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Initech

(100,080 posts) Sun May 22, 2016, 01:25 PM May 2016

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #28: Wheel O’Corruption 4: Age Of Extinction Edition

Last edited Mon May 23, 2016, 04:00 PM - Edit history (10)

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #28: Wheel O’Corruption 4: Age Of Extinction Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! So I went to the KROQ Weenie Roast last week. And the show was so much fun. Garbage stole the show (and Shirley Manson fell off the stage), Blink 182 was great, and Panic! At The Disco covered Queen’s famous hit “Bohemian Rhapsody in its’ entirety. But a bit of an unfortunate thing happened. Can we roll the tape on that?

Yeah in between Panic At The Disco and Empire of the Sun, the Red Hot Chili Peppers made an unfortunate announcement that Anthony Keidis had to be rushed to the hospital and that they couldn’t perform that night. It shocked the crowd but thankfully the almighty Weezer stepped up and really got the crowd going for the final performance that night. But it was still a pretty awesome show. We got a lot of idiocy to cover this week. But first – John Oliver absolutely owned a favorite punching bag of the Top 10 – Maine governor Paul Le Page (who I called the American Rob Ford in a previous edition) :

So we are going to bring back the Wheel O’Corruption for this week’s edition. So where do we begin this week? Well our number one slot is going to go to Citizens United (1). They’re making a batshit crazy new documentary starring Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson that is going to blame Hollywood stars and the flaunting of their sexuality for inspiring middle eastern terrorist groups. Taking the second spot is the Bathroom Police (2). They are turning up the harassment way past 11 this week. Meanwhile the Christian Right (3) is all but declaring a holy war against America’s LGBT community. It also turns out they’re in an awkward spot over Donald Trump’s rise to the top of the GOP flock while Franklin Graham unleashes some good old fashioned fire and brimstone preaching. In the fourth slot is Donald Trump. How could we not talk about all things Trumpenfuror this week? Last week’s returning champion George Zimmerman (5) falls to number 5 this week. The gun sold and he can’t stop being a colossal dick. In the number 6 spot is Alex Jones. He has an absurd claim that Michelle Obama is a guy, while an Infowars guest thinks Hillary Clinton might be coming to kill him. At number 7, Arkansas senator Tom Cotton (7) thinks America doesn’t have enough prisoners. Taking the number 8 slot, we’re going to introduce you to Virginia congressional candidate Mike Webb (8) who got caught with his pants down – both literally and figuratively. In the number 9 slot is Bill O’Reilly (9). He’s doing that GOP thing of attacking feminists again. Sigh. Finally this week we’re going to talk baseball. You guys and gals like baseball? Specifically there was a massive brawl between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Texas Rangers, that was the direct result of last year’s ALDS that we will go into the kind of detail that you expect from the Top 10! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[font size="8"]Citizens United[/font]

Come on everyone let’s say it with me! It’s time for the “Wheel O’ Corruption!!!”

And of course if we had a bigger budget we’d have our own graphics and theme music. The wheel is back everybody!! And yes just like last time I’ll talk about whatever the wheel lands on. But remember that if it lands on the Guacamole option that it costs $1.50 extra. So this week the items on the wheel will be:
- Gun Nuts
- Donald Trump
- Go Directly To Jail
- Clip Without Context
- Guacamole
- 5,000
- Poison
- Poison (The Band)
- Captain America
- Bankrupt
- Satan
- Buy A Vowel
- A Random Trailer
- Food
- Whammy
- Public Relations
- Fire And Brimstone
- Baseball
- VR Headset
- Prison
- Get Out Of Jail Free
- Pornography
- 10,000
- Celebrity Look Alikes
- Fox News
- Double Whammy
- 15,000
- Local News
- Fire & Brimstone
- Rocky
- Sex Scandals
- Racism
- Something random in the news
- ??? (Mystery)
- Florida (Obviously)
- Infowars
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

So let’s get that going! Spin that shit! And it lands on…. Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy…. Stop! And it lands on… Satan!

Spin it again! And it lands on… A Random Trailer. Well this one isn’t so random. Let’s play it first before we get into the first entry this week. Keep in mind that this has some NSFW content:

So Citizens United. You know them as the group that made that ultra conservative fact free Hillary bashing documentary “Hillary: The Movie”. Yes the same group that declared money is free speech and allowed ultra rich conservatives like the Kochs and the Waltons to pour unlimited amounts of money into campaigns. Well now that group is back and they have a documentary starring, of all people, Duck Dynasty’s Phil Robertson. And it’s going to say that ultra Islamic terrorist groups are the product of what happens when you remove God from the picture, and replace it with sex-obsessed pop stars like Miley Cyrus and Justin Beiber. And we all know how well this argument plays out, and it usually plays out extremely poorly. Well here’s what is going on:

“Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson will unveil his Hollywood bashing film “Torchbearers” at the Cannes Film Festival next week, a new report claims.

