The Social Death Penalty: Why Being Ostracized Can Hurt Even More Than Bullying

http://www.alternet.org/culture/social-death-penalty-why-being-ostracized-can-hurt-even-more-bullying



In recent years, bullying and harassment at work and in school have been grabbing headlines, creating greater awareness. But there’s a dehumanizing experience that is just as common, perhaps even more damaging to targets, and far less well-understood.

We’re talking about ostracism, a form of social rejection that goes by many names and comes in many flavors. Some call it the “social death penalty.” It’s the feeling of being a pariah, of being shunned, ignored by the group, or given the silent treatment. It can mean anything from physical exile to subtle forms of psychological isolation. Whatever you call it, ostracism is a ghastly form of hurt.

You might think bullying is worse than ostracism, but recent research suggests that being frozen out is actually more painful. From social exclusion on the playground to being ignored in the workplace, ostracism is among the most devastating experiences we can endure, deeply connected to our most fundamental human need to be recognized and accepted. Ostracism can reshape the human brain, and in extreme cases, even make a person want to go on a killing spree. Isn’t it time we knew more about it?

The Ancient Roots of Ostracism

The modern word “ostracism” comes from an ancient Athenian political practice in which a person could be removed for 10 years if enough citizens expressed this desire through a vote cast on pottery shards (ostrakon). Interestingly, ostracism was often used preemptively as a way neutralizing someone who might be a threat to the state. There was no trial, no jury and no defense. You simply had to pack your bags and get out of town. Political theorists have suggested that ostracism served to solidify group identity — clarifying what “we” are and what “we” are not. In the Athenian democracy, the rejection was often centered on a person, frequently powerful, with a tendency toward tyranny.