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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsRepublicans Worried Wrong A-Hole Is Fronting Their A-Hole Policies
http://www.politicalgarbagechute.com/republicans-worried-wrong-a-hole-is-fronting-their-a-hole-policies/Speaking to the press after a campaign rally in his home state of Wisconsin, Governor Scott Walker (R) told members of the media that he and many of the other Republican candidates for president are tremendiciously concerned about Donald Trump. Walker, a man who spurns the merits of education, called Trump a vacuous, stubborn, asshole who spews toxic crap everywhere he goes but told reporters thats not not even close to why he and his fellow GOP hopefuls are concerned about Trumps run. According to Walker, its because Trump is the wrong asshole for the job that Walker doesnt want him out front.
Its not that hes an asshole were all assholes. I mean, how do you live life in 2015 and honestly stand in front of the American people and tell them we dont help the rich enough, but we help the poor too much, Walker asked the reporters rhetorically. Our polices are asshole policies. Were against gay marriage so much wed rather just stop issuing marriage licenses to everyone instead of being respectful of LGBT people, Walker said, adding, we flatly oppose health care reform, climate change solutions and even an historic nuclear arms deal with Iran, and all without offering a single, viable solution as the alternative. In fact, our solution is precisely to have no solution because government solutions are bad to us, remember, so laziness excused as principle is what wins the day for our voters. We are assholes.
A few hundred miles away in Ohio, Jeb! (R-FL) was echoing Walkers sentiments. Telling the press that while [he] totally understand[s] Trumps appeal and even is jealous of his ability to literally say the things we all want to say but are too afraid to he is concerned about Trumps unwillingness to couch his rhetoric in platitudes. See, we Republicans arent afraid to front the nonsensical, antiquated policies of the past like, say, supply side economics but we always have to be sure to hide the subtext of our rhetoric. Trump just comes out and says racist, xenophobic and downright stupid stuff. Its the stuff our base believes, and its the stuff they want to hear, but hes doing it all wrong. This country needs a president with a family pedigree of championing stupid economic policies and woefully overly-aggressive and misguided wars that knows how to dress-up the Republican crazy with prettier words.
Hes just not very good at obfuscation, Sen. Lyndsey Graham (R-SC) told an audience of about two dozen people at a doughnut shop just down the street from his studio apartment in Washington, D.C. Graham told those near him that Republican politicians go through a grueling, 15-day bootcamp where you are ridden hard, you are hidden fast, and you are trained to say, think and feel the most horribly regressive things, but to do so in a way that makes you the victim if someone calls you out on it.
Its not that hes an asshole were all assholes. I mean, how do you live life in 2015 and honestly stand in front of the American people and tell them we dont help the rich enough, but we help the poor too much, Walker asked the reporters rhetorically. Our polices are asshole policies. Were against gay marriage so much wed rather just stop issuing marriage licenses to everyone instead of being respectful of LGBT people, Walker said, adding, we flatly oppose health care reform, climate change solutions and even an historic nuclear arms deal with Iran, and all without offering a single, viable solution as the alternative. In fact, our solution is precisely to have no solution because government solutions are bad to us, remember, so laziness excused as principle is what wins the day for our voters. We are assholes.
A few hundred miles away in Ohio, Jeb! (R-FL) was echoing Walkers sentiments. Telling the press that while [he] totally understand[s] Trumps appeal and even is jealous of his ability to literally say the things we all want to say but are too afraid to he is concerned about Trumps unwillingness to couch his rhetoric in platitudes. See, we Republicans arent afraid to front the nonsensical, antiquated policies of the past like, say, supply side economics but we always have to be sure to hide the subtext of our rhetoric. Trump just comes out and says racist, xenophobic and downright stupid stuff. Its the stuff our base believes, and its the stuff they want to hear, but hes doing it all wrong. This country needs a president with a family pedigree of championing stupid economic policies and woefully overly-aggressive and misguided wars that knows how to dress-up the Republican crazy with prettier words.
Hes just not very good at obfuscation, Sen. Lyndsey Graham (R-SC) told an audience of about two dozen people at a doughnut shop just down the street from his studio apartment in Washington, D.C. Graham told those near him that Republican politicians go through a grueling, 15-day bootcamp where you are ridden hard, you are hidden fast, and you are trained to say, think and feel the most horribly regressive things, but to do so in a way that makes you the victim if someone calls you out on it.
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Republicans Worried Wrong A-Hole Is Fronting Their A-Hole Policies (Original Post)
Scuba
Aug 2015
OP
Trump has the GOP temporarily off the Fox supplied script. You have to take fascism slowly so as not
Fred Sanders
Aug 2015
#6
It reads like satire, but is too close for comfort to the god-awful truth...
Surya Gayatri
Aug 2015
#8
liberal N proud
(60,335 posts)1. They suddenly realized the emperor has no clothes
sarge43
(28,941 posts)2. Nowadays, it's almost impossible to tell satire from facts n/t
Wonderful satire. At least I hope it's satire. One just doesn't know these days.
bullwinkle428
(20,629 posts)4. BEST description of the Republican campaign season so far - bar none.
K&R.
BlancheSplanchnik
(20,219 posts)5. Delicious satire. Love it!
Its not that hes an asshole were all assholes. I mean, how do you live life in 2015 and honestly stand in front of the American people and tell them we dont help the rich enough, but we help the poor too much, Walker asked the reporters rhetorically. Our polices are asshole policies. Were against gay marriage so much wed rather just stop issuing marriage licenses to everyone instead of being respectful of LGBT people, Walker said, adding, we flatly oppose health care reform, climate change solutions and even an historic nuclear arms deal with Iran, and all without offering a single, viable solution as the alternative. In fact, our solution is precisely to have no solution because government solutions are bad to us, remember, so laziness excused as principle is what wins the day for our voters. We are assholes.
Fred Sanders
(23,946 posts)6. Trump has the GOP temporarily off the Fox supplied script. You have to take fascism slowly so as not
to scare off too many voters.
Cosmocat
(14,565 posts)7. Perhaps the most accurate statement of republicans ever
Republican politicians go through a grueling, 15-day bootcamp where you are ridden hard, you are hidden fast, and you are trained to say, think and feel the most horribly regressive things, but to do so in a way that makes you the victim if someone calls you out on it.
Surya Gayatri
(15,445 posts)8. It reads like satire, but is too close for comfort to the god-awful truth...
Rex
(65,616 posts)9. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
d_legendary1
(2,586 posts)10. So the GOP is basically saying
we are the a-hole party, but we don't want a-holes leading it.
Pretty damn good. And infuriating.
lindysalsagal
(20,692 posts)11. Lindsey with 24 people in a donut shop...
That's probably his biggest crowd, yet!!
Fabulous!