That stinks. I hope your solid story doesn't go to waste, and possibly even starts a movement.

and neither were solid

I see what you did there...salut,,,,BTW I also have severe Crohns

Once when I was in St. Paul for fireworks I had to go really bad. I went into a McDonald's well my whole family really. They got some food and I stood in a really really really long line it was from one side of the store to the other. I waited there about 8 minutes or so and then I gathered up a group of ladies and we took over the men's room for about 10 minutes taking turns guarding the bathroom. Not a single guy objected so it wasn't like we were staring them down or anything like that.

Why were you "guarding" the bathroom?

Are you saying you would be uncomfortable with a man in the same bathroom as you?

I said us women took over the men's room for a period of about 10 minutes on an event day that drew a large crowd. Try some reading comprehension.

Who were the guards "guarding" against?

What would the guards' reaction have been if faced with a transgender individual?

Seriously when I go into a bathroom I don't want to see men's junk.

Presumably there were stalls so no one would have to see anything.

And take their turn in the stall so they could do their business.

unless they have had surgery? Just in case a woman catches a glimpse of their "junk"?

How about averting your eyes?

Not all transgendered people have had sexual reassignment surgery.

In such cases, are you OK with someone who identifies as a female, but still has "men's junk", using female restrooms?

It's about a one off event where there were not enough stalls for women and the line was very very long. The men's room had virtually no line. We women took over for about 10 minutes. I don't care what women use the women's restroom, that is what stalls are for. I am assuming those women with junk are not going to pee against a urinal free wall.

Good lord - when I was younger (mostly college aged and most likely to travel in groups of women to the bathroom), I have said "guard the door" at parties, at bars, when the lock is shifty, I have had my mom or a friend hold the stall door closed for me. I wasn't protecting myself against other women, just some privacy.

I have had my husband stand guard at the bathroom door at a bar - (unisex or whatever) because sometimes people just barge in and if its a one holer...well its embarrassing.

When it's a sporting event, and the lines are long and women "take over" the men's rr, some men have just volunteered to stand guard because some men are weird about sharing bathrooms just like some women are.

standing guard is a turn of phrase...there is nothing to get upset about

"Hey someone is using this bathroom, can you give her a minute". Not sure how being transgender would make a difference.

the "urge" is more like

oh, find a bathroom NOW with little warning at all

Stupid, backwards laws be damned. Nature is more powerful than silly legislation.

once I had to pull into a gas station that was very questionable. There were bars on all the windows and it just wasn't a place I would normally go to by myself ever but I had no choice. I walked through the groups of men and their very loud music found the RR. Locked the door and sat down just in time . Looked up at the door in front of me to a mirror and on it in HUGE letters it said AK-47 princess

but it was a toilet and I didn't embarrass myself!

you gotta do what you gotta do.


has no bearing on if I am a man or woman -I don't care who is in there as long as I don't embarrass me!


these now bathroom rules like NC and other places can fuck off



Kansas Gov wants to put a "bounty" on if the wrong person uses the wrong stall. Try me!!!

Shit, I've been places where the bathroom was a hole in the ground. I shit you not.

once about 5 years ago we were in Mexico. I needed to use the RR. Every store kept saying next door. Finally we found a bar and hubby had to buy a drink before they would let me use the RR.

All it was was a pot, no lid, no water or no paper. but it worked for me.

Or face drastic consequence. There is no debate or small talk, out of the way or get crapped on.

This whole bathroom thing is stupid!

these struggling Red states to stay afloat? No...much better to waste millions on penis/vagina laws...yep yep. Who needs clean drinking water anyways?

I am nervous Texas will now follow suit, since we cannot stand it when another state one-ups us on the crazy! We got to turn Texas blue again Texasgal!

In Spain, 1971, when no other options were available for some hours, we were told, "Hombres a la derecha; mujeres a la izquierda."

when the line is a mile long for the ladies' and no one is in the men's room.

And the men who walk in usually turn around and walk out saying they can wait.

WTF is the big deal?

which is why these RR laws are ridiculous

And they are incredibly efficient when it comes to not waiting in line.

Why not just wait their turn and do what they need to do?

When you're talking to someone, do you position your face four inches from theirs? If you were waiting in line at an ATM, would you stand shoulder to shoulder with the person who's currently using the machine? When you sit down at a restaurant, do you help yourself to an empty spot at someone else's table?

When you have to defecate while at a friend's house, do you shut the door?


Social norms are hardly absolute or inviolable, but they're part of any society, and part of being a functional adult in society entails a basic respect for others' expectations of courtesy.

What am I missing here?

Perhaps the man concluded that the woman using the men's room was doing so because of urgency, rather than because of a utopian "let's all shit together" ideal. As such, perhaps he exited as a courtesy, in deference to his expectations of the woman's desire for privacy.

It's not unreasonable to suppose that a man "on deck" in that example might rightly or wrongly be perceived as having puerile motives. Perhaps he exited to avoid putting himself in such a situation.

Regardless, it seems that he likely exited out of politeness and as a courtesy to the woman.


Why is that so difficult for you to grasp?

But no way am I going to abandon my place in the line and exit the bathroom out of "courtesy". And if I need to go, I am going to join the line in the men's room whether or not women are waiting in the line. I'm not going to complain about the women in the line, I'm just going to patiently wait my turn.

Does this make me a horrible person?

then yes, if I need to go, I am going to join the line in the men's room regardless of whether it is composed of men, women, transgender folk, or a mixture thereof. Interesting to see how many DUers seem to have significant hang-ups over this concept.

That most likely the man will avoid this situation simply to lessen the possibility of conflict. And to follow that train of thought it could seem reasonable that some of the opposition to transgender usage of facilities could be to avoid this very situation.

A one room locked door restroom has no need to be gender specific, and any objection to that is just childish; however large restrooms with multiple stalls/sinks/urinals could very well lead to the uncomfortable situation described. Certainly adding alcohol to this mix as in a large sports bar/stadium would not make one more comfortable with this.

I think a lot of the opposition to the laws being proposed are from opposition being drummed up by some who are not sincere in their objection and just want to stir conflict. But it is not unreasonable to assume that some of the objection is to avoid the very situation described.

I have gone in the men's before and had my husband stand outside. It is a courtesy to all, it might embarrass a man if he goes in and sees a woman come out from one of the of the stalls. It is just common sense.


I have gone in the men's without anybody guarding the door, mainly when it is a one stall restroom with a lock on the door and there is someone in the women's restroom. It is a not a big deal.


Posters - Get a life! Find something else more important to fuss over!

regardless of labels. Its absurd that we would need a law to establish that, basically says what kind of assholes some people are lately.

I spent 50 years not caring where people went to the bathroom. When I was younger out clubbing, girls would frequently use the men's room if they needed to, as the lines were usually shorter; never a problem. When I lived in southern california for a while there was a trans community and people would usually use whichever restroom suited their attire; no complaints, no problems. When I used to take my young daughter out in the evening after she was potty trained, I'd take her into the men's room when she had to go and keep her company outside the stall, never a problem...