TRUMP VISITS THE QUEEN WHOSE SON HE HARDLY KNOWS

So quit saying that.

What a long exhausting day for the Queen. It started with a rumor she had died. Some say she tried to fake her death, but this cannot be verified. When Trump and Melania turned up at Buckingham Palace, they were an hour late. Her Majesty, Prince Charles and Camilla met the couple. Melania wore a stunning yellow floor length cape of invisibility. The Queen spotted Princess Anne standing in the doorway and gestured her to come join the reception line. Anne shook her head and shrugged seeming to delight in her Mum’s discomfort. Prince Charles shook Trump’s hand and immediately raised his middle finger to his nose to scratch it.

Trump denied knowing Prince Andrew in spite of being seen with him, Melania, Epstein and Ghislaine at a “Pimps and Hookers” Party where all came in costume as themselves.

At the reception for the world leaders, Trudeau, Macron, the Dutch Prime Minister and Princess Anne amused themselves as they discussed Trump’s many social blunders or faux pas on a hot mic.

Meanwhile in the USA, the Congressional Judiciary Committee questioned the Constitutional grounds for impeaching Trump by asking four prominent law professors (the GOP witness seemingly a graduate of Trump University) to explain the rationale for embarking on such an endeavor. One explained the difference between a president and a king by saying Trump could name his child Barron but he could not MAKE him a baron. Same for the naming of First Ladies. Mrs. Trump went on Twitter to demand an apology. Afterwards, she re-decorated the White House Christmas trees with used condoms.

Back across the Atlantic, Trump on hearing that the other NATO leaders were laughing at him behind his back, called a press conference to call Trudeau two-faced and stomped out to leave the conference early. The world laughing helped propel Air Force One across the Atlantic.

PHOTOS: Prince Andrew We Hardly Knew Ye