more will see this and take time to read the article. The clip and headline do not do it justice. It is a good article, addresses many of the points people have already used in replies.

To answer you, she didn't. But read the article to see what was said and why.

I will be able to.

as it addressed the points I had thought of. Sorry for the yell, not directed at you, just putting it up at the top.

shutting down the Illinois office. I was only in Durham (actually, Bahama) for about two years. I am an older white woman - A Yankee, to the guys I worked with. Was treated pretty much like a gaijin would be treated in Japan, by Japanese who did not like Americans.
Became friendly with a black woman in another department, and one day at lunch, as we were talking about some work issues, I asked her why she moved back to NC after having worked in Chicago for a while. Because NC seemed so racist.

She said at least in NC they are racist to my face. They are sneakier in the North.

I guarantee your white aunt knows that there are racists in NY. So, she somehow felt the statement was directed at her. Context would tell is why that was the case.

Basing anything on just one sentence of a conversation is foolish.

I get this every time I post an article written in the first person.

Sadly, many people in this world only think in extremes and endeavor to black and white thinking.

And in my travels and work all around this country I would say the most racist people I have ever run across would be a tie between some individuals from Boston and some from the Western mountain states, Montana specifically if I recall right.

It's everywhere.

I'm from the south but my job allows me to travel all over the country. The south is far from holding a monopoly on racist.

in your face. In the South it was much more subtle, but I got their message too.

NW Pa. vs Alabama

And strangely enough I think I saw less Confederate flags in Alabama than I do here.

As James Carville famously noted while working on a Senate campaign up there, it's "Pittsburgh and Philadelphia, with Alabama in between".

The ignorance is astounding.

kind of racist?

states to see how open the racism was. I finally realized that I was expecting there to be more, hidden, as I was used to and found the open "I'm a bigot" stuff rather refreshing as I didn't have to guess.

That comment may not have been in particular about the aunt, but it is true that up north the racism is present but covert vs overt. Back from reading the article, this part addresses that point: To my aunt, the suggestion that “people in The North are racist” is an attack on her as a racist. She is unable to differentiate her participation within a racist system (upwardly mobile, not racially profiled, able to move to White suburbs, etc.) from an accusation that she, individually, is a racist. Without being able to make that differentiation, White people in general decide to vigorously defend their own personal non-racism, or point out that it doesn’t exist because they don’t see it.

Dad wasn't or his parents born before the turn of the century weren't and we were surrounded in our little village in upstarted N.Y. by racist . I was so proud through the years I had a dad who was cool, and identified racism as peoples insecurities projected on other people simply because of their color . Mom the sweetest lady you will ever meet was raised in Auburn New York the home of Hariett Tubman and the Underground Railroad, was raised by two people who were suspicious of anyone not German/Irish/french Canadian, Italians were held in contempt by my grandfather .This still effects my 83 yr old mother still today and since the world has progressed on issues so has she , but we could always tell the difference between my parents that one had to work on it while the other thought it ridicules .

racism in the north and especially New York, where mayor Bloomberg put an x Minorities heads for walking down the street .

Reason.

your question is acceptable, if not , Oh well . The only time the conversation gets difficult is when people try to usurp authority over it .

some people on here just itch for a fight when there wasn't even a reason to fight in the first place.

People in my 99 and 44/100 Ivory Soap White "hometown," the town I fled, are certain they are not racists. They don't see color.



But then in conversations, they'll say things like, "The Mexicans..." blah, blah, blah. Or they'll talk about some city they wouldn't live in, usually a city that's not white.

I live in a city that is not white. 40% of the people here speak Spanish at home. Public school graduations and promotions are bilingual so proud immigrant grandparents and parents can follow along. Most of the shoppers in Wal-Mart are speaking Spanish, and most retail employees are bilingual. My wife and kids are bilingual too, but my kids are a little shy about their Spanish. My own brain, as much as I try, seems to be fossilized in English, but I almost know what's happening when conversations are a mix of both languages.

My own grandfather, a man who worked with all sorts of people and had honest friendships with them, was very upset that I was, in his words, marrying "a Mexican girl." (Sadly my white grandma who spoke Spanish fluently and loved Mexico had passed away.) In my grandpa's white world of privilege that simply wasn't done. He boycotted our wedding, but he eventually overcame his upbringing.

My great aunt, my grandfather's sister in law, was accepting of everyone. She was happy to attend our Big Catholic Wedding. She'd violated her family moral traditions several times by divorcing, eventually finding True Love with a divorced Italian. Oh my! Scandal! My family is one of many Catholic heretics, including myself.

My great aunt was born in San Francisco before the great earthquake and was fairly affluent. Like my grandma, born just after the earthquake, she spoke fondly of her family's Chinese laundryman, the black laborers she grew up with, Japanese and Mexican gardeners, Irish housekeepers... But she could also say the most awful racist things. She never used the impolite "N" word, she always used "colored," she never used any of the common racial slurs, not even the "J" word for the Japanese during World War II. But she and her sister were, in every way, people of white California privilege.

Read the article.

I think there is a bit more to the aunt's hurt feelings than her own perceptions. I think that it is very difficult for people of color to discuss racism with whites without some level of personal accusation. The pain and frustration of dealing with microaggressions to full on hate must be exhausting to say the least. I think it's completely understandable that these conversations become dicey. We all need a bit more compassion and understanding if we are going to make any headway. for white people- understanding along with a thicker skin helps too. If you're not a racist then don't take it personally. Learn to listen and take some new information away from the conversation. as the article points out, allow people of color to speak as individuals and take it as one person's opinion.

Last edited Mon Jul 13, 2015, 10:14 PM - Edit history (1)

with any race specifically and here it's very mixed and a lot of bi-racial families. But the one thing I hear over and over is the word "ghetto." I don't mind blacks, latins, asians, etc. I just hate ghetto. I think maybe Californians are more classists than racists.

Our former director (here in San Jose) tried to have an officewide discussion about race. Nearly everyone got their dander up as if she had accused them of being Klan members.

and worth reading several times. Here are some pieces that are worth thinking about, and acting on, at least for me:

because it's such a powerful piece.