I was 25 and I owned a "hot" sports car. Several of us did. We were convinced it made us more likely to get pulled over for stuff. They always had a reason for pulling you over, and the drill was always the same, some "warning" of some sort and off we went.

One of the guys was late to work one morning. "I got pulled over" he said. That on the surface didn't seem enough for him to be as late as he was. He explained that he got pulled over, pulled OUT, frisked, and then stood there for 10 minutes why the guy "ran his plates". No ticket mind you.

"Whadya do?" I asked. He looked at me like the most clueless guy in the room (okay,because I probably WAS the most clueless guy in the room) and said:

"I don't HAVE to do anything. That's just the way it goes".

He goes on to explain how common this is and how often these things happen. I respond with,

"I'd be pissed".

To which he responded, "Then you'd be dead".

Yes, he was black, and I'm not, and the older I've gotten the more I've understood how clueless I was, and how little hyperbole he was expressing.

All of us who don't look "exactly right" have some experience with it and made the adjustment.

I won't go into some restaurants unless I'm going with people who are white. I've done it both ways and the service and food was horrible when it was just our family. We're talking about 4 or 5 star restaurants.

And there are situations which have occurred where my friends have asked me why I didn't stand up for myself. I tried that too in the past and know what to expect. People just wait for you to open your mouth just to put you in your place. It doesn't matter how right you are.

And of course, there was the time when I got pulled over for inspections EVERY TIME I went through the Ft. Lauderdale airport.

But, yes, it's hardest on black Americans.

That's exactly it.

Bigots by nature have spectacularly effective moral blind spots, so much so that they absolutely could not care less how in the wrong they really are. "The sky is yellow," they'd correct you, happily. And they would be so crazily smug about it.

Bigots wear their shield of willful moral ignorance like a favorite sweater, the more you point out the holes the more they smile and hug themselves for wearing it.

It's why they always, always act like they've done nothing wrong. It's not an act, they believe it, because believing makes them happy in ways little else can.

but that their actions could even be questioned is unthinkable. They will tear down anyone that could provide evidence that their reputation is anything but spotless. It's a sign of weakness in their ranks if you score points suggesting otherwise, so they make sure you never do.

It's the pack mentality that's intimidating. When they have other good ole boys who will stand up for them when you know they're all complicit in the same misbehavior. And if there's a lawyer in their circle, there's more to fear since anyone can take you down with a frivolous lawsuit.

That's why the legal agencies are complicit in supporting this way of life, when they do nothing.

Thanks for the thread, SoCalDem.

Heartbreaking.

So many false and dangerous narratives, makes it hard for parents trying to locate their child in this universe through truth, love, reason, compassion, all those good things. How do you explain this ugliness? And in a way that allows their getting along with schoolmates laboring under false narratives?

Our child is 6. We've begun some discussions, that will evolve over the years, and we focus hugely on critical reasoning skills for the monkey. And it all feels too little, for the amount of ugly BS out there.

sitting here at work. I've known so many black people in my 45 years of work. Drank and partied with them, baby sat their kids, and etc. It just makes me sad.

the president, hoping for another "Gates" situation. The president handled it with class. How do we think R-Money would have handled it?



Hmmm....

Especially questions that are important.

They'll go on at length about the sports team of a school they attended 40 years ago (even though most probably never attended a game while there), but anything of significance to the daily lives of the people they pretend to care about???bupkis...

My father warned me that with cops it should always be "yes sir" and "no sir".

I have since learned additional rules: 1. never call the cops, 2. never give consent to a search, 3. never talk to the cops without a lawyer present.

everyone. I live in Seattle where far too many cops are corrupt, violent and lie with impunity, but the same probably holds true in most police departments.

I used to work with "at risk youth", and that was my unsolicited advice. Try to be polite to everyone, especially people with guns, and don't forget, the police always have guns.
As a a white MAN, I believe that if I'm reasonably polite to people, I can go just about anywhere in these United States 24/7. To me, that is white (male) privilege.
Its not right that my wife doesn't feel safe in a parking ramp at night, nor is it right that adolescents of color are often assumed to be dangerous, but it is what it is.
We all have to look beyond our stereotypes.
Most kids in the "hood" are good, and then there are polite white males like Ted Bundy, who was not.
We have a duty to tell our children some ugly facts, and we have a duty to try to change those ugly facts as best we can.