Hypocrisy,thy name is Republican.

I am constantly gobsmacked by the level of hypocrisy that the GOP and it's base are capable of. I'm abso-fucking-lutely incapable of hypocrisy at the olympic levels my fellow countrymen and our ruling party employ. Not that I'm a perfect dude. I'm close and all, but ya know....perfect? Not so much. Even I, Ladies and Germs, have been guilty of thine own hypocrisy. Not something I'm proud of, but I's human Babies and Gentlemen. It's part of the condition. But goddamn man. These people take it to levels that rival Mt. fucking Olympus, dig? So let's begin with the definition, shall we?

hypocrisy

noun plural -sies

1. the practice of professing standards, beliefs, etc, contrary to one's real character or actual behavior, esp the pretense of virtue and piety
2. an act or instance of this

The practice of professing standards, beliefs, etc, contrary to one's real character or actual behavior. Hmm. The practice of professing standards, beliefs, etc, contrary to one's real character or actual behavior. Sound like anyone we know?

Pick a position. Pick a policy. Hell, pick a fucking principal. You ain't gonna find a one that remains true. Period. Go ahead, throw a dart at the board and you choice will reveal massive, massive hypocrisy. Shit, remember when they smeared Kerry with the "I was for it before I was against it" bullshit? These motherfuckers have turned that crap into an absolute art form. There ain't a principal they claim to hold dear that that they won't shit on it in an instant....again.

Tax cuts? Okay. During Obama's tenure the middle class tax cuts were going to sunset (I think they were passed by Bush. Don't hold me to that. I felt like reclaiming my youth so it's Southern Comfort this evening). Anyone remember where the "letting-a-taxcut-expire-is-a-tax-increase" party stood on this as Obama pushed to make it permanent? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Yeah, "The middle class really doesn't pay enough in taxes." Remember that shit? It went on for three or four days. I couldn't fucking believe it. I was the permanently high cable guy at the time. I heard it on whatever liberal talk show I was listening to. Probably Randi. I heard Republican fucking Reps and Senators spouting this shit. And O'Reilly, et all. I was just ....HOLY SHIT! And then it abruptly stopped. As if Frank fucking Luntz climbed out of whatever septic tank he was currently using for his GOP focus groups and screamed, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS DOING!?!? YOU'RE FREAKING OUT THE MORONS!

How's about foreign policy? We've all been recently schooled in this, what with the Archie Bunker Billionaire flying over seas to make googly eyes at Kim Jong Haircut. Remember how naive Obama was to say he'd meet with that asshole? Not just naive, DANGEROUS. And now they're tripping over themselves to verbally fellate the jackass in chief for getting Kim to sign promise document number what? Fucking 23 or something? Jesus Christ.

Family values? Fuck that. Although, caveat, that only applies to white christian families. As displayed recently with fucking ICE acting as Gestapo.

Strong military? Fuck that shit! Obama thinks he can get us to stop obstructing by budget sequestration. Fuck that. Full speed ahead motherfuckers, and damn the military cuts!

And of course the, of course, we can't leave out the goddamn gun nuts. Where are these assholes at? "I need my guns to defend against a tyrannical govt." Well where you at motherfucker. The President Of The United States just recently stated he could pardon himself of any criminal charges that might arise. Fuck, his evil little elf Ghoulianni just stated he could kill someone, an FBI director no less. That's investigating him. And that would be ok with you idiots. That's not tyranny to you. But being forced to buy health insurance is tantamount to Nazi fucking Germany? Or what about the oathkeepers? Remember these "I wanna play army" assholes? From their website...."Oath Keepers is a non-partisan association of current and formerly serving military, police, and first responders, who pledge to fulfill the oath all military and police take to “defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic.” Where the fuck are you assholes now! Huh? Foreign and domestic? Mmmmm-hmmmm. My itchy ass. We have a president that is a puppet of a foreign, hostile government. There is enough truth out now that if anyone should be out in the streets, it's you dicks. And your're no where to be found. My guess is, your little "about" page should read "all enemies foreign and non-caucasian domestic."

I don't get it dude. I just don't get it. How the fuck do these people look in the mirror every day? Fuck, how do they make these ridiculous leaps in logic to embrace what they despised as recently as last week? Life must suck to be them. Can't imagine standing for fuckall.