Robertson has reportedly teamed up with Citizens United to create a documentary that links “Nazis, Boko Haram, Islamist terrorists and abortion with celebrities who like to show off their sexuality like Miley Cyrus, Justin Bieber, Jennifer Lopez, Kim Kardashian West and Kanye,” according to the Daily Mail.

The film makes the connection that these types of things occur when societies cut God and the Bible out of the picture, and you let “mere men” decide what’s right and wrong.

‘If there’s no God, what difference does it make if you’re a mass-murderer or a saint,” he said. “We’ll all be dead soon, so who cares?”

http://dailycaller.com/2016/05/10/duck-dynasty-star-to-unveil-movie-that-bashes-hollywood-at-cannes-video/

OMG!

Their argument is already flawed to begin with! “We’ll all be dead soon so who cares”? Then why are you pushing the godly angle? By your logic we should all just be serial killers or porn stars anyways! And who are these “mere men”? You know the entertainment industry is a business! You don’t have to buy their product! Let alone claim it’s responsible for, I don’t know, Boko Haram, the worst people on earth! Excuse me a minute…

So they made a movie to talk trash about people who make movies. That's not meta or anything. Kevin Smith did the same thing when he made Clerks in 1991. And Clerks II in 2006. And Clerks III in.... whenever that happens. You know what? Before we go any further, you know last week I talked about Phil Robertson’s “radical” bathroom idea (which is not that radical!), but I need to point that out again:

(CNN)Phil Robertson has "got a radical idea" on how to deal with the controversial transgender bathroom bill in North Carolina.
"Men should use the men's bathroom and women should use the women's bathroom," Robertson reportedly recently wrote. "Just because a man may 'feel' like a woman doesn't mean he should be able to share a bathroom with my daughter, or yours. That used to be called common sense. Now it's called bigoted."
http://www.cnn.com/2016/05/10/entertainment/phil-robertson-duck-dynasty-transgender/

Yeah that’s a “radical idea” in his eyes. Does he even know what the fuck the word “radical” means? So he thinks it’s common sense that trans people should not be allowed to use the bathroom of their choosing? A radical idea would be "leave trans people the fuck alone and stop harassing them!". Seriously their lives are already difficult enough, the last thing they need is Christian douchebags dictating to them which bathroom and changing room to use. Really there's more Christian douchebags harassing and threatening trans people than there are of trans people harassing well, anybody. Does he even know that the GOP has essentially declared open season on trans people just needing to pee? WTF???

Let’s continue:

Phil Robertson is diving back into the culture wars. And Lord, is he angry.

The 'Duck Dynasty' reality-TV patriarch's next in-your-face project is 'Torchbearer,' a film being screened next week for distributors at the Cannes film festival.

It's a fire and brimstone look at the decline of Europe and the United States from the viewpoint of an evangelical crusader. And the news from Robertson's perspective is not good.

Robertson says the Roman Empire's bloody debauchery, Robespierre's French Terror, the Nazi genocide, the Khmer Rouge, Boko Haram, the ISIS terror army, and America's embrace of abortion – yes, he goes there – are the predictable results of cutting God out of entire societies.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3582196/Duck-Commander-Phil-Robertson-hit-Cannes-culture-war-movie-says-Kim-Kanye-think-GODS-equates-abortion-advocates-Nazis-shows-grisly-ISIS-murders-Christians-vote-November.html

Explain to me how… the Nazi genocide is linked to “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” like 60 years before it first aired. Please enlighten me oh wise and angry duck hunter. He seems really obsessed with other people’s perversion doesn’t he? But this movie is going to screen at the Cannes Film Festival. Cannes!!! Where this happened:

No shoes? No problem! Julia Roberts proudly left her heels behind at the Cannes Film Festival 2016 red carpet on May 12. The Money Monster actress, who was attending the movie’s premiere, gave the hordes of photographers a huge surprise as she ascended the famed red carpet steps. Though she began the night in peep-toe platform heels, they were nowhere to be seen when she lifted up the hem of her pleated, off-the-shoulder Armani Prive dress to make the climb.
http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-style/news/julia-roberts-explains-why-she-went-barefoot-at-cannes-2016-w206754

But this is my favorite part of the argument:

Robertson strongly believes that if people violate the liberties that God has freely given them, then His wrath will definitely come. Right now, people are "swimming in a sea of depravity," and he hopes that "Torchbearer" will serve as a wake-up call for them to seek God and ask for forgiveness.

