I think the writer is projecting. Must be too much "blinge".

on edit: lmao at the comments:

I love the "ANIMALLUMINATI"! I wonder if that super-mega pod of dolphins was a sign of the animapocalypse caused by the animallumiati?

animapocalypse! And here I was SURE it was gonna be zombies!

omg thats hilarious! Theres nothing like a good B horror movie. This ones a must-see!

I wouldn't want to visit NZ again! Traumatized by herds of sheep on the rolling hills

No words are necessary

http://avon-oh.patch.com/blog_posts/council-get-er-done-please

Dear Council:

I have watched the cable channel and have seen your concern that something be done regarding the overpopulation of deer. It has been two mating seasons for deer, however, and I am still waiting to have these deer culled.

The overpopulation of deer is a safety issue. Council and the City of Avon Lake is on alert that deer are a safety issue and this city is responsible for doing nothing.

This week Jan.4 more than 10 deer stopped traffic walking across Walker Roads from the apple orchard on the south of Walker Road to the American Legion directly across the street on the north by Giant Eagle. It was with much distress that these deer walked across the road rather than scatter to cars and hurt or kill drivers who were stopped waiting for these idiot animals to get off the road.

Then a day later, five deer ran across the same road in the same place! Finally, Sunday in the same area one deer walked up the ditch and stood by the edge of the road and stopped traffic for almost 10 minutes while drivers waited to see if the deer would cross the street or come at them. This deer scattered back to the ditch.

The three incidents in one week were not coincidence as much as usual happenings in this specific area. SOMEONE IS GOING TO GET KILLED! I have had two cars damaged by these deer.

Council must, must do something as someone is going to get killed. With the many senior citizens, new teen drivers and travelers unaware of the deer along our roads, the need to kill deer is now.

Please begin this process now.

After I sent this email to council on January 7, two more separate incidents of a herd of deer crossed both Lear Road and again on Walker Road. Vehicles were held up with many, like me, hoping that these dumb animals did not run to our cars as is very often the case. Deer are dumb animals, kill humans, destroy vegetation and spread disease--please get rid of them as Mentor is doing today!


So arm yourselves with all the guns you cam because those damned deer are arming themselves and they're looking for blood....HUMAN BLOOD!!!

Dave

10:28 am on Thursday, January 17, 2013

I say ticket the deer for causing a dangerous condition on the road. And remember "deer kill humans!!"

You stupid, ignorant ugly bag of water. Who in the hell told you that humans are better than the rest of the animal kingdom?

Watch Saturday Night Live season 5 episode 19. I can't find the video of the deer crossing by itself. Here's a quick transcript.



79s: Steve Martin / 3-D, Paul & Linda McCartney

Deer Crossing

Deer #1.....Steve Martin
Deer #2....Gilda Radner
Cow.....Garrett Morris
Deer #3.....Bill Murray
Female Motorist.....Jane Curtin
Male Motorist.....Al Franken
Deer #4.....Tom Davis


[ open on Deer Crossing sign at the edge of an interstate highway, as two deer standing on hind legs run forward ]

[ they watch and wait as the sound of cars zoom by, then make an effort to cross the interstate while no cars are passing ]

[ suddenly, they quickly turn back as the sound of a passing car fast approaches ]

[ they make another attempt to cross, but run back when they see a car coming ]

[ just then, a cow wanders in on two hind legs ]

Cow: Moooooo! Say... excuse me! But do you know if there might be a Cattle Crossing near?

Deer #1: [ pointing with his hoof ] Uh -- there's one about a mile up the road. But you're welcome to cross here, if you'd like.

Cow: Noooooooooo, that's okay! Thank you!

[ the cow slowly ambles off ]

Deer #1: Take care! [ to his fellow deer ] Boy, was he lost! Can you believe that!

[ they watch cars zoom past ]

Deer #1: Now, normally I would have crossed here... but since you're with me, I'd rather not.

Deer #2: Thank you, Deer!

[ a third Deer hops forward on his hind legs ]

Deer #3: Been waiting long?

Deer #2: Yeah. It's pretty bad today.

Deer #1: I don't know how they picked this spot. It's a pretty ridiculous place for a Deer Crossing.

Deer #3: [ chuckling ] Yeah, well, I can't wait all day. I'm going.

Deer #2: Don't! Are you crazy?

Deer #3: [ chuckling ] Look, they have to stop! Right? It's a Deer Crossing! I'm out of here!

[ he hops across the street ]

Deer #1: [ calling out ] I don't think they have to stop!

[ suddenly, a car slams on its brakes and screeches along the road, as it collides with the dear ]

Female Motorist: Oh, honey! Couldn't you stop?!

Male Motorist: It shot right out in front of me! Come on, let's go!

[ they slam their doors and pull away, as more traffic passes at a rapid pace ]

[ the two deer continue to watch for an opening, as a fourth deer bounds forward on its two hind legs, looks sadistically at the first two deer, then hops right onto the interstate without looking ]

[ he can be heard getting clipped by a car, and momentarily returns to the other two deer, clutching his side and gasping as he retreats into the woods ]

Deer #2: Do you think maybe we ought to come back later?

