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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsMichael Cohen Pleads Guilty After Giuliani Offers to Be His Lawyer
EW YORK (The Borowitz Report)Michael D. Cohen decided on Tuesday to plead guilty to a host of financial crimes shortly after Rudolph Giuliani offered to be his lawyer on a pro-bono basis, Giuliani confirmed.
In an interview with Jake Tapper, on CNN, the former New York City mayor said that he had offered to give Cohen the kind of defense that only I am capable of giving.
The minute I said that, the blood drained from his face and he was out of there like a shot, Giuliani said. It was the strangest thing Id ever seen.
Giuliani gave CNN viewers a snapshot of what his defense of Cohen would have been like. I would have said, Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my client is guilty, he said. Guilty as sin! But guilty rhymes with not guilty, and thats what Im asking you to find him today. Im telling you, Jake, it would have been a killer.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/michael-cohen-pleads-guilty-after-giuliani-offers-to-be-his-lawyer?mbid=nl_Borowitz%20082118&CNDID=25394153&utm_source=Silverpop&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Borowitz%20082118&utm_content=&spMailingID=14105270&spUserID=MTMzMTgyNjg0NzM5S0&spJobID=1461907848&spReportId=MTQ2MTkwNzg0OAS2
Jarqui
(10,126 posts)"Mueller's people don't have a goddamn thing and this proves it beyond a reasonable doubt!."
"This is just a go-to-jail trap set by Mueller!!"
"It was only a bad Mar-a-Lago witches brew. That's all ..."
"The good news is unlike traitors like Brennan or McCraven, they'll be keeping their security clearances so they can to continue to help the President from behind bars!"
malaise
(269,054 posts)Rec
UTUSN
(70,711 posts)ffr
(22,670 posts)He's in on the conspiracy too.