True tales of the Rapture: Tell us your story of how you survived the End Times!

I was watching an episode of Mythbusters with my son on the sofa. He's only 9 but he has these big wolf-cub feet and when he puts em on me, everything is right with the world. I think that alone could stave off the Rapture. At the moment it was scheduled to happen I was probably telling him for the 19th time that the guns they use in Mythbusters are very dangerous and are not toys.

How about you? What were you doing when the redeeming hand of God failed to show up?

PB

I guess that's why I can't see Jerry Falwell!

I bet you were wishing for the Rapture if I understand what Imitrex is for...

:(

Glad you're still with us though!

PB

:nuke:

I really didn't think it would happen during the race. I was right. :)

Just sayin'.

Heh heh, or if none of the jockeys disappeared but one or more of the horses did!

:rofl:

PB

it would be safe to spend the time with her, since neither one of us had a chance in Hell of being raptured.

:rofl:

PB

...watching the Marble Hornets season one DVD. Then I had some peanut butter crackers and coffee. Then I fell asleep. Woke up with the phrase, "The Sorting Tree" in my head.

And now it's time for Doctor Who. Life is good.

...late tonight. "Blink" deliciously freaked the kids out (actually we all screamed during that one part when you first see the fangs and claws) so I'm hoping to drop some New Who and then for those who haven't fallen asleep out of self-defense, I'm going to drop an old Tom Baker episode on them. No, scratch that, it's going to be Peter Davidson and it's going to be Four to Doomsday or Kinda.

Always nice running into another Who fan!

:hi:

PB

;)

(I totally heart Vincent D'Onofrio).

:rofl:

I guess they could also be called Squats or Cuerrels but they first doesn't seem to fit what I imagine the offspring would look like and the second sounds uncomfortably similar to a unit of radioactive measurement....

PB

...sometimes that's good, Dragon Age II not withstanding.

:hide:

PB

:toast:

I hear ya there.

PB

After that, I drank coffee and it went down the wrong way causing me to nearly choke to death but obviously, something divine intervened.

Now I'm watching a crap movie and surfing the net, looking for answers knowing there are none.

the looting party down the street to start. :evilfrown:

brb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AscPOozwYA8

And I saw God.

saw a bunch of somethings flying in the sky.

Got all excited thinking I'd get some good movie footage of Rapturees, but it turned out to be a cloud of Mayflies engaging in a bug orgy.

What if all of those who were saved have just been erased from our memory and we now are living in Hell?

.

Except I have bad dreams."

Hamlet

those last couple months were pure hell

and surfed the net all day. Usual Saturday...

with just a kiss of water. It was rapturous. Now on to making dinner.

Shouldn't I have magically passed through it or something?

:rofl:

Rapture technician needed to repair malfunction! Shouldn't God know about this?

That seemed to be enough, for some reason.

and wrote.

and, lo and behold, she stayed put. but, then again, she tends to hold on for dear life.

All too soon they fall in love with the Nintendo DS. :( I've got a 9 year old and I physically overpower him and drag him into my lap.

"Papa!" he says, indignantly.

"Until you're strong enough to physically break free, you're going to be in my lap while we watch Doctor Who. Just as it was with my mother and I!" I say.

A new cycle begins. :)

PB

I figured I better make her last meal with me memorable!

:evilgrin:

Twice!

....waiting for my fundie neighbor to throw another log on his never-ending smoldering backyard fire and to watch him tend to his beer can collection. When he failed to appear with more wood, I became worried. I called his home and his wife, (Jewish?), said she hadn't seen him since noon. It's now 7:30pm and the fire's gone out.

....I've always thought that I was a better Christian than my neighbor, apparently not....I should have joined the NRA....

but my water heater raptured this morning. The event didn't hit the major godly retributions. It was a slow leak so no flooding. It didn't explode, there was no lava flow and the earth didn't shake, but the heater definitely left the premises. Repair guy just left. I have a new one and I hope this lasts until the next Rapture. They do come about 10 to 15 years apart, don't they?

A nice blueberry vodka mixed with diet root beer. Then I played some Tiger Woods 12 and some Borderlands.

before the altar of Bastet, spent a pleasant hour discussing quantum physics and string theory with the ghost of Dostoyevsky over morning tea, and added a bit more manure to the psilocybin beds in the basement.

Mindful of the lenghtening afternoon, I headed out to the vineyard with my lute and serenaded the grapes. As usual, the larks and finches sang harmony while the deer reposed at my feet.

I then went inside to the library where I laid a small fire on the hearth and consulted with my raven over the dinner menu. My suggestion of coq au vin was met with a terse "nevermore", so we settled on cioppino.

After dinner I retired once more to the library with a snifter of Napoleon brandy, leaving the household brownies to clean up the supper dishes, and watched through the French doors as a gentle rain began to fall. The raven and I had a lively conversation over the relative merits of Hegel, Bakunin, and Marx.

All in all, just another Saturday. I must be off now, it's time for the nightly astral travel exercises with my cat.

sw

One word, in all seriousness: Badass.

:thumbsup:

PB

...and drinking flagons of fresh puppy blood, as atheists are wont to do on the weekend. Just to be on the safe side, however, I set down the roasted baby leg I was gnawing on at around 5:55 PM to recite the words, "I accept Jesus Christ as my personal Savior."

I didn't rise bodily into Heaven, but then again, nothing too terrible has happened to me so far apart from a bit of indigestion from overdoing the feasting a bit. I should pick a smaller baby next time.

I love it, heh heh! And Saint Peter would have to throw down an extra setting at the Table of Life- you might even be able to bring along the baby leg- like there's a grandfather clause or something!

:rofl:

PB

:grr:

Heaven's pretty bitchin

:evilgrin:

PB

we did have a tiny earthquake at 7 pm. Barely noticable. God hiccuped, I guess.

was a great time and there was much laughter when people were discussing the end of the world tonight.

Friends, laughter, discussion about impending Universal Doom...and probably cake. Who can beat that? The older I get, it's things like that that I cherish the most.

PB

I'm just asking..
:shrug:

I did honk a lot for a Dream Act demonstration at the intersection of Story and White. The Lord probably decided he didn't want to deal with all that noise. :)

pool side... nice sunset, actually walking...

Had some money riding on Mucho Macho Man so I wasn't too happy at the end of the race (he came in sixth) but it could have been worse. Imagine if my horse won and right after he crossed the finish line I got raptured up. I would have been the only person telling Jesus to let me go back to earth--more particularly to Monmouth Park racetrack so I could collect my winnings.

Actually Monmouth Park is a very nice family oriented race track inhabited mostly by nice low key fans, a few hard core horseplayers, touts, cheats, scammers and the very fact that I think it's a nice place probably makes it plain why I have virtually no chance of getting raptured any time soon.

Mildly S&M themed. She stayed with me for a while as I walked the bar district here in Indy and then I let her fly away. Some others in our group were able to get old shoes aloft with ballons. Tall rubber boots worked best when stuffed with a large, heavy duty balloon and inflated.

...the love was meant to be, they'll eventually get snagged on a tree or a power line and come back to you.

:rofl:

PB

I kept in mind that the Bible says that nobody knows when it's coming.

I also ate Elizabeth's Pizza's sub and a five layer pie. That was great.

U-turn to take a picture of sign on back window of a old pick-up truck:

I survived the Rapture, bitches.

Can't get the damn phone pic to e-mail now, drat.

Robbie Robertson's new album "How To Be Clairvoyant." We had a mild earthquake last night. fun for everyone.

on Roku when it came to pass.