I guess I will have to make do with a sling.

Might make us conspicuous.

I think we should get rid of school buildings and hold classes in a tank. It offers protection and fire power . Small class sizes too.

Kids don't go to school, the school goes to them.

Brilliant!

It serves so many purposes. Protection, fire power, small class sizes, removes them from the battlefield. Field trips would be a blast. Never have to leave the classroom for transportation. I never thought that classes, inside of a military tool of destruction, could be such a good idea. Talk about multi-functional.

So sez the NRA.

How are you going to conceal THAT!

But, that might be too big, so get a 9mm and discuss the Luger and the Nazis.

If you fit the projectile with wide fins, it will penetrate intruders and then the impact will continue to push backwards. Just point it at the doorway, and when someone comes in unexpectedly, they'll be killed and removed from the classroom in the blink of an eye.

In fact, you can rig the system to fire when the door is opened! Hands-free protection! Perfect for late students and those unannounced principal visits.

Kid acts up you pull out your gun and blast them right between the eyes. With water.

The WTF look would be priceless.

so I'm going for mustard gas myself - no worrying about aim and a bit more portable...off to dig a trench.

I think I'd choose the Nock seven barrel volley gun. Or maybe I'll just bring Richard Sharpe and Patrick Harper along to every class. Maybe the Chosen Men, too . . . then I wouldn't have to carry anything.