Spam and homeless people

The is is story about one of my serial spammers. Undoubtedly, you all have stories of such individuals and your attempts to get off their email lists. Feel free to post your stories.

Anyway here's mine: For years, I received emails as the member of a mother's group in UK (12 members maybe). Naturally, I attempted to inform them I was not whomever they believed me to be. Eventually of course, I started to get to know the group. Their baby stories, their book club meeting times, the shopping expeditions. Then one day, they cut me from their list. No more chatty group emails. Forward to a year or two ago, and suddenly I am on some college's email list and am getting parent information including at times links to grades, etc. At the bottom of the emails is a message warning me not to read, copy, forward the emails if they do not belong to me and to contact them which I attempt to do. If memory serves, I was friendly at first. A polite note. Never acknowledged. And then more email about my child at the college. So I had started trying to imitate Monty Python in my replies. They ignored them.

I berated their sports team first ridiculing them for claiming to have a football team. Made comments about the royal family. A series of lame stupid responses to their emails. Ignored.
Anyway, today they sent me a message saying there was an event for parents and the students would have dinner and a movie. So I responded that I would post the invitation at every homeless shelter in their community and thanked them.

You know where this is going, don't you?

I had a reply within minutes of sending that email saying they were not certain what I was talking about. So like Arlo Guthrie in "Alice's Restaurant," I proceeded to tell the story of my futile attempts to get off their spam list. And asked again to be removed. The response was they were sorry I felt that way, and if I would identify the student I was associated with at the school they would be glad to remove me from their spam list. This email also was cc'd to their campus security. At this point I informed them my family had not lived in their country since 1840, and that I had no idea what twit at their school had any affiliation with me! I could feel the CCTVs turning in my direction for a better look!

So lesson learned? Always invite the homeless when you want to scare the gentry.