Adolf Hitler Tired of Being Compared to Donald Trump

NAZI BLOCK, HELL — From within the confines of the Nazi Block that Bob “Satan” Beelzebub built in his Lake of Fire Penitentiary, Adolf Hitler is furious, and he’s not going to be quiet about it.

“That bastard is stealing my material,” Hitler told our reporter by Hell-phone interview, adding that “if people think you need to advocate for the incineration or gassing of more than six million people to be considered a fascist, then the Republicans have done an even better of dumbing down the populace” than he could have possibly hoped to achieve in his own time. Hitler said he’s “sick and tired of being compared to Donald Trump,” and he’s pursuing legal options to shut down the billionaire mogul’s presidential rhetoric on the basis of trademark infringement.


“I had a signature, shitty little mustache, and he’s got a signature, shitty pile of dead straw and human excrement he calls hair,” Hitler said, “and that’s just the mildest of comparisons you can make between us.” Hitler said that “basing a line of political rhetoric solely on the demagoguery of a whole religious sect of people” was something he “worked [his] fingers to their anti-Semitic bones” to perfect and that “some bloviating chump that doesn’t have the balls to call for rounding up his enemies and killing them” will “steal all [his] dictatorial thunder.”

Though he was angry at what he called “a severe violation” of his intellectual property rights when it comes to religious-based persecution of a large swath of people. “He should get his own thing,” Hitler said adding that “fascism, hate-filled rhetoric and propaganda, and downright apathy toward people of non-Aryan descent” was his “shtick.” Hitler said that ultimately he just thinks “Donald is a poser” and that “he probably doesn’t even have the balls to put out a good propaganda film comparing Muslims to rats, or the like,” and that “lack of commitment to the fascist cause” worries him.

http://nationalreport.net/adolf-hitler-tired-of-being-compared-to-donald-trump/