"It's impossible to govern the world without God and the Bible. So here we are, so I think maybe hopefully, through this movie, this documentary, we'll change the hearts of some people. That's my goal," he says.

To make the film, Robertson and the rest of the cast and crew travelled to the Coliseum in Rome, visited French Revolution sites in Paris, and walked through the beaches of Normandy and the Auschwitz concentration camp in Poland.

http://www.christiantoday.com/article/phil.robertson.talks.about.latest.film.torchbearer.says.its.eerily.breathtaking/85971.htm

Yes it is!!! It's entirely possible to run a government without the Bible! This notion has only been around the last 40 years! On the world happiness index the highest scoring country is Switzerland and they’re the neutral country! The US is ranked 15th! And we’d be even less under a totalitarian theocracy! I am using way too many exclamation points again!

[font size="8"]The Bathroom Police[/font]

Give it a good strong spin! And… boom! I win 5,000! Of what we still don’t know what that 5,000 is. But it’s 5,000 of something. So… good, I guess? Let’s spin it again! And it lands on… wait for it…. Bathrooms!

You know folks, this bathroom thing is getting ridiculously out of control, Before we begin to get into the shit the bathroom police are doing this week, read this first hand encounter of what exactly happened when a woman tried to use a Target bathroom this week:

I was alone in the restroom. There were two large handicap-access stalls, complete with baby-changing tables, and two regular stalls. I headed all the way down to the farthest single stall, up against the wall, and I sat down to take care of business.

That's when stuff got weird.

The outer door opened, and someone came in. She walked past the three open stalls and stood directly in front of my door. Then she leaned over and placed her eye firmly up against the gap between the door and the frame and stared in at me.
http://www.sheknows.com/living/articles/1120615/target-bathroom

That is just the beginning. The bathroom debate has made it OK for batshit crazy fundies to declare open season on just about anyone using public bathrooms. Like look what happened at a Target last week in Minnesota – and this is supposedly a blue state. And by the way – Wonkette trashes this woman and this line of thinking:

Big sale on Kibbles? Clean-up in aisle 6? No, just kidding, she has a message, which we will transcribe in full because it’s just that bugfuck insane:
Do not be deceived! Target would have you believe with their Mother’s Day displays that they love mothers and children! This is a deception! This is not love! And they’ve proven it by opening their bathrooms to perverted men! I am a mother of 12, and I am very disgusted by this wicked practice!

Target does not protect mothers and children! Mothers, get your children out of this store! Mothers, have enough decency to get out of this store! It’s a dangerous place! This is not loving! What Target has done is very hateful! It’s hateful towards families! It’s hateful towards mothers! It’s hateful towards children!
America, when are you going to wake up? When are you going to stand up for the right things for America? Are you going to let the Devil rape your children, America? It’s time to stand up and have a voice! Instead of bowing to the homosexual perverted agenda that’s taking over this nation! You need to run and flee this place!
I wouldn’t spend a penny of my money here! This is wicked! This is confusion! This is twisted! This is … abominable in the sight of God! It’s evil!!!
http://wonkette.com/601869/crazy-christian-lady-sick-and-tired-of-satan-raping-her-babies-at-target#E7TstJsAvXVrL2vi.99

But just a reminder of the complete lack of logic surrounding this madness – overpopulation is fine and dandy, but a trans man / woman just needing to pee? Why that’s the spawn of Satan! In fact the harassment is continuing at an alarming rate. Here’s more:

A video posted by a Connecticut woman named Aimee Toms is making headlines, after she says a stranger verbally attacked her inside a Walmart bathroom on Friday after mistaking her for being transgender.

Toms, who identifies as cisgender—a term for people who identify with the sex they were assigned at birth—said she was washing her hands, when the woman called her "disgusting" and attempted to order her out of bathroom, the Connecticut Post reports.
http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2016/05/walmart-bathroom-aimee-toms-transgender

So now they’re against donating hair to young girls with cancer? What the fuck has our society come to?

And there’s yet more:

MESQUITE (CBSDFW.COM) – A Forney woman says a Ross department store in Mesquite let a man into the women’s dressing room Monday.

“I was in the dressing room, when we heard a man’s voice,” said Lisa Stickles, who says she quickly told a manager. “She went inside the dressing room, came right back out and called me to the side and told me… he was representing himself as a woman today,” Stickles said.

A customer service representative with Ross would not comment on the alleged incident but said they do not discriminate against the transgender community; adding, customers may use changing rooms that apply to their gender identity.

