The greatest movie you'll never see, By Mark Morford

Hey, I have an idea! Instead of a movie about, say, a wretched middle-aged letch who poses on Facebook as a hunky teen stud so as to befriend, seduce and subsequently ruin the life of a pretty 14-year-old white girl from the suburbs, one whose parents just so happen to be Clive Owen and Catherine Keener who both appear to be ridiculously panicky and distressed throughout much of the movie ...

How about we make a movie about, say, the countless ignitions and romances, love notes and marriages, wedding photos and baby pictures, evolutions and even revolutions currently flooding all over those same networks like sticky fire in the veins of our jaded and bitter god?

Or hell, go ahead, make one about a creepy and possibly illegal hookup, but let's dare to suggest that it doesn't actually end up traumatizing everyone involved and instead is just one of those obnoxious things that happens in life, and we groan and get over it and move the hell on? Is that too much to ask?

Hey, I have an idea! Instead of one more military apocalypse porn fantasia about enormous, screamingly mechanized super-aliens who invade Earth to colonize/impregnate/beat the living crap out of us for no valid reason whatsoever, but oh my goodness they somehow just can't seem to annihilate our tiny, ludicrous speck of a planet with their insanely advanced superhuman weaponry because our astonishing ingenuity and unquenchable love of life finally proved just too much for them ... ...

(Full URL: http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2011/02/23/notes022311.DTL&nl=fix)

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and he comes through it stronger, happier, and still confident in his atheism.

http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTc2OTIwNTIwNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNjQxODYxMQ@@._V1._SY317_.jpg

But the "he" is a she.

Nothing new under the sun. Except maybe crappy CGI.