Reimagining a classic polka for the modern age

We've all heard, and many of us have sung, this classic tune:

In heaven there is no beer.
That's why we drink it here (Right Here!)
and when we're gone from here,
our friends will be drinking all the beer!

But now we're in the Era of Trump, and I think this little ditty deserves a rewrite...

In prison there's no KFC
So go get a bucket for me
Cause when I'm locked up, you see...
You'll all eat chicken without me!