“What about me? Or my feelings?” said Sickles. “(The manager) told me that if I felt uncomfortable in the dressing room with him there… I’d have to wait until he’s finished.”
http://dfw.cbslocal.com/2016/05/17/shopper-upset-man-allowed-to-use-womens-dressing-room-in-ross/

Your feelings? Your feelings of hate and bigotry??? Go cue the world’s tiniest violin:

And play the Sad Hulk Music while you’re at it.

And by the way remember when I said I’d post an actual fundie sex crime every time they’re obligated to harass an innocent trans person just needing to pee or use a changing facility? Well this is what happened this week:

http://www.nwaonline.com/news/2016/may/11/ex-pastor-in-sherwood-faces-child-porn-/?news-arkansas#/

David G. Reynolds, 40, faces 70 felony counts of distributing, possessing or viewing of matter depicting sexually explicit conduct involving a child, the Sherwood Police Department said in a news release Tuesday.

Police said they were tipped off in January that an Internet account in Sherwood had accessed a social media account that contained "multiple images" of child pornography and exploitation.

And here’s another. It’s getting quite disturbing. It’s almost as if fundies are trying to pass trans people off as a boogeyman while they get away with some of the most horrible shit imaginable. Like this guy in Iowa who stole almost half a million from a charity to pay for his sex addiction:

What’s the best way to fund your sex addiction in a way that no one will suspect? There aren’t a lot of better ways than setting up a Christian charity and embezzling the money. The Associated Press, via The News & Observer, reports that Cedar Rapids, Iowa resident Jon S. Petersen has pleaded guilty to moving $475,000 worth of donations from his Christian nonprofit organization to his personal account to pay for his apparently expensive sex habits.

The 55-year-old Petersen is the president and co-founder of World Ambassadors, Ltd., a group that specializes in offering Christian outreach to international students on college campuses. The AP says that the key piece of evidence against him revolved around “his personal 2013 tax filing, when he failed to report $114,000 diverted from the group as taxable income.
https://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/christian-charity-boss-admits-to-embezzling-475000-in-donations-to-pay-for-his-sex-addiction/

[font size="8"]The Christian Right[/font]

Entering the spin zone! And it lands on…………….. Satan! Hit it!

Spin it again! And it lands on……. Satan again! Seriously! Three times this week! Is the devil possessing the wheel? Maybe I can get a bonus spin out of it?

Let’s try it again, maybe we can get the wheel unstuck. OK my producer is telling me we have the crew coming out to fix it. I’ll just sit here and play Angry Birds while we’re waiting. Can we get some intermission music?

OK we’re back! Let’s try it one more time and see if we can get the wheel unstuck. Spin it! And it lands on……….. wait for it………… fire and brimstone. So this week in response to North Carolina’s controversial HB-2, Franklin Graham is suggesting to America’s Christian community that the anti-LGBT belief is so strong, they should start a holy war and start taking a bullet for their beliefs:

http://www.back2stonewall.com/2016/05/franklin-graham-real-christians-bullet-anti-lgbt-beliefs.html

Crazy as a bedbug Franklin Graham posting on his Facebook page:

“What would you take a bullet for? What are the principles and beliefs that you would not compromise under any circumstances? Even if it meant putting your life on the line? King Nebuchadnezzar who reigned over Babylon issued a decree that everyone worship the golden image he had made. Three men who knew the one true and living God, refused to worship the king’s idol—their names were Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. The king told them, ‘But if you do not worship, you shall be cast immediately into the midst of a burning fiery furnace.’ Here is their bold reply:

“’O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. If that is the case, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and He will deliver us from your hand, O king. But if not, let it be known to you, O king, that we do not serve your gods, nor will we worship the gold image which you have set up’ (Daniel 3:16-18).

But here’s where things get scary. So batshit crazy off the deep end, end times conspiracy theory pastor Rick Wiles has been calling the Obama administration the “command center” of the “homosexual revolution” and saying “Satan will rape your babies”.

“Trunews” host Rick Wiles lit into the Obama administration (or, as he calls it, “the command center of the Obama homosexual revolution”) on Monday over its letter on facility access for transgender students in public schools. Wiles predicted that most parents and school officials will “cave” and “sacrifice their children at the altar of sexual perversion,” while those who protest will be “beaten in the streets with batons” and “hosed down with firehoses.” “I’m going to tell you where I think we’re going: civil war,” he said. “I believe this is the opening shot from Obama for civil war.” He added: “I’m not calling for violence. I’m calling for massive civil disobedience. Shut down the system. My God, what do we have to do? They’re coming after your innocent children! Just when do you get off of your fat rear end and do something? I’m so sick and tired of these cowards in the churches. Lazy, worthless cowards! They’re coming for your children! They’re coming right into your schools to pervert your children!” This led Wiles to go on a birther-tinged rant about how President Obama (and Satan) intend to “rape your children”:

- See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/rick-wiles-obama-and-satan-will-rape-your-children#sthash.rnTMYqJN.dpuf

What are these people smoking? Maybe a combination of meth and bath salts?

