Abortion saved my life

I almost died in an emergency room because the doctor on call refused to perform a necessary procedure
BY MIKKI KENDALL

There's this lawmaker out of Kansas, Rep. Peter DeGraaf, who has a lot to say about abortion. He's currently best known for saying that women should plan ahead in case of rape and not expect their regular insurance to cover an abortion after an assault. And I could spend a lot of time discussing the flaws in his logic, or even hashing out when life begins, but what I'm really concerned about is the idea that anyone besides a pregnant woman should have a say in what she does with her body after finding out she's pregnant.

I'm a mom, and I love my sons more than anything. And it is because I love them that I had an abortion at 20 weeks. It was my fifth pregnancy (I'd had two earlier miscarriages), and, as it turned out, my last. There was trouble from the beginning; I didn't experience any of the normal indicators of pregnancy, so I was already ten weeks along when I found out. I hadn't so much as missed a period; in fact, I was seeing an OB/GYN because of the increased heaviness in my cycle. When we found out, I talked it over with my husband and we debated an abortion before deciding we'd try to make it work. My doctor told me that my pregnancy was very high risk and that she wasn't sure of a good outcome. Per her instructions, I took it very easy because I wanted to give the baby the best possible chance. But I kept having intermittent bleeding and I knew there was a good chance I wouldn't be able to carry to term.

I was taking an afternoon nap when the hemorrhaging started while my toddler napped in his room when I woke up to find blood gushing upward from my body. Though I didn't know it at the time, I was experiencing a placental abruption, a complication my doctor had told me was a possibility. My husband was at work, so I had to do my best to take care of me and my toddler on my own. I managed to get to the phone and make arrangements for both of my children before going to a Chicago hospital.

Everyone knew the pregnancy wasn't viable, that it couldn't be viable given the amount of blood I was losing, but it still took hours for anyone at the hospital to do anything. The doctor on call didn't do abortions. At all. Ever. In fact, no one on call that night did. Meanwhile, an ignorant batch of medical students had gathered to study me -- one actually showed me the ultrasound of our dying child while asking me if it was a planned pregnancy. Several wanted to examine me while I lay there bleeding and in pain. No one gave me anything for the pain or even respected my request to close the door even though I was on the labor and delivery floor listening to other women have healthy babies as the baby I had been trying to save died in my womb.

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http://www.salon.com/life/feature/2011/05/26/abortion_saved_my_life/index.html

that making abortion illegal would end abortions need to be brought up short in the most graphic fashion.

God what fucking morons live in this country? What about this woman's children at home? What about her husband? I want to slap that ignorant fucking C word of a cousin who called, thinking she needed to be told that this was against God's plan. So, God's plan wasn't technology that could be used to save the life of a mother when the fetus was dying anyway? Really? Oh good God when are these morons going to wake the fuck up and realize that if God created everything, GOD created technology. And Medical Procedures. And Abortion. This is the only reason most of these idiots agree with abortion and even when faced with it would just watch this poor woman suffer in pain than end it by doing a simple procedure! Why in the HELL did this woman not sue this hospital?
Duckie

I'm right behind you in line to slap the ignorant cousin too.

and I really want to physically abuse the doctor who refuses to do a life-saving procedure.

That baby was dead or dying. It was putting him/her out of misery and saving the mom's life. It wasn't about abortion, pro-choice or antiabortion (I refused to call it pro life because to be TRULY pro life you have to be anti death penalty and they most certainly are not). They violated the Hippocratic Oath by doing such HARM to that poor woman.

are immune from lawsuits for such refusals, in some states. Lawmakers like Rep. DeGraaf, who think there is NEVER a valid reason for an abortion, have seen to that.

in some states they will not even remove a dead fetus. They say they need to wait for labor and deliver it. This has caused some women to cross into other states that are less anti-abortion.

The doctor who "did not do abortions, Ever" should be fired.

