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mountain grammy

(26,624 posts)
Fri May 24, 2013, 11:19 PM May 2013

Scalia resigns as scoutmaster, Boy Scouts around the world rejoice!

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, who for the past forty-seven years has served as a weekend scoutmaster for the Boy Scouts of America, angrily resigned from that position yesterday, effective immediately.

Justice Scalia quit his post in a terse resignation letter that read, in part:

“Some of the happiest memories of my adult life have been as a scoutmaster. Huddling under blankets around the campfire, and so forth. But now, all of that has been ruined. Ruined.”


Shortly after sending the letter, Justice Scalia destroyed his scoutmaster uniform in the blazing fireplace of his Supreme Court office.

Later, he went across the hall to share his decision with his close confidant on the Court, Justice Clarence Thomas, telling him, “There’s nowhere I feel safe anymore, Clarence. The military? The N.B.A.? Nowhere. I guess the only place I still feel safe is the Supreme Court. This is still a safe place, isn’t it?”

Justice Thomas said nothing in reply.



http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/05/scalia-resigns-post-as-scoutmaster.html

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Scalia resigns as scoutmaster, Boy Scouts around the world rejoice! (Original Post) mountain grammy May 2013 OP
Cool beans! Brother Buzz May 2013 #1
I hope he resigns from being a judge! hrmjustin May 2013 #2
Borowitz has a twisted sense of humor nadinbrzezinski May 2013 #3
And the BSA became a better organization for his absence. LostOne4Ever May 2013 #4
The Borowitz Report is like The Currant and The Onion - all three are SATIRE Tx4obama May 2013 #7
Well one can always hope LostOne4Ever May 2013 #8
Borowitz. Thank God! I was afraid it was real. Buzz Clik May 2013 #5
I thought it was true until I read the last paragraph and sentence.. mountain grammy May 2013 #6
He broke up Bill O'Reilly's marriage! jberryhill May 2013 #9
Are Antonin and Bill having a fling? Come on, Onion! mountain grammy May 2013 #10

LostOne4Ever

(9,289 posts)
4. And the BSA became a better organization for his absence.
Fri May 24, 2013, 11:26 PM
May 2013

Good Riddance! He won't be missed!

Here is hoping he leaves the SCotUS next!

Tx4obama

(36,974 posts)
7. The Borowitz Report is like The Currant and The Onion - all three are SATIRE
Fri May 24, 2013, 11:49 PM
May 2013

I also hope he leaves the SCotUS soon too


Edited to add the missing word 'hope'

LostOne4Ever

(9,289 posts)
8. Well one can always hope
Fri May 24, 2013, 11:53 PM
May 2013

But thanks for correcting me. I never heard of it before. I saw that it was from the New Yorker and assumed it was true.

Thanks again

 

Buzz Clik

(38,437 posts)
5. Borowitz. Thank God! I was afraid it was real.
Fri May 24, 2013, 11:27 PM
May 2013

It may be real anyway, but I'm clinging to the hope he isn't that insane.

mountain grammy

(26,624 posts)
6. I thought it was true until I read the last paragraph and sentence..
Fri May 24, 2013, 11:35 PM
May 2013

then I thought no, but I'm still not convinced it's not real. I could completely believe it. The man's a fox quoting jerk.

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