You rascal! You finally did it. I knew you could, Walmart! Congratulations.

Maybe someday, we will honor this great feat, in our beloved, Corporate America, by naming the planet after you. After all, why stop with the number one spot on the charts that matters even more than people when it comes to our most cherished values.

Let me be the first to propose it! Since, eventually, Walmart and its Corporate buddies, will eventually cover most of the Earth with themselves, why not: Planet Walmart. Think of the potential trading value should we ever be visited other civilizations who, if they are advanced, will also be owned and run by corporations. The Universe has to be a mega-corporation, right?

Now, get your party hats on Walmart, and celebrate. The Fortune 500 is what matters most in our country.

"The United States of Walmart"
"The Walmarty way"

My daughter calls it Wally Hell

Next up: the crushing economy, and why Dollar General and big box stores like Walmart don't need no stinking internet sales tax.

If they paid their employees well, those precious billions of theirs (which they don't do anything with - they don't pay taxes or their employees and sit on those billions and let them collect interest) would be far less.