Show him your BADGE ! LOL

A DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there," as he points out the location.

The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and

proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? "

The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and

it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the

fence and yells at the top of his lung
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
" Your badge. Show him your BADGE !"

:toast:

Ats alotta bull.

No an animal I would want to tangle with, even if it is "just an herbivore".

It's the cows you gotta be careful with. The bulls are big babies.

went into the pen with a pitchfork in hand. the bull was only afraid of that. Without it, you were stomped. I think they are beautiful animals. Beautiful color.

I can't get my breath for laughing.

rec

:rofl:

- LULZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ


















"Rise like Lions after slumber
In unvanquishable number,
Shake your chains to earth like dew
Which in sleep had fallen on you-
Ye are many — they are few"

~Percy Bysshe Shelley

:fistbump:

for the same reasons we're agitated now.

Well done. :thumbsup:

Shelley's unconventional life and uncompromising idealism<6><7>, combined with his strong disapproving voice, made him an authoritative and much-denigrated figure during his life and afterward. Mark Twain took ndeedparticular aim at Shelley in In Defense of Harriet Shelley, where he lambasted Shelley for abandoning his pregnant wife and child to run off with the 16-year-old Mary Godwin.<8> Shelley never lived to see the extent of his success and influence; although some of his works were published, they were often suppressed upon publication.

He became an idol of the next three or four generations of poets, including important Victorian and Pre-Raphaelite poets. He was admired by Karl Marx, Oscar Wilde, Thomas Hardy, George Bernard Shaw, Bertrand Russell, William Butler Yeats, Upton Sinclair and Isadora Duncan.<9> Henry David Thoreau's civil disobedience and Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi's passive resistance were apparently influenced and inspired by Shelley's non-violence in protest and political action, although Gandhi does not include him in his list of mentors.<10>
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Percy_Bysshe_Shelley

(and tell everyone)

:rofl:

Thanks for the thread, malaise.:thumbsup:

the sisters thought it was close enough! :hi:

and peace to you.:) :hi:

:fistbump:

Lou

:D

:-)

:D

Tending his crops an Amish farmer sees a stranger in a big straw hat with tea bags hanging from it, bending over his pond and scooping up water with his hand and drinking it. The farmer knew that this pond was polluted with pig and cow crap so he yelled out (thinking the stranger was also Amish), "Trinken nicht das vasser."

The tea-bagger looked up and said, "You see these tea bags? That means I'm an American and in America we speak American!"

"So sorry." said the farmer, "What I said was use both hands. You'll get more water."

:P :hi:

:D

Thanks for posting.

:rofl:

:rofl:

:rofl:

Thanks! Needed it.

:hi:

by journalists from Harper's Weekly (now defunct) as to why he had quit his job at a McCorporate position to buy and start a small dairy farm.

"I prefer cowshit to bullshit," my father replied.

I had to become an adult myself before I 'got the joke' :)

On Bullshit? :D

"Your call is Important to us--the Truth about Bullshit"--Laura Penny

:)

Thanks

His badge his worthless - unless he flashes a warrant, he can't conduct the search. Also, he could sue the rancher for failing to warn about the mortal danger posed by the bull.

Bet you're just barrels of fun at a party.

:rofl:

Needed that right now.

:hi:

:D

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

"I AM AN ENEMY OF THE STATE"
Have done so for 40 years now.