I don't think God would agree to allow the suffering of women just so that a fetus can survive, and he does, he's an asshole and I want no part of him.
Duckie

My two kids at home almost lost their mother because someone decided that my life was worth less than that of a fetus that was going to die anyway. My husband had told them exactly what my regular doctor said, and the ER doctor had already warned us what would have to happen. Yet none of this mattered when confronted by the idea that no one needs an abortion. You shouldn't need to know the details of why a woman aborts to trust her to make the best decision for herself. I don't regret my abortion, but I would also never use my situation to suggest that the only time another woman should have the procedure is when her life is at stake. After my family found out I'd had an abortion, I got a phone call from a cousin who felt the need to tell me I was wrong to have interfered with God's plan. And in that moment I understood exactly what kind of people judge a woman's reproductive choices.

social conservatives are willing to let women die for their hypocrisy - after all, I rarely see any of them shed a tear for the babies who were murdered during the bombing of Iraq during the Bush administration.

between rich and poor; and about all the babies who die unnecessarily before, during, or in the first year after birth because of poverty and lack of healthcare. Aren't these also 'late abortions'?!

The titles of two recent articles by British right-wing journalist Melanie Phillips in the RW tabloid 'Daily Mail' just about sum it up:

February 28th, 2011: What hope is there if doctors don't respect unborn children?

May 23rd, 2011: Boo me if you like, but it's time to ignore the bleeding hearts and shut down the ministry of foreign aid


Because it's perfectly OK if *born* (and unborn) children die of poverty. It's their fault for choosing to be born in a developing country, after all!

homes, teenagers etc. They don't shed tears for a child outside of the womb.

They don't care about womens lives they never have.

Sue the fucking fucker who refused to come save her. Sue the hospital. Sue everyone involved. The ONLY thing these fuckers care more about than fetuses is money. Hit 'em where it hurts. Gawd, this is so fucking disgusting. What fucking idiot doctor doesn't do a necessary D&C?!?!? I guess dead fetuses count more than live women, more than that woman's live children. Sick sick sick sick.

At the point when she's lost that much blood, the baby is very likely already dead. At that point there's is no reason to call it an "abortion". At most, it is a "spontaneous abortion," i.e. miscarriage. If she had come in with a TUMOR that was causing her to lose blood like that, they would have done whatever was necessary to save her. Well, at the point when the baby is already dead, it should be treated like the TUMOR it is, and removed as quickly as possible so the mother will survive.

That doctor needs to lose his license so that some woman doesn't lose her LIFE, like this one almost did.

Seriously, he's going to KILL someone, one day.

of dumbf*ck doctors. I'd sue the hell of that asshole who refused to save her.

and also from the threat of losing his license for endangering the life of his patient, thanks to lawmakers like Rep. DeGraaf. Rep. DeGraaf does not think there is EVER a valid reason for an abortion. Read his website - his position is very clear. He is far from alone.

are a tiny part of the population. Most people believe it's none of their business. The anti-choice people are just so damn LOUD and INSANE.

When an ER doctor refuses to save the life of a patient, that ER doctor needs to find a new job....like ditch digging.

Women have to be more vocal. For shit sake, problems with fetuses develop in the womb. And those medical problems MUST be addressed.

Stand up for women's reproductive rights or we are nothing more than chattel.

Rep. DeGraaf can kiss my ass and I'll tie his dick in a knot.

feared any negative consequences from this decision. The doctor won't be fired. The hospital had to have known that he would refuse to perform an abortion under any circumstances, and yet there he was, in a position to decide that this woman should die because he didn't want to abort her doomed fetus. I believe it is actually FEDERAL law that prohibits "discrimination" against health care providers who refuse to perform abortions, even in situations like this.

These misogynists are not a tiny part of the population. They are a substantial minority. Rep. DeGraaf won his seat while frankly stating his position and promising to try to enact laws prohibiting ALL abortions. Lots of other state lawmakers, in many states, have identical or similar views. That's why we have this flurry of anti-choice legislation going on right now in dozens of states AND at the federal level.

