and 2 white men at the table next to us were talking about black people being either stupid or lazy since they had the same educational opportunities as they did but were on welfare instead of working. I stood up and told them that they were clueless racists, I was loud and angry.

I thought the OP was asking about times we actually intervened while a PoC was being harassed and called them on it.

Misunderstandings.... living in the South you often have to say "That's some racist shit, dude."

What's worse is saying it to relatives. Repeatedly.

Relatives is one thing, but it takes some guts to stand up to a stranger and tell them to their face that they are being racist.

anywhere they wanted to go, including to Mosque. There were about 20 of us rotating and I think that most of the time no one harassed them. But at least twice (right before there was a vandalism episode on the Denver mosque), the women were abused verbally because of their hijab, in front of their children. I was just angry enough to take them on (teen boys one time and a adult male and female couple the second). Once I yelled at them, other bystanders joined in. I was heartened by that. In both instances, the perpetrators took off, maybe not ashamed, but certainly chastened with the knowledge that in Denver, at least, they WOULD be called on that kind of behavior.

positive in the face of all the horrific events. I don't recall anyone even hesitating to volunteer. Sometimes the "right" thing to do is just instinctive and automatic.

Other people joined in. It takes just one person to stand up to the bullies and others will join in.

Because yes I have, but I've only witnessed something I could intervene in when it involved someone I knew.

Also, the stranger was a cop.

But you still have to stand up to the bullies.

They got in their car after we finished and as I was getting my car, a neighbor woman living next door standing in her front yard waved me over.

So I walked over to her and she said I hope you aren't going to put these "hispanics" in that home.

I told her that I don't discriminate against anybody because of their race.

Shortly after I got home, I received a call from her, she identified herself and said "I am so sorry and ashamed of myself, that's just not like me, I don't know why I said that.

It felt really good after receiving her apology, it made my day.

Thanks for the thread. ProudLib

strange combination

were renters and not home owners, race had nothing to do with it.

My own gut feeling is that her husband had great influence against her better nature and perhaps she was worried about how he would react to Latino neighbors.

Despite their overt racism they deny they're racist when confronted.

My brother-in-law was constantly using the N word at family functions. I told him off and told him we were not raising our kids to be racists and that he needed to watch his mouth around us. Between that sort of thing and some of their other negative attitudes, we haven't been around my husbands family in probably 17 years. It makes it especially annoying to be called a racist around here because people make assumptions.

I can't walk in their shoes. A White can't be Black and a Black can't be White. I may say something that is pretty innocent and have it taken the wrong way because I did not understand a culrural sensitivity to an issue that I have not faced.

You know where your heart is, be content with that, and keep doing what you are doing, teaching your kids and eventually grandkids that racism is for losers and they are better off never embracing it, even beyond the moral depravity of racism.

BBQ video was confronting a stranger and went the extra distance. I just think that deserves some extra commendation. Don't think I'm saying people shouldn't stand up to racism when and where they find it. You were definitely in the right to stand up to your BIL.

Back in the 80's in the small kkk town of Monticello, Florida, my car broke down in a grocery store parking lot. I put up my car hood and a seemingly nice white man stopped to help me.

As his head was deep inside the front of my car I heard him say, "I bet you're glad some n!@@#r didn't stop to help." I yelled at him to get out of my car, that I didn't need his racist assed help, "Now, GET!" I yelled.

That was one of the times. I confront racism when I hear, see or feel it. Have schooled relatives, acquaintances and friends. A friend of mine once called Brazil nuts, "n!@@#r toes" and I was so upset that I cried.

I've lived in the deep south my entire life and see this all too often.

Why would someone who stopped to help feel compelled to say such a thing? Weird. Good on you for yelling at him!

black lady as I drove past them on my way home one day. Without a single thought I whipped my car around, behind hers. The cop had her face down on the hood of her car and she was sobbing, her grandchildren were in the back seat of her car, crying and screaming. I wrote my name, address and phone # on a piece of paper, and got out of my car. I walked up to them, glared and the cop, and put that paper in her hand, telling her that if she needed a witness to his mistreatment of her, I would gladly help. Then, the cop said he was just trying to find out what "she was doing in our fair town", I snorted and said "Obviously she's someone's cleaning lady, which you could see if you just looked at the mops and brooms sticking out of her trunk." Yeah, I live in a very white suburb, but I was still shocked by his nastiness. I returned to my car and waited for them to leave, mad as hell at the way this elderly woman had been treated.

For two weeks that cop followed me everywhere to the city limits. My husband thought I was making too much of his following me, until one night the cop stopped us while he was driving. "What's the problem officer?" my husband asked. "You need to tell this woman of yours to mind her own business, if she knows what's good for her," "Well, that won't work, no one tells my wife what she can or can't do - she won't listen." "Well, then don't be surprised if something happens to her," he said before returning to his car.

"Much ado about nothing, you say?" I asked my husband, as he whipped the car around and headed back home. He made one angry phone call to his long time friend - the local police chief, and told him all that had happened, including his threat against me. The cop was fired the next morning. I also received a lovely phone call from the lady's pastor, thanking me for my actions.

Does this count?

