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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsMississippi Sex Ed Class Compares Women to Dirty Pieces of Chocolate
By Amanda Hess
In Mississippi, 76 percent of teenagers will have sex before they leave high school. But until this yearwhen the state finally implemented a policy requiring schools to teach sexual education in classmany teachers refused to discuss the topic with students. Now, some parents are worried that Mississippis new sex ed curriculum is more damaging than just not saying anything at all.
According to the Los Angeles Times, teachers in Oxford, Miss., are asking students to unwrap a piece of chocolate, pass it around class and observe how dirty it became. Says Marie Barnard, a public health worker and parent: They're using the Peppermint Pattie to show that a girl is no longer clean or valuable after she's had sexthat she's been used.
That shouldn't be the lesson we send kids about sex.
Comparing women to disposable foods or personal hygiene items is an old abstinence-only scare tactic thats still occasionally passed off as education in schools around the country. Last year, a school district in Texas instructed teachers to compare people who have had sex to dirty toothbrushes and sticks of gum. People want to marry a virgin, just like they want a virgin toothbrush or stick of gum, the guide read. Kidnapping victim turned advocate Elizabeth Smart spoke out against this damaging analogy last year, saying:
I remember in school one time, I had a teacher who was talking about abstinence. And she said, Imagine youre a stick of gum. When you engage in sex, thats like getting chewed. And if you do that lots of times, youre going to become an old piece of gum, and who is going to want you after that? Well, thats terrible. No one should ever say that. But for me, I thought, Im that chewed-up piece of gum. Nobody re-chews a piece of gum. You throw it away. And thats how easy it is to feel you no longer have worth. Your life no longer has value.
more
http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2014/04/03/mississippi_sex_ed_class_compares_women_to_dirty_peppermint_patties.html?
joeybee12
(56,177 posts)I doubt the tiny little minds of those teachers in Oxford realize how phucking sexist this is.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)things with crevices and folds retain the manly essence poured into them. Forever.
This is how these people approach sexuality.....
joeybee12
(56,177 posts)sleep around and no one says anything, but a woman, 19 or 20 mistakes and right away she's a tramp!
That said, these people are idiots.
LuvNewcastle
(16,856 posts)and spoiled wieners.
RainDog
(28,784 posts)women as much as men have held this standard, esp. in regard to religion.
As a woman, I wasn't interested in marrying someone until I knew we were sexually compatible. I had sons, not daughters, but if I had had daughters I would've taught them to wait to have sex until they are older, just as I taught my sons, would've made sure she had access to EFFECTIVE birth control and knew she was expected to use it - just as I taught my sons - and I would've told her sexual happiness is a good and important part of life, so she shouldn't be in any relationship that wasn't sexually fulfilling to her as part of a relationship (obviously things can change, ppl can have health probs, etc, but I mean to say I don't support the idea of waiting until after marriage to know if you're sexually happy with someone.
I would've also talked to my daughter about the value of masturbation so that she could learn about her own body first.
Obviously no religious right wingers will be asking me to teach sex ed... lol.
Funny thing, tho, I did teach sex ed as a student. I was the youngest in the class, a virgin, and got visual aids for free from Planned Parenthood. I got stuck with the topic b/c no one else wanted to do it (we all had to teach a section in biology for different systems.)
mike_c
(36,281 posts)Seriously. "People want to marry a virgin." Really?
DUers, a show of hands please. How many of you gave a rat's buttocks whether your partner was a virgin or not before you partnered with them? How many asked? That's some of the craziest nonsense I've ever heard. Is there a single person who said "Whoa-- I mean, I love you and all, but damn! Not a virgin? I'm outa' here!" Anyone want to own up to that? For real?
Vogon_Glory
(9,128 posts)My concern about marrying a virgin would be my serious concern that my partner-to-be would have ZERO interest in sex. Marriages where one partner has a libido and the other doesn't can either be severely strained or lead to adultery, neither of which outcomes uphold an ideal of 'the sanctity of marriage.'
sendero
(28,552 posts)... wouldn't want a virgin. First, I don't want to have to teach her everything. Second, every woman I have spoken to on this subject said that her first time was horrible and why would I want to be that guy?
These folks with these sexually repressed attitudes are merely a reminder of the validity of the adage "chastity is its own punishment". I doubt that their lame attempts to scare people away from sexual expression are having much of an impact. Last I heard the "abstinence only" crowd had the highest teen pregnancy rate. Go figure.
MrScorpio
(73,631 posts)I never dated a virgin when I was younger either.
I never got the fixation over virgins. They seemed like too much trouble to deal with.
Vogon_Glory
(9,128 posts)If Bible-Belt red states were such citadels of righteousness, g*dliness, and chastity, surely these teachings would show up as places with the lowest teen pregnancy and lowest STD rates in the country.
But Mississippi, Texas, and Arkansas rate among the states having the HIGHEST, not the lowest rates of teen pregnancy and STD rates in the country. A rational person would say that evidence of Blue-State sin is covered up by accessible abortion is rather lacking, but logic and rationality among Bible-Belt Republicans is sorely lacking.
