The New, More Patriotic AP History Test

Here is the updated, more patriotic test that conservatives are pushing for.




Women only began voting in the year 1920 because:
a.) they just didn’t want to before then, it was weird
b.) a woman’s tiny hands couldn’t lift the heavy paper ballots of the time
c.) they were all too busy sewing flags
d.) all of the above

Police sprayed African Americans with firehoses because:
a.) they had a bee on them
b.) it was the best way to stay cool in the Alabama heat
c.) they were all wearing suspicious, dark-colored hoodies
d.) that never happened (circle this answer and get a free Personal Pan Pizza from Pizza Hut!)

During World War II, thousands of Japanese Americans were rounded up and sent to internment camps because:
a.) they won a contest
b.) of a clerical error by a White House intern
c.) they were all terrorists, even the babies
d.) oh, they were Japanese? Sorry, I don’t see race.

The Founding Fathers were great because of their:
a.) muscular, syphilis-free physiques
b.) commitment to freedom for all
c.) ability to multitask (preaching freedom while simultaneously owning slaves)
d.) sick ponytails

Which word or phrase best describes the United States' treatment of Native Americans during the age of colonization?:
a.) fun
b.) flirty
c.) super chill
d.) un-genocidal



The bald eagle fucking kicks ass, right?:
a.) strongly agree
b.) patriotically agree
c.) fuck yeah it does!
d.) I once saw one eating the guts out of a smaller bird right in front of its babies, it was awesome.



more questions here:


http://www.funnyordie.com/articles/ea5dc8d02c/the-new-more-patriotic-ap-history-test