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Siwsan

(26,291 posts)
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:11 AM Jun 2018

Joy Behar has a good point. You can't shame the shameless

Although I can honestly see both sides of this public shaming situation, doing it doesn't really make the object of the shaming stop and reassess. It allows them to play the victim card.

I would walk out of a restaurant if I saw one of the generals in the army of the deplorables enter the building. And I might just put a 'bug' in their ear as I passed their table. After all, they are dining courtesy of my tax dollars.

18 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Joy Behar has a good point. You can't shame the shameless (Original Post) Siwsan Jun 2018 OP
Huckster-Bee Slanders was not the target audience. lagomorph777 Jun 2018 #1
Tell the owner why as well HAB911 Jun 2018 #2
I've already made that decision should I see someone 'open carrying' in a store Siwsan Jun 2018 #4
+++++++++++ HAB911 Jun 2018 #5
Outstanding... I've never encountered that situatioun... targetpractice Jun 2018 #13
It won't change the totally lost Phoenix61 Jun 2018 #3
I'd like to see individuals stopping by their table, interrupting the meal with their assessments Siwsan Jun 2018 #7
True true...but we've tried the go high way. Bad shit happens when good people stay silent....so NO Trek4Truth Jun 2018 #6
I agree with that. This is just one of those quandaries that plagues my brain Siwsan Jun 2018 #8
I think if it were my restaurant I'd be inclined to let her stay, but let her know up front The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2018 #9
I think the donation statement is a brilliant way to handle that situation Siwsan Jun 2018 #12
Good ideas... Make sure customers are fully informed... targetpractice Jun 2018 #16
I love it! silverweb Jun 2018 #17
I suggest empedocles Jun 2018 #10
True! FarPoint Jun 2018 #11
And you can't ask a bully to be nice for a change. Iggo Jun 2018 #14
They can play the victim card but I have no problem with public shaming/pressure/ tulipsandroses Jun 2018 #15
As soon as it is "civil" to rip children from their parents I'll give a shit about being civil Trek4Truth Jun 2018 #18

lagomorph777

(30,613 posts)
1. Huckster-Bee Slanders was not the target audience.
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:12 AM
Jun 2018

Direct actions like this inspire our side to see that when you stand up to bullies, bullies back down. Bullies are weaklings deep in their filthy souls.

HAB911

(8,915 posts)
2. Tell the owner why as well
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:14 AM
Jun 2018

same holds, for me at least, for being seated near anyone carrying a weapon

Siwsan

(26,291 posts)
4. I've already made that decision should I see someone 'open carrying' in a store
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:16 AM
Jun 2018

Even if my cart is full of frozen foods, I will abandon it, let someone on staff know where it is, find the manager and let them know why I am leaving the store.

Phoenix61

(17,019 posts)
3. It won't change the totally lost
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:15 AM
Jun 2018

But it will stop some from imitating bad behavior. It also fights against the normalization of this shit show of an administration.

Siwsan

(26,291 posts)
7. I'd like to see individuals stopping by their table, interrupting the meal with their assessments
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:21 AM
Jun 2018

Doesn't have to be loud. Doesn't have to be obvious. Just has to be disruptive to their comfort zone.

Siwsan

(26,291 posts)
8. I agree with that. This is just one of those quandaries that plagues my brain
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:23 AM
Jun 2018

I stepped off of that 'high road' the day after the orchestrated election. I just wonder if there might not be a more persistent, personal and face to face way to hammer home that what they are doing is wrong.

But, like I said - I'm in a quandary.

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,858 posts)
9. I think if it were my restaurant I'd be inclined to let her stay, but let her know up front
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:23 AM
Jun 2018

that her payment for the meal would be donated to the ACLU or some other such organization. And I'd also mentioned that, as in many restaurants, a lot of Latino people work in the kitchen, so... just sayin'...

On the other hand, I don't have a problem with public shaming in cases as egregious as this, even if the shamees are incapable of feeling shame. That's not to say I'd kick everybody out of my restaurant that I don't agree with, but if I have a sincerely held belief that it's not OK to put children in cages I'd feel free to exercise that belief and not serve them.

Siwsan

(26,291 posts)
12. I think the donation statement is a brilliant way to handle that situation
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:31 AM
Jun 2018

It is going to be interesting to see if 'Grub Hub' sees a pick up in business from people using suspiciously fake sounding names.

targetpractice

(4,919 posts)
16. Good ideas... Make sure customers are fully informed...
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:38 AM
Jun 2018

"You are welcome to eat here and spend your money, but my staff want you to know that latino and gay folks are preparing and serving your food. I will donate your check to (whatever cause) on their behalf. Enjoy your meal."

Then give great food and service. Then post a photo of their receipt (including the tip) on social media with commentary.

silverweb

(16,402 posts)
17. I love it!
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 01:21 PM
Jun 2018

This way, they are treated so very well that they can't claim discrimination or any such thing, yet the put-down is unmistakable. Posting the receipt (with tip or lack of it) and politely worded commentary on social media afterwards is key. (Let commenters post the "impolite" stuff. ;p )

I'd read the comments afterwards from those so civilly served with great interest. Useful words from my youth: "Be kind to your enemies. It confuses the hell out of them."

empedocles

(15,751 posts)
10. I suggest
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:24 AM
Jun 2018

that 'hate' is a very powerful force. Many, like the Nixon strategist who developed Nixon's Southern Strategy [sorry haven't recalled his name yet], would say 'politics is about who hates who.'

Shame may be a less powerful force for some.






FarPoint

(12,443 posts)
11. True!
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:27 AM
Jun 2018

Outrage only validates their abuse and they like it...We make no progress ..

Only hope is to vote them out.

tulipsandroses

(5,127 posts)
15. They can play the victim card but I have no problem with public shaming/pressure/
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:37 AM
Jun 2018

Lets them know the fight is on in all manners -

They've become far too comfortable with doing whatever they want while the people become complacent/defeated. I don't care if they don't change their minds. This administration will not. But they need to know that the pressure will not let up.

 

Trek4Truth

(515 posts)
18. As soon as it is "civil" to rip children from their parents I'll give a shit about being civil
Mon Jun 25, 2018, 01:23 PM
Jun 2018

to these scumbags who conceived, promoted and lied about it.

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