And here’s where things get certifiably insane. Batshit crazy end times conspiracy theory pastor John Hagee said that Americans would incur the “wrath of God” if they didn’t vote for Trump. Actually, we probably will incur God's wrath by voting for Donald Trump.

If you recall previous elections, Hagee was actually turned down an endorsement offer by John McCain for basically saying the same thing!

http://www.addictinginfo.org/2016/05/18/john-hagee-vote-for-trump-or-face-the-wrath-of-god-video/

It’s funny how extreme right-wing Christians always think they know what their God is thinking about politics, especially since most of the candidates who say that God told them to run for president never even get the nomination, much less become president. Well, another such right-wing Christian has added his voice to this narrative: Pastor John Hagee. On the Tuesday edition of his show Hagee Hotline, the fiery preacher issued a dire warning: Vote for Donald Trump in November, or God will come for you. Hagee warned that “God will not hold us harmless,” and that voting is an imperative duty. He continued to rant:

“I’m going to vote for the candidate that’s going to make the U.S. military great again. I’m going to vote for the party that is going to solve the immigration problem, not the one that has created the immigration problem. I’m going to support the party that brings jobs back from China … I’m not going to vote for the party that has betrayed Israel for the past seven years.”

But things got even crazier on Rick Wiles’ show when they just said “fuck it” and started making shit up about campaign finance laws and constitutional term limits. Before I get into this one did anyone see Bill Maher’s new rules last week on “smug liberals” who “want facts”? That was a great one. Let’s roll tape on that!

Now let’s roll the tape on Zack Drew shall we?

Zack Drew, the co-host of “The Jim Bakker Show,” hosts his own program called “Revelation In The News,” where this week he read a prophecy from 2011 in which God told a man named Mark Taylor about His plans to bring Donald Trump into the White House.
Taylor has told far-right radio host Rick Wiles that God will sicken and even kill people who may get in the way of Trump’s presidential bid. Trump seriously considered running for president in the 2012 election cycle, when Taylor claims that God spoke to him about the prophecy.
While Drew and his co-hosts didn’t necessarily accept the prophecy, they found it quite compelling. But Taylor’s prophecy, as read by Drew, included a message that wasn’t, well, exactly accurate: “The spirit of God says that in this next election, they will spend billions to keep this president in. It will be like flushing their money down the toilet. Let them waste their money for it comes from and it is being used by evil forces at work, but they will not succeed, for this next election will be a clean sweep for the man I have chosen.”
Obviously, Trump did not run for president in 2012, and President Obama was re-elected.
- See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/donald-j-trump-will-be-ushered-white-house-hand-almighty#sthash.maXSu7mK.bOLDTsMU.dpuf

Never thought I’d use a meme with Dr. Phil in it!

And then here’s where a prayer breakfast ended extremely poorly when a Catholic Cardinal told the crowd how god was being removed from society because of these “bathroom bills” (which, um, don’t exist anywhere) :

Recent events in the U.S. are destroying Americans' ability to connect to God, according to Cardinal Robert Sarah, a native of the West African nation of Guinea.

In a keynote address at the National Catholic Prayer Breakfast in Washington, D.C., Tuesday, Cardinal Sarah said that in the United States, "God is being eroded, eclipsed, liquidated," Catholic News Agency reports.

Cardinal Sarah pointed out specific events "in the name of 'tolerance'" that have contributed to this erosion, including "the legalization of same sex marriage, the obligation to accept contraception within health care programs, and even 'bathroom bills' that allow men to use the women’s restrooms and locker rooms."

<snip>
http://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2016-05-18/cardinal-robert-sarah-claims-god-is-being-eroded-eclipsed-liquidated-in-the-united-states

But in the interest of the Top 10, let’s do some top 10 fact checking about LGBT rights in Guinea:

Article 325.
Any indecent act or act against nature committed with an individual of the same sex will be punished by imprisonment of six months to three years and a fine of 100,000 to 1,000,000 Guinean francs. If the act was committed with a minor under 21 years of age, the maximum sentence must be pronounced. If the act was consummated or attempted with violence or attempted violence, the guilty person will be condemned to five to ten years of imprisonment.

