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joeybee12

(56,177 posts)
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 01:15 PM Dec 2014

Father Addresses Firestorm Over ‘Just Being a Dad’ Photo

https://s.yimg.com/bt/api/res/1.2/NMskp1OY0ILjUEjeDcgjUg--/YXBwaWQ9eW5ld3M7Zmk9ZmlsbDtoPTM3NztpbD1wbGFuZTtweG9mZj01MDtweW9mZj0wO3E9NzU7dz02NzA-/


When Jon Arrigo posted a photo of himself playing video games while one young daughter sat beside his and another painted his toenails, the 28-year-old father unleashed a firestorm of mixed reaction.

Just hours after he uploaded the photo titled “Just Being a Dad” to the website Reddit on Dec. 2, the photo drew strong comments.

“Looks awesome from here,” one of many supportive commenters wrote of the photo, while another wrote: “Respect, my man. I'm a dad of a little girl too. She's too young for that quite yet, but I'll rock some glitter if the need arises,” but many others felt just the opposite.

“Put the controller down and play with your kids,” one wrote, and another chimed in: “Father of the year award. ... Stop playing ps4 and enjoy some time with your kids ... Priorities ...”

https://gma.yahoo.com/father-addresses-firestorm-over-just-being-dad-photo-154448486--abc-news-parenting.html

He let the girl paint his toenails...sounds like a good dad to me.
42 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Father Addresses Firestorm Over ‘Just Being a Dad’ Photo (Original Post) joeybee12 Dec 2014 OP
Constant personal attack is the great leveler in a time Eleanors38 Dec 2014 #1
And that pretty much sums up the internet. It can probably be expressed in a formula stevenleser Dec 2014 #2
+1 uponit7771 Dec 2014 #10
Indeed. hifiguy Dec 2014 #13
The insidious quality is how ultra-modern & hep Eleanors38 Dec 2014 #33
interesting point n/t fishwax Dec 2014 #25
Brilliant analysis. OrwellwasRight Dec 2014 #26
yes, because loser assholes online can know EXACTLY every detail of their relationship snooper2 Dec 2014 #3
Right? How do they know the little girl doesn't have next on the controller? Rex Dec 2014 #5
It is the same Internet story over and over-people that think they know a person from one photo Johonny Dec 2014 #14
when my daughter was young she wanted to doll up daddy so i sat there while she did belzabubba333 Dec 2014 #4
LOL, see this: FSogol Dec 2014 #6
yep that was me (although it really was her idea) belzabubba333 Dec 2014 #8
Oh, I'm in love Number23 Dec 2014 #42
Stepdaughter did the same to me when she was 5-6. It was the cutest god-damned KingCharlemagne Dec 2014 #11
This post is useless without pictures. Brigid Dec 2014 #29
Ah, geez, This happened 16-17 years ago, as the crow flies, and I don't think we KingCharlemagne Dec 2014 #40
Hee hee. Brigid Dec 2014 #41
The irony is... lame54 Dec 2014 #7
obviously he thought the picture of himself was funny and decided to share it. Takket Dec 2014 #9
When I was a little girl I use to comb my grandad hair and put ribbons and barettes in it. SummerSnow Dec 2014 #12
that is a-freaking-dorable! renate Dec 2014 #17
I did the same to my dad while he watched Star Trek. We were both hooked! riderinthestorm Dec 2014 #22
Sounds like a VERY special man etherealtruth Dec 2014 #28
This message was self-deleted by its author hunter Dec 2014 #15
That's really sweet A Little Weird Dec 2014 #16
Everyone's a fucking critic. Warren DeMontague Dec 2014 #18
Yep, haters gotta hate, as that slogan goes... calimary Dec 2014 #19
Sounds like a good dad to me too. There isn't a single parent out there who hasn't liberal_at_heart Dec 2014 #20
If you are truly putting the effort in to raise a child Alittleliberal Dec 2014 #36
"Enjoy some time with your kids." Brickbat Dec 2014 #21
Exactly. Sheldon Cooper Dec 2014 #23
+1 Quayblue Dec 2014 #24
aww, I think it's a cute photo. Terra Alta Dec 2014 #27
Looks like these little girls have all sorts of expressive activities they engage in. NBachers Dec 2014 #30
lol, I love this MerryBlooms Dec 2014 #31
Me and my daughters do "spa night" where they paint my nails and put goop in my hair. Throd Dec 2014 #32
Notice how the entire table is covered in stickers? Nevernose Dec 2014 #34
What a non-issue deutsey Dec 2014 #35
I'm not a parent and I have no problem with that photo nt LiberalElite Dec 2014 #37
I didn't mean to imply all non-parents wouldn't get it deutsey Dec 2014 #38
That's just adorable picture. Marr Dec 2014 #39
 

