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bluestateguy

(44,173 posts)
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 12:53 AM Dec 2014

Apologies are signs of weakness



Never apologize (even if you really are wrong).

Your critics will NEVER be appeased; they'll see the exploitable weakness and just keep on beating up on you.

And it's never really about apologizing anyway. It's about making your adversary do a Walk of Shame, so you can continue beating up on him. It's just gamesmanship.
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Apologies are signs of weakness (Original Post) bluestateguy Dec 2014 OP
Disagree. Trillo Dec 2014 #1
disagree oldandhappy Dec 2014 #2
I'm sorry you feel that way. n/t PoliticAverse Dec 2014 #3
Odd approach to human relations. Everything is 'gamesmanship'? Very peculiar indeed. . . Journeyman Dec 2014 #4
You mean like this? Nye Bevan Dec 2014 #5
Might be my least favorite Gibbs-ism... Wounded Bear Dec 2014 #6
Actually it's a sign of weakness not to apologize. and, it's a sign of a stubborn arrogant ignorant Cha Dec 2014 #7
Disagree vehemently. SamKnause Dec 2014 #8
You're not apologizing to appease enemies and critics Warpy Dec 2014 #9
Disagree. bhikkhu Dec 2014 #10
Fuck that. (nt) Posteritatis Dec 2014 #11
No. n/t TorchTheWitch Dec 2014 #12
I completely disagree. Union Scribe Dec 2014 #13
I'm going against the grain and I'm going to agree - with a caveat laundry_queen Dec 2014 #14
what is this in reference to? nt Javaman Dec 2014 #15
No (nt) bigwillq Dec 2014 #16
Apologies are for children. Adults make amends. Iggo Dec 2014 #17
Adults apologize AND make amends. Orsino Dec 2014 #18
I respect that you feel that way about it. Iggo Dec 2014 #24
when you are wrong, you are wrong. it is the coward that cannot own a wrong. nt seabeyond Dec 2014 #19
No they aren't. Are_grits_groceries Dec 2014 #20
Depends on who you are apologizing to and why Lurks Often Dec 2014 #21
Sadly, that is the American way in business and politics. Xyzse Dec 2014 #22
Critics, adversary, gamesmanship? Avalux Dec 2014 #23

Journeyman

(15,036 posts)
4. Odd approach to human relations. Everything is 'gamesmanship'? Very peculiar indeed. . .
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 01:09 AM
Dec 2014

We all deal with reality as we perceive it, I reckon. Some with a different twist, as it were.

Wounded Bear

(58,666 posts)
6. Might be my least favorite Gibbs-ism...
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 01:28 AM
Dec 2014

At least in later seasons he got more realistic.

Sure, insincere apologies are generally offered by those who are emotionally weak, but a sincere apology is a sign of good character and moral strength. Of course, a true apology is also a promise of changed (improved) behavior in the future.

Cha

(297,304 posts)
7. Actually it's a sign of weakness not to apologize. and, it's a sign of a stubborn arrogant ignorant
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 01:31 AM
Dec 2014

buffoon, imo. It's also rwing philosophy.

SamKnause

(13,107 posts)
8. Disagree vehemently.
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 01:42 AM
Dec 2014

Not being able to admit when you have done or said something wrong is a sign of weakness.

If you were referring to the political arena, Republicans are insane and their entire agenda is based on PROVEN failed policies.

The majority of politicians are paid shills.

Warpy

(111,273 posts)
9. You're not apologizing to appease enemies and critics
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 01:48 AM
Dec 2014

You're apologizing because that's how you keep your friends.

bhikkhu

(10,718 posts)
10. Disagree.
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 02:15 AM
Dec 2014

When you are wrong the only option that doesn't tie you up into knots is to admit it and move on. When you are wrong and your "critics", or whoever, know it, then you either show yourself as someone who cares about facts and reality or you show yourself to be an ass and a blowhard.

Union Scribe

(7,099 posts)
13. I completely disagree.
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 02:55 AM
Dec 2014

I know you're talking about political faux outrages and the demands for apology as a a talking point, and I agree that those should be ignored. But in day to day life there is nothing that defuses a situation and restores two people mentally like a real apology. It benefits both the apologee and the apologizer. Apologies and forgiveness are critical social tools, and I'd say that they are severely underutilized in modern life.

laundry_queen

(8,646 posts)
14. I'm going against the grain and I'm going to agree - with a caveat
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 03:00 AM
Dec 2014

I think this is true in politics for the most part, but definitely NOT in your personal life. And there ARE times in political life when an apology is necessary. However, you are correct that Democrats should never apologize to Republicans, because Republicans are sociopaths who see any kind of regret/apology as exactly what you said - exploitable weakness. Republicans absolutely revel in the game of having a fit trying to make a Democrat apologize, and then pointing the finger and saying, "see? See? s/he admitted it! I was right!" It's a ploy Democrats fall for again and again. I have never understood why, it never makes anything better.

Are_grits_groceries

(17,111 posts)
20. No they aren't.
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 11:21 AM
Dec 2014

When you have wronged someone, a sincere apology is a sign of strength and of confidence in yourself. Insecure people don't apologize because they do think it exposes their weaknesses.

I would apologize to my students if I did something that was wrong. It made an impression because I think it was rare for a teacher to do so. I never pretended I was perfect. That's setting yourself up for failure.

 

Lurks Often

(5,455 posts)
21. Depends on who you are apologizing to and why
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 11:26 AM
Dec 2014

If you are apologizing to the little monster running North Korea, that's probably wrong and will certainly be viewed as a sign of weakness.

If you are apologizing to an ally, friend or family member for a mistake you made, then that is usually the right thing to do.

Xyzse

(8,217 posts)
22. Sadly, that is the American way in business and politics.
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 11:28 AM
Dec 2014

It is amazing how the culture evolved towards that route. I find it pretty disgusting, but unfortunately that is how they think, and in some ways it works.

No, in many ways it works. It is how marketing goes...

I guess that is why I dislike marketing.

Avalux

(35,015 posts)
23. Critics, adversary, gamesmanship?
Tue Dec 30, 2014, 11:29 AM
Dec 2014

It's interesting you framed apologizing this way. What about apologizing to those with whom you have close relationships, and who mean you no harm? Is it still a sign of weakness?

I will apologize if I feel as if I've acted in a way that doesn't represent who I am, or if my actions have hurt someone else. I do it for me. If the other person doesn't accept it, or sees it as a sign of weakness, that's their problem not mine.

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