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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsJohn Boehner fan fiction: pretty funny!
http://www.salon.com/2013/10/17/inside_the_mind_of_john_boehner_three_novelists_imagine_the_shutdowns_final_hours/Sixteen days. They think I dont know that? I can count. Sixteen days. Thats about 600 cigarettes. More, maybe. Im not gonna do the math. There are enough people spouting shutdown numbers. A man smokes more when hes up shits creek
but I have a paddle. I have a gavel. The gavel.
They want me to cry theyre all just waiting for me to cry. Here comes little Johnny and his overactive tear ducts, letting the Democrats beat him up. Boehner is the weakest speaker in history. Boehners a coward. Boehner just wants to drink his Merlot. Boehner just wants to hit the links and work on his tan.
I hear what theyre saying. I have ears I have feelings. Im a human being. Id like to see them try to deal with this mess. Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right here I am Go ahead and create your little video clips, Jon Stewart. Have your liberal laugh But does a coward help raise his 11 siblings? Does a coward work his way through college? Does a coward survive an attempted coup by his own caucus? Im still here. Im still standing.
Why? Because I put up a fight. Because the Tea Party knows Im not a pushover. Because the American people dont want Obamacare because the American people want fairness for all for ALL. This is democracy. I have the gavel! The gavel is mine!
They want me to cry theyre all just waiting for me to cry. Here comes little Johnny and his overactive tear ducts, letting the Democrats beat him up. Boehner is the weakest speaker in history. Boehners a coward. Boehner just wants to drink his Merlot. Boehner just wants to hit the links and work on his tan.
I hear what theyre saying. I have ears I have feelings. Im a human being. Id like to see them try to deal with this mess. Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right here I am Go ahead and create your little video clips, Jon Stewart. Have your liberal laugh But does a coward help raise his 11 siblings? Does a coward work his way through college? Does a coward survive an attempted coup by his own caucus? Im still here. Im still standing.
Why? Because I put up a fight. Because the Tea Party knows Im not a pushover. Because the American people dont want Obamacare because the American people want fairness for all for ALL. This is democracy. I have the gavel! The gavel is mine!
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John Boehner fan fiction: pretty funny! (Original Post)
The Velveteen Ocelot
Oct 2013
OP
kydo
(2,679 posts)1. LOL
nolabear
(41,990 posts)2. Fifty Shades of Orange.
monmouth3
(3,871 posts)3. Where the hell is Elaine Stritch to sing "I'm Still Here." She'd kick Boner right in the a$$..n/t
IrishAyes
(6,151 posts)4. I followed the link and read everything.
If I have nightmares tonight, it's all your fault!