Eleanors38

(18,318 posts)
1. Constant personal attack is the great leveler in a time
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 01:34 PM
Dec 2014

where fewer believe they have power over their lives. So, they exercise a synthetic democratic power by tearing others down, and Any behavior, picture, or statement will do.

 

stevenleser

(32,886 posts)
2. And that pretty much sums up the internet. It can probably be expressed in a formula
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 01:38 PM
Dec 2014

Any internet post has a percentage chance of being attacked that increases greatly with how many people view it.

 

hifiguy

(33,688 posts)
13. Indeed.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 02:46 PM
Dec 2014

Poverty and insecurity are still the best tools for setting the masses at each others' throats while the country is being dismantled. It provides perfect cover for the theft of everything.

 

Eleanors38

(18,318 posts)
33. The insidious quality is how ultra-modern & hep
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 09:53 PM
Dec 2014

it has become. I don't think this cultural conformity could have gone this far without the break up of clear, defensible, and accepted societal standards and mythology. As it is, the individuated nature of social media provides a kind of panache to this activity; every cyberbully and doxxydick is given gas giant status by the rest of mass media which, for better or worse, tries to prop up an older standard of national civility. But it's not hep, it's the same impotent tough guy conformity, now given a few minutes of free fame.

 

snooper2

(30,151 posts)
3. yes, because loser assholes online can know EXACTLY every detail of their relationship
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 01:48 PM
Dec 2014

by one still picture-


 

Rex

(65,616 posts)
5. Right? How do they know the little girl doesn't have next on the controller?
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 02:16 PM
Dec 2014

Shit that is an awesome dad imo! Letting his little girl paint his toes...I think that is awesome.

I know guys that will go into fits if their son wears a pink shirt! Internet parents know everything about raising kids.

Johonny

(20,854 posts)
14. It is the same Internet story over and over-people that think they know a person from one photo
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 02:46 PM
Dec 2014

People have been fired, given death threats, and had their lives ruined over other people's vile (often comical) interpretations of a single Internet photo of a brief moment in their entire life where they aren't doing anything illegal, abusive or interesting. It is hard to believe this keeps happening over and over. We have become the hyper-overactive imagination Country.

 

belzabubba333

(1,237 posts)
4. when my daughter was young she wanted to doll up daddy so i sat there while she did
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 02:09 PM
Dec 2014

she thought momma would get a laugh when she came home.

 

KingCharlemagne

(7,908 posts)
40. Ah, geez, This happened 16-17 years ago, as the crow flies, and I don't think we
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 11:31 PM
Dec 2014

have any pics of it, since we were kind of late adapters of digital cameras and cellphones and so on. I'll have to try to paint a picture for you with words. As I recall, my stepdaughter did my fingernails up with this dark purple polish and then she stuck some little white sticker-y things on them. I ended up looking a bit like Gene Simmons, save that I'm a guitar and piano player so my nails are cut a bit closer. Her Mom got a hoot out of it when she saw the finished product. Of course, she heard her daughter giggling the whole time, so I think she had a pretty good idea what the finished product would look like. The episode became a source of much laughter and merriment over the years, particularly around the gender-destabilizing components

Takket

(21,579 posts)
9. obviously he thought the picture of himself was funny and decided to share it.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 02:41 PM
Dec 2014

reaction against this is absurd. Very frustrating.