<snip>
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_rights_in_Guinea

[font size="8"]Donald Trump[/font]

Spin that shit! And it lands on…. Sweet, I get a bonus spin! Spin it again! Buy a vowel. Sure. I’ll buy a vowel. O please! OK we got 3 letters in place. I’ll solve the puzzle. Um… Top 10 Conservative Idiots. What? That’s wrong? What did I wager? All 5,000? No!!!

Spin it again. Donald Trump. So before we get into all things Trumpenfuror this week, first read this first hand encounter from Melania Trump herself about how they stayed in a “commoner hotel” like the Holiday Inn. This shows you how out of touch they are. I bet they’re readers of Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP blog. I mean where else on the internet is a cure for depression listed as "fly to New York City, stay in a penthouse, get a full back massage, and buy a $1,000 gold covered sundae from Serendipity 3?". Yeah that's right. For a rich person the solution to depression always has to be to find someway to say "fuck you" to poor people, am I not right about that? Because that's exactly what the Trumps did here. “Oh I stayed where the serfs stayed and ate their steam tray breakfast buffets, swam in their community pools and used their bolted down hair dryers when I was done! It was fun!”.

Seriously, where do you even find eggs like that? Getting off track here, read this from NPR about how evangelical voters are in an awkward position because they hate Trumpenfuror:

Donald Trump likes to tout his popularity among conservative Christians, who make up a key voting base within the Republican Party. But even with Trump as the de facto nominee, some evangelicals say they're unsure about voting for him — as a matter of conscience.

At Fort Des Moines Church of Christ, a sign on the front lawn reads, "Abortion is America's Holocaust." Inside, after a rehearsal for Sunday's service, Pastor Mike Demastus sat down to talk about the state of the presidential race. He describes Trump as "morally loathsome."
http://www.npr.org/2016/05/16/478176365/many-evangelicals-are-in-an-awkward-place-with-trump-atop-gop

Yes, Trump is “morally loathsome” according to evangelical voters. Despite all the crap they do and get away with that we’ll cover much later in this edition. “I love the Bible, no one loves the Bible more than I do! I read the best verses and it has the best words!”.

But with that out of the way, what has Trump done this week? Well first he devalued his own golf course:

The Trump National Golf Club in Westchester County, New York, with its lovingly manicured golf course, gently winding streams, stone bridges, 101-foot waterfall and an expansive clubhouse is, according to Donald Trump, reflective of “a true luxury lifestyle.”

Creating such a “memorable club” is not cheap: Trump wrote on a candidate disclosure form that the sprawling 147-acre private club bearing his name is worth “more than $50 million.”

But when it came time to value the property for tax purposes, his lawyers have argued that Trump National is really worth only $1.35 million. The proposed valuation has bewildered officials in the small town of Ossining, who said the new figure would cut Trump’s tax burden by 90 percent and dump that burden on everyone else.
http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/time-donald-trump-undersells-tax-time/story?id=39133709

“Well auditing is for stupid losers! See only winners like me know the real value of things! See, I never heard of this thing called… what’s that accounting term? Depreciation? What’s that?”

But then Trump once again got into it with Megyn Kelly. But this time around, Ms. Kelly turned the tables on Donald Trump and interviewed him the same way he’s treated her in the past:

For all the disgusting insults Donald Trump has lobbed at Fox News Channel anchor Megyn Kelly—from retweeting someone calling her a bimbo, to implying she was on her period while moderating a debate—even the most naïve observer of politics and media in the Age of Trump must have known that tonight was inevitable. And by “tonight,” I don’t just mean a television special—this particular one on the Fox broadcast network, and moderated by Kelly with Trump as her star guest. Equally preordained was the fact that, at a time when Rupert Murdoch, Roger Ailes, and most of the Fox News Channel have made their peace with Trump, Kelly would eventually conduct a fawning, boring, and pointless interview with the presumptive Republican nominee.
http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2016/05/17/megyn_kelly_interviews_donald_trump_and_they_are_in_love.html

But the real Trump fail comes this week when he named a list of 11 judges he would pick to replace Antonin Scalia:

JERSEY CITY, N.J. (AP) — Presumptive Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump has released a list of 11 potential Supreme Court justices he plans to vet to fill the seat of late Justice Antonin Scalia.

