Funny OpEd: "Global warming is totally a lie liberals tell to distract us from their commie agendas"

This so-called “environmental Armageddon” is a fictitious construction cooked up by the left so we’ll spend all our time (or at least a half hour a week) changing out our light bulbs and flattening cardboard and completely overlooking their pinko/commie/socialist agendas. I’m on to you, liberals! You’re trying to be heroes to humanity. You want everyone to pat you on the back and say, “Oh, look who saved the planet!”

Well, I have news for you. The planet doesn’t need saving. After all, it’s been around for almost 2,000 years. It was fine before you got here, and it’ll be fine after the apocalypse destroys most of humankind for the sins of homosexuality and shellfish consumption. God hates Shrimp Scampi, but He doesn’t seem to have a problem with littering. (Leviticus 10:10)

I wish people would stop incessantly asking, “Don’t we care what kind of planet we’re going to leave our children?” First of all, I’m pretty sure any child psychologist would agree that leaving a whole planet to a kid is an appalling idea. I wouldn’t dream of spoiling my daughter with an entire planet. You don’t have to give your kids the world; just spend some time with them once in a while. That’s what they really want. That, and a Mercedes SUV for their sweet 16.

But the most telling sign that global warming is not an actual threat is this: the Republican presidential candidates aren’t trying to scare us with the prospect that we’re all doomed to die from toxic air and scorching temperatures. And Republican presidential candidates love scaring the public. It’s their passion. If they could put a gun to each of our heads individually and say, “Vote for me or else you die”, I think they would.

http://www.theguardian.com/environment/commentisfree/2015/jun/19/global-warming-lie-liberals-tell-distract-us

I love the last reason that global warming cannot be real. If it were real wouldn't republicans be using it to scare us. "It's their passion." (I know there are profits to be made in warming up the planet.)