SummerSnow

(12,608 posts)
12. When I was a little girl I use to comb my grandad hair and put ribbons and barettes in it.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 02:45 PM
Dec 2014

He was a helluva man worked on naval ships from 5am to 5pm. Took care of his family. Best grandad in the world. He would play with us when we visited, told stories about his childhood. I really miss him.

 

riderinthestorm

(23,272 posts)
22. I did the same to my dad while he watched Star Trek. We were both hooked!
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:16 PM
Dec 2014

I'd brush and barrette and slip in bobby pins and peer around his head to,watch the show with him.

It was a fantastic half hour of bonding...

Response to joeybee12 (Original post)

A Little Weird

(1,754 posts)
16. That's really sweet
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 07:32 PM
Dec 2014

There are a lot of folks out there (especially on Reddit) who always look for something to complain about regardless of the story.

calimary

(81,323 posts)
19. Yep, haters gotta hate, as that slogan goes...
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:03 PM
Dec 2014

I think it's great. Those little girls are gonna grow up with very fond memories of a dad who was loving and supportive of everything they wanted to do.

liberal_at_heart

(12,081 posts)
20. Sounds like a good dad to me too. There isn't a single parent out there who hasn't
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:03 PM
Dec 2014

zoned out watching tv or reading email or playing Candy Crush on their smart phone while their children are playing.

Alittleliberal

(528 posts)
36. If you are truly putting the effort in to raise a child
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 10:16 PM
Dec 2014

You find there are many moments you just have to ignore them.

Brickbat

(19,339 posts)
21. "Enjoy some time with your kids."
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:03 PM
Dec 2014

Obviously, he is. Kids don't need direct attention and interaction every damn second. It just sets them up to be disappointed when they don't get it later in life. Passive interaction is just fine. Keep on keeping on, Arrigo.

Sheldon Cooper

(3,724 posts)
23. Exactly.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:24 PM
Dec 2014

The kids are with their dad and they're all engaging in leisure activities in the same space. I'm sure they're chit-chatting back and forth, too. There is nothing wrong with this and his kids will remember the time they painted daddy's toenails and snuggled with him on the couch. He's doing a great job.

Terra Alta

(5,158 posts)
27. aww, I think it's a cute photo.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:44 PM
Dec 2014

Screw the haters. Just because he doesn't give his kids his undivided
attention 24/7 doesn't make him a bad father. Looks like they are all having a good time.

NBachers

(17,124 posts)
30. Looks like these little girls have all sorts of expressive activities they engage in.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:49 PM
Dec 2014

Looks like a fine family activity night to me.

MerryBlooms

(11,770 posts)
31. lol, I love this
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:53 PM
Dec 2014

Good on him!

When I was little, I wanted to be a hairdresser, and guess who let me do his hair? lol, yep, my dad. One day I styled his hair with bobby pins and ribbon when he was sleeping (he'd been out on forest service fire crew all night) and he woke up and dashed to the market for milk and cigs. He didn't realize he was sporting a new 'do until he was checking out and brushed his hand through his hair. He came home spitting mad. Sadly, that was the end of my dad letting me do his hair.

Throd

(7,208 posts)
32. Me and my daughters do "spa night" where they paint my nails and put goop in my hair.
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 08:56 PM
Dec 2014

They'll make lotions to rub on my arms and feet and scald my face with hot towels.

I enjoy every moment of it.

Nevernose

(13,081 posts)
34. Notice how the entire table is covered in stickers?
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 10:00 PM
Dec 2014

Notice how the entire coffee table is covered in stickers? And "girlie" princess stickers, too? That dad loves his kids full time whether he plays video games or not, and those kids know it every time they see the stickers.

deutsey

(20,166 posts)
35. What a non-issue
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 10:15 PM
Dec 2014

I would imagine the sanctimonious critics are probably not parents themselves, or are helicopter parents micromanaging every second of their kids' lives.

deutsey

(20,166 posts)
38. I didn't mean to imply all non-parents wouldn't get it
Wed Dec 10, 2014, 10:24 PM
Dec 2014

but that the kind of presumptuous non-parents who assume they would be so much better at parenting than the parents they're critiquing.

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