NASA finds acid eating bacteria

The NAtional Association for Shooting Attorneys, headed by Dick Cheney, has discovered a bacteria that eats acid in Cheney's blood.
The sump pump installed in place of Cheney's heart has caused some acid-eating bacteria to be created in the anus of Dick Cheney.
The bacteria was first found on Sean Hannity's tongue, but later was traced to Cheney's anus. Other right-wing television propagandists are being tested and it appears the bacteria has mysteriously spread to the noses and tongues of them all!

Scientists have developed an amino acid based compound to fight the bacteria and plan to use it to quell the outbreak. Getting the compound to those affected will be done by implanting it in Sarah Palin's ass, because all the affected persons will be visiting the location with high frequency!


You can't make this shit up! (I can, but you can't!)