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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsEnzyte CEO Steven Warshak named as Trump’s VP
Last edited Tue May 10, 2016, 03:55 PM - Edit history (2)
" target="_blank">In an almost preDICKtable move, maintaining a certain consistency of behavior, values, and theme of the Trumpster Presidential Dynasty Juggernaut, Herr Trump and his intellectual swami and guru, The Great Evil Yoda, Ben Carson, have selected fellow snake oil salesman, former Enzyte CEO Steven Warshak as Mein Trumpfs Vice President. Sure, Mr. Make Big Penises Steven Warshak is presently in prison, serving a 25 year sentence, but no problem, Attorney General Mullah Ted Ratface Cruz will vacate his sentence. Bust him out of the slammer if you will. For a price of course. A lifetime supply of Enzyte. After all, a real dickhead needs a real big dick as well.
Hence, therefore, and onward into the future, America will be run by The Great Snake Oil Salesmen Triumvirate.
And just what is this god given skillset which is shared by these men? Why their ability to sell worthless, useless, fraudulent products and religion to the guillible, rubes, feeble minded, dim witted, desperate, and naïve.
Herr Trumps catalog of useless and worthless is quite extensive and grows larger by the day. Included are bogus trade schools and colleges (Trump U), belly up casinos, purveyor of rancid meat ( Cant Beat Trump Meat), less than fine whines, and many more.
Than we have the esteemed Evil Yoda himself, Svengali/Guru/Swami Ben Carson, Master of the Universe. And Soma Bens magic portion, secret elixir, would be Mannatechs Glyconutrient Products, which treated, cured, and/or mitigated such maladies as: autism, non-Hodgkins lymphoma, life threatening heart condition, toxic shock syndrome, heart failure, asthma, arthritis, Lou Gehrigs disease, Attention Deficit Disorder, and lung inflammation. The good doctor has used his carefully crafted and honed persona of being the medical and religious Svengali savior to prey upon the weak and desperately ill to sell them this worthless shit. Real man of God, this guy is.
This shit was so bad, that Texas Attorney General Gregg Abbott actually sued Mannatech. Yup, that Gregg Abbott. The right wing dumb fuck that seriously thought that Jade Helm 15 was an Obama scheme to take over Texas. Nope, no-one gonna fool that dude.
For a complete account of Mannatech & Carson see :
http://www.nationalreview.com/article/396193/ben-carsons-troubling-connection-jim-geraghty
[link:http://www.nationalreview.com/article/396193/ben-carsons-troubling-connection-jim-geraghty|]
for my previous article on Evil Yoda Ben see :
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027252484
Now we add to this con artist stew, snake oil salesman extraordinaire, Mr. Penis himself, Steven Warshak, CEO of Enzyte, and mentor to Smiling Bob.
I have to admit, it really doesnt take much of a genius to sell something to guys if they think that it will make their dicks bigger. Kind of a slam dunk actually. No challenge there. But, this guy took it to astonishing heights and managed to create a cultural icon in the process. And he was a limitless scumbag. That is why he got a 25 year sentence and 450 million dollar fine. You gotta read the story.
See:
]http://www.slate.com/articles/technology/future_tense/2013/08/enzyte_steven_warshak_the_surprising_case_that_helped_improve_email_privacy.html
So, one might think that this is all there is to the story, that all three of these guys are just out of control con men.
Well, nope, there is one other common thread going on here, and that is a meme which has been a central theme to the Mein Trump campaign for a while now. And that is, a seemingly unnatural obsession with dick size, going all the way back to the infamous Trump/Rubio sword fight.
In 1858, the Great Lincoln Douglas Debates became a part of American History.
In 2016, the Republicans added the Infamous Rubio/Trump Sword Fight to American History.
Ill spare you folks the details. You get the point, er, I mean theme.
FDR promised a chicken in every pot. Trump promises his Mighty Whitey Militia bigger dicks.
If you order now, if you are one of the first 25,000 callers, if you buy into the Mein Trumpf Bowel Movement, you will get, at no extra charge, free shipping, with 3 easy payments of $25,000 each, a certificate of investment, valued at $1,000,000, in Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities LLC, plus another $50,000 certificate of investment in Enron Energies. Plus if you order now, in the next fifteen minutes, we will throw in at no charge, a free week stay at the Trump Miralago Adult Motel, with free XXX movies, mirror over the bed, hot tub and desk call marital aids cleaning service. And for another $10,000, we will send to you a New, Yuge Trump sized Dick. Call now, before the Muslims and Messikins get you. Trust us, you will be safe with The Mein Trumpf New America.
Well, with Ben Carson, a conscienceless predator of infinite and limitless boundaries, nobody can actually foresee what this dumb fuck will say and do next.
Seriously, what I write today about him as a nasty satirical piece, can actually turn into a true story down the road. What we view as the absurd now, these fucks can make real tomorrow. They have no restraints, no sense of knowledge, intelligence, rational, well thought out thinking, nothing. They do not even seem to understand what they say, especially Carson, a totally vapid and vacuous moron.
After reading Hunter's article about Carson saying that Cruz should be Attorney General, just to prosecute Hillary and then be appointed to the Supreme Court, I knew that there was more to the story. Hence this article was written,
]http://www.dailykos.com/story/2016/5/5/1523547/-Ben-Carson-says-Trump-could-let-Ted-Cruz-prosecute-Hillary-then-appoint-him-to-the-Supreme-Court
The stupidity and ignorance of Carson is absolutely mind boggling, the fact that another grown man, one who does run businesses appoints a person of such astounding stupidity to a position of responsibility is almost beyond description.
The only explanation which I can think of, is that Trump knows that the media will give exposure to Carson & whatever he says, no matter how f'n stuuupid it is.
Well, today this article is satire, tomorrow, not so sure.
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Enzyte CEO Steven Warshak named as Trump’s VP (Original Post)
JunkYardDogg
May 2016
OP
I thought the same thing, but I doubt Wozniak would have anything to do with Enzyte or tRump!!
madinmaryland
May 2016
#7
Cirque du So-What
(25,980 posts)1. I have it on good authority that tRump uses Enzyte faithfully
It makes him taller.
JunkYardDogg
(873 posts)3. And when he wears a turtle neck sweater ...
use your imagination
ryan_cats
(2,061 posts)2. Am I the only one
Am I the only one who read that as:
Enzyte CEO Steven Wozniak named as Trumps VP
JunkYardDogg
(873 posts)4. That's the way I wrote it
Ryan
Anything is possible at this point,
after Trump appoints Carson as his advisor to select a VP
Probably Carson saw the idea in the graffiti on one of those pyramiddy grain storage thingees
Cirque du So-What
(25,980 posts)5. It did cross my mind
but I've been conditioned by years of reading DU thread titles rife with typos to give everything a closer look.
JunkYardDogg
(873 posts)6. Well, I've been known to suffer from Brain Fade on occasion
but not spell check, dictionary/thesaurus fade
although I do make up my own words on occasion
ala the esteemed Sarah Palin, a great literary influence on an entire culture
madinmaryland
(64,933 posts)7. I thought the same thing, but I doubt Wozniak would have anything to do with Enzyte or tRump!!
JunkYardDogg
(873 posts)8. You are right
I had to really watch it writing this, that name kept popping up to me as well