Deer #1: [ he observes passing traffic for a moment ] Let's go find a salt lick on the other side of the road.

[ they turn and walk back into the woods ]

[ fade ]

stupid stupid woman

Homo sapiens species have displayed this deficiencies.

That makes me wonder how many of them know our species designation ... or if it would make them think it's some fancy librul term for homosexuals.

only our local rag has no comment feature. They tried it for a while, and didn't like the comments.

On some routs we make tunnels under the highway for critters to get to the other side safely.
Theirs that sign post up ahead. It says ' Animal crossing'!
In effect it says 'use tunnel or become extinct'.
It is still unclear if the critters could read the warning or if the ones that survived to propagate just used the tunnel to avoid large dangerous things that move fast.
As to our 'red footed friends'.
Theirs that sign post up ahead. It says 'Think'!
In effect it says, 'if you don't stop mindlessly Paul parroting you're masters you will become extinct'.

Kathleen; I hate to be the one to tell you this, but it's beginning to look like the critters are smarter than republicans.

And take her to task on her previous anti-deer letters.

One of the comments asked her if she had any idea how expensive whale blinge is.

That water is pretty damn cold. I tell you what, though, it takes a hell of a long time to knit those sweaters.

Michael E

4:31 pm on Saturday, February 16, 2013

The problem you aren't addressing is the continued reduction in education spending. If your Republican representatives would restore funding to public schools, then these deer can get back into the classrooms and start learning English. Deer do not have the money to go to private schools, and the more we reduce public school funding, the more accidents we are going to see caused by illiterate deer. If you want to know why the cost of healthcare is rising, it's not Obamacare, but under educated deer, and that, my dear, rests on your shoulders.

am, am, am, I just can't stop laughing. Years ago I would have said no one is that dumb, but with the discourse of the last 8 years I'm seriously worried about the level of intelligence of the citizens of the US. Not everyone, just the repub/teahadists/right wing.

I had to read it twice, but I think I got it now! My dog can't read deer crossing signs, so I need to eat him when I get hungry and then run out to buy jewelry for seals? For a follow up article, please let me know the most appropriate place to buy for seals. Jared's? I'm going to run outside and fire up the grill for some real hot dogs.

Jared's needs a deer commercial. tT!

It's astounding that this person thought he had an argument so good he should release it to the rest of the world. People like this are not reachable, incorrigible.

Obama’s going to take your house, your car and anything you might have more of than the other guy or gal. Sad. Very sad, too, that 23 million Americans are without a job. They probably don’t have any stuff and are just praying for a place to sleep and eat. Infuriating, too, that under Obama for the first time in 100 years America’s credit rating has been downgraded. How did this happen? Obama promised “If I don’t fix the economy in three years, then I’ll be a one-term president." Instead Obama’s promises focused on Obamacare with its taxes, death panels, abortions and doctors answering to government rather than patients. Obama dolled out-- free cell phones, lots of entitlements, lies, and added his handpicked czars free from America’s Constitution ensuring no one branch of government becomes too powerful.

Now, pack up and hide your stuff cause Obama is going to take it. Maybe not this moment, but he’s coming after what you’ve worked to earn. Obama has his believers who think that they are entitled to America’s stuff. Each believer is waiting for Obama’s second term. It will be the end of America as we loved its capitalism. The lines will form to dole out all that cash from “ the rich“ who Obama seems to hate (yet he’s a millionaire). Are you prepared to protect your stuff from these entitlement lines?

Right now, King Obama’s edict is that he’s going to take some from the rich to give to the other folks. Obama defines these “rich” now as those who earn $250,000. Why $250,000 and not $450,000 or $95,000? If he is elected another four years, heaven forbid, his edict could change.

But the stuff? If this president plans to take from the rich to give to other folks, what else is possible? Why not cars, houses, land, trucks, boats, jewelry? You might own something the other guy doesn’t. No doubt you worked for it. You had your American Dream and saved and sacrificed till it became yours. What happens if the other folks don’t have stuff? Obama’s plan to share the wealth might not end at cash.

It reads like it was written by a (not particularly bright) twelve year old.

They must be hard up for writers to resort to publishing this.

It's a fascinating read.

It started with an allegedly real caller to a radio program complaining that those iconic Deer Crossing signs are attracting deer to those areas.

IMO the current op-ed is either a riff on that original complaint or is a deliberate hoax.

a sundress but he won't wear it...what can I do?

Animals don't think, so how can your seal refuse to wear that dress? Seems to me dressing your seal should be as easy as dressing a manikin

Just don't blow a seal

that he exists solely for human benefit. Tragic, really.

we could get some seal re-education camps set up? Obviously, they need to be taught they are here only for our benefit. There's bound to be teachers out there of the manikin vocations willing to teach these ignorant seals...

"Snakes can't read those "Don't tread on me" flags, either. We need to stop making those, too"

Just sayin'.

It's a "two-fer".

the simplistic perspective expressed I just- haha wow.

The dumbest thing I have ever read. She makes absolutely no sense at all.

not an actual newspaper, but a series of local websites. Some of these are actually good. Newtown, CT's, for instance, got slammed with hits after the shooting.

This one, not so much.