in a little mans inhumanity to man to spice it up today.

Actually, just posting this and keeping an eye on it has done a lot for my spirits.

-William Churchill

FWIW. I know EXACTLY the position you are in.

Hell, we all know the road through hell these days.