Trump's picks include Steven Colloton of Iowa, Allison Eid of Colorado and Raymond Gruender of Missouri.
Also on the list are: Thomas Hardiman of Pennsylvania, Raymond Kethledge of Michigan, Joan Larsen of Michigan, Thomas Lee of Utah, William Pryor of Alabama, David Stras of Minnesota, Diane Sykes of Wisconsin and Don Willett of Texas.
http://elections.ap.org/content/trump-unveils-list-11-potential-supreme-court-justices

Wait! Go back to the list for one minute! Why does Don Willett of Texas stand out on that list? Is it because he compared Donald Trump to Darth Vader? Why yes it is!!!

A Texas judge identified by Donald Trump on Wednesday as one of 11 people he would consider nominating to the U.S. Supreme Court has repeatedly mocked the presumptive Republican presidential nominee on social media.

Texas Supreme Court Justice Don Willett last month likened Trump to "Star Wars" villain Darth Vader in a Twitter post.

"'We'll rebuild the Death Star. It'll be amazing, believe me. And the rebels will pay for it.' —Darth Trump," Willett tweeted last month with a photo of the Death Star, the giant spherical spaceship built to carry a planet-destroying weapon in the first "Star Wars" movie.
http://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-election-trump-willett-idUSKCN0Y92UY?il=0

That is hilarious!

And by the way here’s where a Donald Trump supporter got caught with a gun and child porn. Holy crap!

(CNN)A Maryland man who was elected as a delegate for Donald Trump to the Republican National Convention has been charged with creation and possession of child pornography and possession of an illegal gun and explosives.

A federal grand jury indicted Caleb Bailey on Wednesday, following an investigation led by the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives according to court records.

The indictment alleges between March 2015 and this past January, Bailey attempted to use and did use a minor to engage in sexually explicit conduct to produce child pornography.

http://www.cnn.com/2016/05/19/politics/trump-delegate-child-porn-gun-explosives/index.html

[font size="8"]George Zimmerman[/font]

Spin it!!!!!!!!!! Come on VR headset! Come on VR headset! And it lands on… something random in the news!

A South Carolina man seeking to “get back at” an unfaithful ex-girlfriend is facing criminal charges after a cop caught him spray painting the word "CHEETER" on the woman’s car.

Timothy Lee Trammell, 36, was nabbed Friday after a Union County Sheriff’s Office deputy spotted him vandalizing the auto outside a One Stop convenience store in the town of Jonesville. Trammell’s ex, cops report, works at the business.
http://thesmokinggun.com/buster/graffiti/south-carolina-cheeter-attack-023947

Ya know………… if you’re going to call your girlfriend a cheater, at least learn to spell “cheater” correctly.

Spin it again! Gun nuts. So last week we went into great detail about George Zimmerman’s proposed gun auction to sell the gun he used to kill Trayvon Martin. Well, unfortunately it’s going to sell for six figures. But not before Racist McShootface trolled the auction again (and sadly that wasn’t us) :

Zimmerman, who shot and killed the unarmed black teenager during an altercation at his Florida housing estate in February 2012, looks set to collect $138,900 for the Kel-Tec PF-9 9mm handgun after bidding closed midday on the website unitedgungroup.com.

But the final hour of the auction was disrupted by the reappearance of the type of fake bidders who wrecked Zimmerman’s two previous attempts to cash in on the firearm during auctions last week on a rival website. At one stage on Wednesday the highest offer of $137,600 was in the name of a user called Racist McShootface, whose profile was quickly deleted.

The eventual top bidder was a user named John Smith, whose successful offer was made in the auction’s final minute. No further details were listed for him on the website other than that he claimed to be based in Alabama.
http://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2016/may/18/george-zimmerman-sells-gun-trayvon-martin

So Racist McShootface strikes again ladies and gentlemen! But it did not stop there! In fact it continued. And the final bidder went to a mystery account with the name “John Smith” which has only led to further speculation who the buyer is. But do I need to remind people what Zimmerman plans to spend the money on? Anybody?

In the listing, Zimmerman says a portion of the proceeds would go toward fighting alleged violence against law enforcement by the Black Lives Matter movement and to stop anti-firearm rhetoric made by Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton.
The proceeds will also help pay for efforts to end the career of Angela Corey, who led the prosecution against Zimmerman, according to the post.
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/trayvon-martin-george-zimmerman/os-george-zimmerman-gun-auction-20160512-story.html

Yes. He plans to spend that money to counter Black Lives Matter and to end the career of the woman who led the prosecution against him. Dick move, Zimmerman. And in case you were wondering, he might just be one of the most horrible people on earth.

A defiant George Zimmerman said in an interview published on Tuesday that he still has people seeking to buy the gun he used to kill Trayvon Martin. He also blamed the teen’s parents for their fatal 2012 encounter and accused them of exploiting it.

