House Science Committee Questions Existence of Meteors - Shocking Borowitz report
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—The chairman of the House Committee on Science, Space, and Technology said today that the committee would hold hearings next week “to settle the question, once and for all, of whether meteors exist.”
“The media has been in something of a frenzy recently on this whole topic of meteors,” said chairman Lamar Smith (R-Texas). “I think it’s irresponsible of them to frighten the public about something that, at the end of the day, may be about as real as unicorns.”
Rep. Smith said that he had seen recent reports of the “so-called Russian meteor” of last week, but added, “Maybe it’s the scientific skeptic in me, but this ‘meteor’ may just have been a bunch of fireworks that some Siberian fellow set off after drinking a little too much Stoli.
It is winter, after all, and that’s how those folks keep warm.”
The Texas congressman said that he and other meteor doubters are worried that scientists had “a vested interest” in convincing people that meteors are real: “They want the government to spend more money on science, and, let me tell you, that is the last thing the Science Committee is going to do.”
As for the scientific theory that meteors may have killed the dinosaurs, Rep. Smith chuckled, “That theory would also have us believe that there were dinosaurs.”
Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/02/house-science-committee-questions-existence-of-meteors.html#ixzz2LB1ldqhm
= new reply since forum marked as read
TYY 
Sid
Borowitz is posted here quite often, tho. Keep an eye out for his stuff. A lot of it is really good.
Sid
I honestly thought it was an Onion article. Unbelievable. 
only outlaws will have meteors
White House Vaporizes Death Star Petition
An estimated $850 quadrillion effort to add a “Death Star” similar to the one seen in “Star Wars” to the United States’ military arsenal would be too costly and doomed to failure. This according to the Obama administration which on Saturday officially rejected a citizen petition calling for the White House to “secure resources and funding, and begin construction of a Death Star by 2016.”
In an official response to the petition, which has so far gathered more than 34,000 signatures, the White House said that while the creation of a Death Star would likely spur job growth and bolster national defense, it’s generally a bad idea.
“The Administration does not support blowing up planets,” Paul Shawcross, chief of the Science and Space Branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget, wrote — tongue firmly in cheek. “Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?”
Indeed. Probably would have been better off starting out small and asking for a Millennium Falcon …
More details at link:
http://allthingsd.com/20130112/white-house-vaporizes-death-star-petition/
Give it up, GOP. Sure, it's hard trying new things. Learn to play chess instead of Global Thermonuclear War.
