Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search
 

packman

(16,296 posts)
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 09:50 AM Mar 2020

"Poof" - God is commanded to end the virus




Apparently the Coronavirus was wiped off the face of the earth Sunday by televangelist Kenneth Copeland, somewhere around 12 eastern.

Source: Friendly Atheist
Televangelist Kenneth Copeland, who said last week that God told him the coronavirus would “be over much sooner than you think” (but still wants you to tithe even if you’ve lost your job), offered up what I can only assume is a magic spell this morning in order to destroy COVID-19.

And that’s why the pandemic is now over.
(It’s not over.)

Copeland screamed out at Satan to “get off this nation” and “crawl on your belly,” before declaring the crisis to be “over.”
That will no doubt scare the virus into submission.

Invoking a scene straight out of the movie THE EXORCIST, Copeland thus spoke:

In the name of Jesus, standing in the office of the prophet of God, I execute judgment on you, COVID-19! I execute judgment on you, Satan! You destroyer! You killer! You get out! You would break your power! You get off this nation! I demand judgment on you! I demand — I demand — I demand a vaccination to come immediately
!
I call you dark! I call you doggone! You come down… from your place of authority! Destroyer! You come down and you crawl on your belly, like God commanded you when He put His foot on your head in the Garden of Eden. You will destroy through COVID-19 no more!
It! Is! Finished! It! Is! Over!

And the United States of America is healed and well again.



https://crooksandliars.com/2020/03/televangelist-declares-coronavirus
13 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies

karynnj

(59,504 posts)
1. Sadly, he may do this Sunday after Sunday -- and lo and behold, the crisis will begin to ease
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 09:55 AM
Mar 2020

Even though that will be because of what the medical professions do, what the Governors do and what the (hopefully) majority of people do by self isolating, he and his flock will see it as the result of their prayers.

ProfessorGAC

(65,060 posts)
4. It's My Fault
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:03 AM
Mar 2020

And your fault. We didn't have enough "faith" and ruined it for everyone!
You know that's going to be the excuse when the virus doesn't magically go away.
"If only every American had my faith..."

The Magistrate

(95,247 posts)
7. True, Sir
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:10 AM
Mar 2020

It is the all purpose excuse.

The old pagan view was at least a little more realistic. A god might be weakened by lack of sacrifice and ritual, and so lose the power to protect the people and the city.

This peculiar strain of monotheism our culture has adopted claims a deity is so affronted by lack of worshipful obedience he uses his power to punish rather than to protect.

I have always been fond of an old practice that used to be seen in China. One measure against drought, where prayer and ritual had not yet seemed to work, was to take the god out of his temple and leave the image in the sun, to acquaint the god with just how dire the situation was....

The Magistrate

(95,247 posts)
10. A Proof The Prophet Isaiah Would Have Readily Undertaken, Sir
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:16 AM
Mar 2020

Or perhaps Elijah, it has been a while. The one who we are told challenged the priests of Ba'al to summon the fire to burn their sacrifice, and when they failed, doused his slaughtered bullock in water before praying successfully for fire from heaven....

SWBTATTReg

(22,130 posts)
12. A good suggestion, but I don't think you'll have to. Eventually someone will get it and spread ...
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:26 AM
Mar 2020

it to all of the other members of the church body. It's just a matter of time where a substantial portion of the group will come down w/ the CV.

It's happened already in France, S. Korea, and probably other places where churches continue to meet w/ their
large congregations (over 10 per federal guidelines, over 50 some other guidelines), all crammed together in one big happy family, coughing and hacking on each other, or just even breathing in close quarters. What really irks me about this is that they are putting the entire community at risk, not just them.

The local hospitals will eventually be overwhelmed, due to the actions of this irresponsible twits.

Submariner

(12,504 posts)
2. Well, Kenny has a new jet plane to chase his god around the planet,
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:02 AM
Mar 2020

so who would know better than MasterCard, VISA, and Discover card Kenny, one of gods go to assh*les for bible speak. These phony jesus freaks are getting irritating now.

‘Word from the Lord’: Televangelist’s ministry buys Tyler Perry’s Gulfstream jet

Read more here: https://www.kansascity.com/news/nation-world/article195841759.html#storylink=cpy

gratuitous

(82,849 posts)
6. Copeland is setting God up to take the fall
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:05 AM
Mar 2020

When the disease continues to spread, will Copeland put the hat on the Almighty for failing to carry out his orders?

defacto7

(13,485 posts)
11. I hope these people keep making fools of themselves.
Tue Mar 31, 2020, 10:21 AM
Mar 2020

Eventually because of the scope of the pandemic many are bound to see the foolishness of it and scorn the day they ever believed. I think younger generations will get the point. I'm hopeful anyway.

Latest Discussions»General Discussion»"Poof" - God is commanded...