Ken Burch
(50,254 posts)"If Bible-Belt Red States Were Such Citadels of Piety, Tennessee Williams, Carson McCullers, William Faulkner, and Flanner O'Connor wouldn't had anything to write about".
Vogon_Glory
(9,128 posts)That might not have worked. You and I might be culturally-aware enough to know who those writers are and what content their novels, plays, and short stories might have, but I doubt the boneheads who developed and implemented such "traditional values" sex ed curricula have enough awareness to know much more than McCullers, Williams, and Faulkner were writers, and would probably conflate McCullers with Lillian Hellman.
A curricula based on wishful thinking and ignoring unpleasant and inconvenient truths, inflicted on the hapless schoolchildren of Mississipi with ghastly consequences.
ck4829
(35,091 posts)You're foul, you're dirty, you're a prostitute, and you're an object that is 'passed around' when you have sex.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Gein#Early_life
At this rate, they'll soon be pushing for equal time for 'It rubs the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose again.'
Jefferson23
(30,099 posts)when I open the thread...and then they're not. Happens more and more.
This is sickening.
Tsiyu
(18,186 posts)or not......
Edit to add
Well, I'm a good ol' girl an' I would like to please you every way I can
I've loved you an' I've always let you have the upper hand
How come you think you're so smart an' I'm the weaker sex?
There ain't a man alive can match a woman, trick for trick
We've come a long way, baby
All the way to Hollywood from Arkansas
We've come a long way, baby
Second class don't turn me on at all
Well, I don't wanna wear the pants, but I'm a-gonna have my say
From now on, lover-boy it's fifty-fifty, all the way
Up to now I've been an object made for pleasin' you
Times have changed and I'm demanding satisfaction too
We've come a long way, baby
All the way to Hollywood from Arkansas
We've come a long way, baby
Second class don't turn me on at all
We've come a long way, baby
All the way to Hollywood from Arkansas
We've come a long way, baby
Second class don't turn me on at all
Songwriters
L.E. WHITE, SHIRL MILETE
Published by
Lyrics © COPYRIGHT RECAPTURE, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
GreatCaesarsGhost
(8,585 posts)notadmblnd
(23,720 posts)it wouldn't have gotten dirty.
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)Ken Burch
(50,254 posts)Skeeter Barnes
(994 posts)whopis01
(3,523 posts)awoke_in_2003
(34,582 posts)C_eh_N_eh_D_eh
(2,205 posts)Threedifferentones
(1,070 posts)The double standard in regards to promiscuity is REALLY FUCKING OLD. A male who sleeps around is a "player" while a female is a "slut."
In the civilized world we have accepted that sex between consenting adults is generally a great thing for both people, but then there is Mississippi...
walkingman
(7,660 posts)of the well-known issue of Republicans not being comfortable with their sexuality. These folks are pushing this phobia down to their kids. We see this on a regular basis here in Texas.
Logical
(22,457 posts)AverageJoe90
(10,745 posts).....and many of the roots of *that* problem go all the way back to slavery & all the other bad stuff that came with it, either directly or indirectly.
StevieM
(10,500 posts)AverageJoe90
(10,745 posts)I'm an allohistorical writer(amateur, not professional, though) and one of the worst ignorance-based cliches that I've come across in my field is that the idea of a totally decadent/libertine slaver society(particularly one that is centered in the South of America, or an equivalent), in which said libertinism is held up by the very elite of said nation, is any sort of plausible; and it seems that lot of this is actually based on a certain type of terribly skewed view of U.S. history that seems to come largely from a right-libertarian point of view(i.e. Progressives = controlling killjoys).
RainDog
(28,784 posts)to rape slaves, to have affairs, etc. but not (white) women. Black men were a threat because of sexual politics between males.
The south is a very hypocritical and VERY class conscience place - anyone from the south knows that money is the divider there and how that money was made also matters for a few generations.
AverageJoe90
(10,745 posts)And, by the way, what I pointed out doesn't discount the hypocrisy that was *quite* prevalent in Southern society back then(and still is today), including the blind eye that was so often turned to rape of slave women. But *genuine* libertinism was hardly approved of in the South, especially not in those days; on the contrary, many of the elite, particularly during the 1840-65 period were reactionary authoritarians(men like Robert Rhett & William Miles above all), and so were the Dixiecrats that succeeded them. Why else do you think that "anti-miscegenation" laws were created for example? Or the various black codes? The Dixiecrats were merely taking after their spiritual(and in some cases, literal) ancestors.
RainDog
(28,784 posts)however, yes, allow me to say - that's more of a matter of class hypocrisy and racism than libertinism.
I just have soooooooo many examples of this hypocrisy - including pastors who thought they had to preach about others' sins of the flesh while making sexual passes at women -- or at least more than one I know of, including a female relative in marriage counseling - so even the "not libertine" doesn't apply to white males who think women are sluts and, hey, let me have some of that...
the entire mindset makes me wretch.
sakabatou
(42,174 posts)Ken Burch
(50,254 posts)...at least the ones in Mississippi...from what I've heard...
sakabatou
(42,174 posts)Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)Ken Burch
(50,254 posts)...if she's your sister-cousin...