I think if Rep. DeGraaf had enough of a dick to tie a knot in, he wouldn't hate women so much that he wants them to die. Pathetic, inadequate losers hate and fear women the way he does. Real men don't.

means there are a helluva lotta dudes out there with teeny weenies.

Young women better stand up, get vocal, and demand their rights. No one can fight their fight for them.

It's much worse now than it was in the late '70's.

that an abortion was necessary in that situation, or in any situation, ever. On his website, he says: "Far too many babies have been killed on the pretense that the mother’s life is at risk." He believes that pregnant women should remain in that state until they either give birth or die. I don't think he much cares which of those things happens in the end.

prisoner until they die or give birth? That is what I am reading here...

all I can think is that this kind of thing needs to happen, preferably over and over again, to the doctors who think that no woman ever needs an abortion ever no matter what the circumstances. I don't wish this kind of emotional and physical suffering on any woman, so what I REALLY wish is that these men could themselves experience this.

why not let everyone know which hospital this happened at? maybe if the public was aware of such lax and indifferent treatment there would be a bit of an outcry and that motherfucking er piece of shit doctor would be out the door.

i don't understand why the author of this piece doesn't mention the hospital by name. it drives me crazy when people tell horror stories and then go on to protect the doctor/dentist/business/etc.

why protect them?
are they afraid the dr/hospital will sue?
if what they say actually happened (and i absolutely believe this woman is telling the truth) then their lawsuit would be worthless and she could counter sue.

the public deserves to know which hospital this was. the hospital deserves to have that patient tell.

I don't think their idol Jesus ever charged for one of them medical fixes he performed, did he?

You should sue the first doctor for reckless endangerment. If you died your family would have a case for negligent homicide or at the least manslaughter.

What this woman went through is vile & ludicrous.

I believe the man is what we used to refer to as a "royal asshole".

and all thouse idiot interns should be made public. Women should know that they could die at the hands of that hospital and doctors and go elsewhere if at all possible. The doctor may have had the legal right to not provide her proper healthcare, however he won't stay in business long if he doesn't have patients. Doctors like that need to be driven out of the business.

of most of these wingnuts is that they want to impose their Christian values - anti-sex, anti birth control, and morality - on everybody else.

Not every religion believes life begins at conception. In fact, a person on that thread outlined how the Jewish faith views when life begins.

One of the wingnuts - that Jill Stanek - is such a racist, http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/blog/2010/02/17/just-ignore-facts-maam-jill-stanek-write-ultra-right-outlets you'd have to be blind to miss it.

99% of this "anti-abortion" crusading is actually anti-women and anti-sex. Just like most right wingers are. They holler that they value life, but they really don't value life at all - they value controlling other people, and dictating morality is a time-tested method of controlling others. If you want an example, see the entire history of the Catholic Church, particularly during the Dark Ages.

I find it fascinating that people who fervently believe in science when it says life begins at conception suddenly don't believe in science when it doesn't agree with their religion.

where are the voters who will go to the polls and keep such assholes from winning elections?

are state elections gerrymandered to such a degree that there are districts for the talibornagains to win?

in the dark heart of my hatred for such a person - I'd like to see the cartoon in which someone beats the shit out of de Graaf and then asks him why he didn't plan for this by having an ambulance on call.

...and then we, too, could laugh at such witty wisdom.

Every time I see a fundie talking about what is good for others, and how others "ought" to live, I get so pissed off. Who the hell gave them he right to decide our fate? When will they start to grow out of their tribal patriarchal mentality?

I'm reminded of this quote ever so often when I see them

Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.

Who the hell are these knuckle-dragging Neanderthals that they should decide that a woman with a serious medical problem should die. I'm so tired of the excuses that always include God this or God that. What I cannot stand is the thought of some old, fat, white legislator stepping between a woman and her doctor and what she can do with her body. I'm sorry you had to go through something like this. These friggin' fundamentalists need to be put in their place.

Thank you for surviving

I mean that - it may seem silly, but its all true

Thank you for surviving and telling the tale