Donald Trump's "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie"
Mice are losers and thieves and rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.
But they're always begging for handouts. "Ooh, give me some cheese, give me a cookie."
I've never made cookies before, but if I did, they'd be the best cookies. They'd be classy.
I'd be a terrific cookie-maker. I have a plan to make the greatest cookies ever.
My cookies will huge... like Rosie O'Donnell. Megyn Kelly will eat so many of these cookies she'll have crumbs coming out of her nose and her... wherever.
Let me tell you--my beautiful wife, Melania, she makes the most luxurious cookies. I think women will really love her cookies. Trust me.
Rand Paul makes terrible cookies. I mean, his cookies are the worst. He's a loser. Nobody likes his cookies.
But we've got to keep the mice away from our cookies. I'm going to build the biggest, best mousetrap ever, and I'm going to make the mice pay for it themselves, because mice are losers.
From anonymous web denizen Tangent.