Reasons why people vote Republican

I saw some of these on T-shirts one time and made up a few of my own. Can you think of any additions?

Obama won't let me harvest the organs of 9/11 first responders. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama doesn't realize that the 2nd Amendment gives me the right to own a missile launcher and enough assault weapons to blow the moon out of orbit. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama was born on Uranus. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama won't let me hunt the homeless for sport. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama wants to let gay people vote and own land. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama doesn't realize that it's "nookyoular" not "nuclear". That's why I vote Republican.
Obama is a communist because his political views are to the left of Hitler's. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama doesn't realize that billionaires need money more than impoverished families. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama was the 20th hijacker. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama won't nuke France. That's why I vote Republican.
Obama doesn't realize that Jesus was white, voted Republican, only cared about abortion and homosexuality, hated the poor, and loved guns. That's why I vote Republican.

Fear and Hate

Gullibility

For every liberal that gets the humor, there's going to be three Faux News junkies that think they are completely serious arguments, and probably repeat them later.

Though I gotta admit I like the idea of the Second Amendment authorizing me to have weapons sufficient to defend me and my family against the entire United States military...

There's a huge pile of abandoned satellite TV dishes in this field out in the boonies about thirty miles from here. I was thinking, as an art project, of going and buying a big pile of them, painting them blue, and setting up a big square grid of them in my back field. If someone asks what the are, I'll tell them I play blues HAARP.