Yes, that is certainly sticking your neck out against racism. I'm glad your husband knew the police chief!

Just as racist, but not overt about it.

Racism on the down and low.

Neither of us is a black person, and there was no meta about it, nor was it a discussion of rap lyrics. He very easily could have used any other word but he said it. I advised him not to continue to use that word around me.

It was more of a chilly discussion rather than an argument, but he spent a good deal of time trying to convince me to say it was "okay" - "It's just us, you know?" "You know I'm not a racist, right?"

My response was essentially different forms of "If you're not a racist then don't act like a racist, even just with me in private." "Even if you believe you have a right to say that it's gonna get you in trouble sometime." and "No, I'm not going to forget you said it."

And variations of "No, just because black people say it doesn't mean it's okay for you to say it."

This didn't end our friendship as it was a relatively minor snag in how we otherwise got along, but he never forgot and would always backpedal and qualify and speak more carefully when he was around me. I figured in his case it was just a bunch of dick-swinging hypermasculine posturing - he came from a very poor and likely racist environment, but he dated women of all races, and I at least was happy that he never forgot that I never acceded to him and always made sure to acknowledge whenever the discussion turned even minimally toward racism; "I know you don't agree with me here..."

I no longer keep up with him, but I was rather amused to hear there was an incident several months after that with another white guy visiting our apartment who happened to be an ex-MMA fighter hopeful... My friend apparently had been drinking and made a really poorly-timed comment out of earshot about another black resident we were all friends with. A witness said my friend didn't even complete his sentence before the ex-MMA guy full-out decked him, flattening him with one punch. Karma meets face.

This is why it's good to pay attention to what your friends tell you.

He should have taken the hint when you spoke to him about it.

I worked at a community hospital. There was an LVN that was from deep East Texas.

We had a women on our floor that had lost two legs to uncontrolled diabetes... Miss LVN kept referring to her as " that little ol' Jew Woman" she even used this missive in her chart notes. After a week or so I finally decided to confront her.

She was shocked and had no idea that she was using a slur to describe this patient. UGH. I had to school her.

Good grief - that is horrifying.

This was back in the late 80's. Yes...completely horrifying!

When I was a nursing student and still learning all of the many abbreviationas for one thing and anothr, I remember being shocked one time on an adult medical floor when I saw "SOB" in a patient's chart - hadn't yet learned about shortness of breath -

She thinks she can get him to change, sigh, I have told her people don’t tend to change when they have been a certain way all their lives. I really, really wish she would wake up and break up!

I have confronted him and so has my other daughter, called him out on things he says.

I feel to remain silent is like saying I agree with him.

And I went in first ... they were moving slowly ...

And so, I was standing just in the doorway and this big (6’+) guy was inside and was calling Obama the “n” word ... I ... was just stunned and angered and I walked up to him and stated that he needed to stop that and I was terribly offended ... you could have heard a pin drop ... everyone in the whole place was staring at me ... I proceeded to ask him to produce his birth application, because I wanted to know how he got to be born white ...

then, my husband and son walked in ... and looked at me and asked what was going on ... well, I explained that this guy was offensive and owed me and everyone in the room an apology...

Hubby looks at the guy ... and the guy came over and apologized to me ... we sat down ... but I really had a hard time staying there for dinner ... the owner came over and apologized...

I guess we ordered ... but I don’t remember eating

How long ago was this? Under Obama I'm assuming. I doubt you'd get him to apologize now.

And I have confronted several more since then ... I cannot abide racists, bigots and haters

Embarrassing. But, I do not know how I move forward if I do not call it, each and every time. I am not going to tell the whole story, but it was me speaking out while in a crowd to a man with a microphone. Very hard and maybe made it worse for the black man standing next to him, simply doing his job.

I was traveling Amtrak from Seattle to Sacramento. My annual trip. This time, I needed to save some money so I decided to go coach instead of a sleeper. I boarded, sat down, pulled out my book, started to read. Somewhere south of Olympia, a family (two adults, two teen girls, speaking Spanish) boarded and sat behind me. I barely noticed them. There was a woman sitting across the aisle from me. When the train stops in Portland, there is about a half-hour layover. The family left the train. Now here's where it got weird: the woman across from me said (out loud!) You know they're illegals. I was shocked and said, what did you say? She repeated it. I asked her why she made that assumption. She said, "well, you saw them." Loudly and in my most condemning tone of voice, I said "You're just RUDE!" She never spoke to me again, and fortunately, when the family re-boarded the train, she said nothing to them, either.

I remain puzzled. I had exchanged a couple of pleasantries with her when I first sat down (hello, nice day), but nothing else, making no indication that I was interested in chatting. I can't imagine what made her believe a racist remark would be ok with me. Does she talk like that with everyone, everywhere? What the hell?

They don't want to be the only ones to feel that way, and they want to present a united front against the foreign element. If you acknowledge their fear, it could motivate them to take the next step, which would be confrontation. So it is best to do what you did: shut them down before it escalates.

It's strange how a foreign language elicits a fear response in some people. I guess the racists don't like being left out of any conversation. They want to know exactly what is being said by everyone in their vicinity. Again, I think it has to do with the feeling of belonging. If they don't understand the language, they are being left out of something.