Dorian Gray
(13,501 posts)Leave it to mississippi to educate kids to be ashamed of themselves.
I'm surprised this happened in Oxford, though. Isn't it a college town (hence, more liberal)?
yellowcanine
(35,701 posts)and Peppermint Pattie being a lesbian couple in the Peanuts comic strip.
surrealAmerican
(11,364 posts)Maybe they could make it less subtle, and just wrap the candy in a condom.
blkmusclmachine
(16,149 posts)cer7711
(502 posts)All rolled into one class: a trifecta of idiotic, offensive and just plain wrong teaching on human sexuality.
Is our children learning? (Clearly not, in this class!)
LittleGirl
(8,291 posts)IronLionZion
(45,528 posts)yum!
Glassunion
(10,201 posts)That's a nickname my wife gave me...
Just sayin'
LynneSin
(95,337 posts)lark
(23,155 posts)Got in a big hassle there in my younger "hippie" days that we were lucky to survive. Feel sorry for any sane person that lives there.
RKP5637
(67,112 posts)coworker that once had to work there for awhile. It was like going on a tour of combat duty. They did a contractual agreement on how long they would have to work in Mississippi, and that a job would definitely be waiting for them ASAP when they completed that assignment. They found it to be an absolutely dreadful place.
Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)NickB79
(19,258 posts)Also, fuck you, sex ed teachers in Oxford, Miss.
redqueen
(115,103 posts)That one seems very popular with certain types of people.
thank you for the strength to not snark.
Amen.
redqueen
(115,103 posts)CFLDem
(2,083 posts)[URL=.html][IMG][/IMG][/URL]
redqueen
(115,103 posts)and your response is to giggle and further obsess about a group on DU.
Yes, of course it is.
CFLDem
(2,083 posts)Hallelujah Praise The Lord!!!!
Tsiyu
(18,186 posts)but really wants you to notice it.
"I'm here! look at me! Look at me!"
It's amusing in a sad, pathetic sort of way. It must be so lonely.....
Ohio Joe
(21,761 posts)So you will possibly post something that will get hidden. You are being stalked and trolled by an MRA, it's obvious.... This non-sense of trying to bring up HoF like this is pretty transparent. Don't let it succeed.
redqueen
(115,103 posts)I was thinking maybe he agreed with the lock/key analogy, and didn't want to just come out and say so.
If anyone here does agree with it, I'd like them to say so so we can know who they are. There are some of those MRA types who are careful about what they say here, because they know they will likely be PPRd if they just come out and say what they think about some issues (too bad that's not a big enough clue for them that the shit they believe is fucked up as all hell).
Response to DonViejo (Original post)
radicalliberal This message was self-deleted by its author.
ehrnst
(32,640 posts)makes young rape victims reluctant to report rape.
Solly Mack
(90,785 posts)greymattermom
(5,754 posts)Only married couples who can produce a marriage license can rent apartments, hotel rooms, buy houses, etc. All other occupancy must be single. No same sex roommates either. Now, let's look at how businesses likes those states.
Burf-_-
(205 posts)THey use a similar analogy about virgin women, or women who do not wear a hijab or burqa. Next time they deny being the American Taliban...just remind them of this them this. All of it is about objectifying a woman to a piece of candy , and dehumanizing her.
http://mahavalous.com/2014/03/02/why-the-wrapped-vs-unwrapped-candy-analogy-is-wrong-when-it-comes-to-hijab/
VA_Jill
(9,995 posts)promiscuous boys to hot dogs that have been dropped and rolled around in the dirt.
LiberalFighter
(51,084 posts)If as they say a woman becomes dirty (meaning not being a virgin) and not worth marrying then wouldn't that also mean the woman becomes dirty after the marriage and becomes deflowered? Would they then by that logic divorce the wife?
How the hell do they know a woman is or is not a virgin? The hymen is not an indicator of that factor. Women don't all have the same type of hymen. Few totally obstruct the opening and when it does it requires surgery to open it up so the menstruation flow has a way to get out.
Tierra_y_Libertad
(50,414 posts)backscatter712
(26,355 posts)Liberal_in_LA
(44,397 posts)Bigmack
(8,020 posts)How about this one. It still objectifies women, but at least it's more realistic....
A fine piece of wood just gets more beautiful if you handle it and smooth it.
or....
The (apocryphal) story about the Inuit man who lent out his wife. He said "If I loan out my harpoon, it comes back dull, if I loan out my kayak, it comes back leaking, but if I loan out my wife, she comes back smiling."
As long as we're comparing sex to something, let's make it a little more realistic.
DeSwiss
(27,137 posts)(1963) Nina Simone
The name of this tune is Mississippi Goddam
And I mean every word of it
Alabama's gotten me so upset
Tennessee made me lose my rest
And everybody knows about Mississippi Goddam
Alabama's gotten me so upset
Tennessee made me lose my rest
And everybody knows about Mississippi Goddam
Can't you see it
Can't you feel it
It's all in the air
I can't stand the pressure much longer
Somebody say a prayer.......
K&R