“They didn’t raise their son right. He attacked a complete stranger and attempted to kill him,” Zimmerman told The Daily Beast, adding, “Sybrina Fulton and Tracy Martin did everything they could to capitalize on her son’s death. She was never a mother figure to him. Tracy Martin couldn’t have cared less about their son. He treated him like a dog without a leash.”
http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/george-zimmerman-smears-trayvon-martins-parents-they-didnt-raise-their-son-right/

Holy shit this guy is a dick. And he has absolutely ZERO right to tell anyone else about how to raise children, let alone the family of the teenager he MURDERED in an alleyway!!!! Go to hell, Zimmerman. You know I had a friend of mine that died unexpectedly from a massive heart attack this time last year. He’s gone. Way too early. And George Zimmerman is somehow still alive and getting rich off killing an unarmed black teenager. What the fuck is wrong with this picture? He should be sharing a prison cell with Martin Shkreli. If we can’t get him for murder, can we at least lock him up when he fails to fully report this income on his tax return next year? After all the photo that accompanies this article looks like something that comes from a Rick Ross video:

Ewwwww… excuse me a minute….

[font size="8"]Alex Jones[/font]

Spin that shit! And it lands on…………. Oh Infowars. You know I hate to keep reporting on Infowars but they keep me coming back because they’re so batshit fucking crazy. They’re like Rush Limbaugh, only add in end times conspiracy theories, a slice of doomsday preppers, and a dash of some good old fashioned fire and brimstone preaching. But what has Alex Jones been up to this week? Well besides saying Michelle Obama is a man. And yes there is video of this. Let’s roll tape:

Right Wing Watch has posted a new clip of Jones talking about the reasons he thinks Michelle Obama is actually transgender. That in itself is pretty crazy, but then he goes off in an amazing new direction by suggesting that the first lady had Joan Rivers killed because she knew the truth about her dark secret.
“Don’t forget, the famous comedienne Joan Rivers said, ‘Of course everyone knows she’s a tranny,'” Jones says in the clip. “She’s dead serious, ‘She’s a man.’ Deader than a doornail in a routine operation where basically she had fire poured down her throat and was a fire-breathing goblin. Dead on arrival. Shoot your mouth off, honey, you will die.”
Things don’t get any less weird from there.
“I really think — her daughters don’t look like her — I really think this is some weird hoax they did again, just like he didn’t get sworn in on the Bible, it was the Quran,” Jones continued. “All this weirdness, I mean, I used to laugh at this stuff, but man, it’s all about rubbing our noses in it. I think it’s all an arranged marriage, it’s all completely fake and it’s this big sick joke because he’s obsessed with transgender, just like some weird cult or something. I think Michelle Obama is a man. I really do. I really do. I believe it.”
http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/heres-why-people-dont-take-right-wing-evangelicals-so-seriously-anymore/

Alex Jones really believes this shit! And I mean it’s definitely not helping the great transgender bathroom debate. Go back to him singing “Dude Looks Like A Lady”. I mean wow, that might be the worst karaoke I’ve ever heard. And killing Joan Rivers?

I mean did you not see this about Giant stores in Washington, DC where a trans woman was actually denied bathroom access by the bathroom police and was subsequently sued by a trans man who was forced to wear a low cut shirt?

A security guard was arrested on Wednesday after harassing a trans woman trying to use the womens’ restroom inside a Washington D.C. grocery store, WRC-TV reported.
The unidentified guard was charged with simple assault after allegedly pushing the woman out of the bathroom inside the store, which is part of the Giant grocery chain.
http://www.rawstory.com/2016/05/d-c-security-guard-arrested-for-blocking-trans-woman-from-using-womens-restroom/

Hey Alex:

But things get even weirder than Alex Jones’ crazy theory that the first lady is a man, I give you the fact that he thinks Hillary Clinton might be trying to kill him! Roll tape!

Before he became Donald Trump‘s political hitman, Roger Stone spent years pushing scathing views about Bill and Hillary Clinton that have ranged from far right to conspiracy theory level. As Clinton and Trump push forward in their fight for the White House, Stone’s now convinced that the former Secretary of State might try to have him whacked.
Stone was asked by his presumptive best friend Alex Jones and Gary Heavin about whether he’s ever feared for his life after speaking out against the Clintons despite the “trail of bodies as far as you can see.” Stone replied that he has increased his security since he started talking about the affairs of the former president, and that his wife might try to have him assassinated.
http://www.mediaite.com/online/trump-ally-roger-stone-is-convinced-he-will-die-by-hillary-clintons-hand/

:crazy

[font size="8"]Tom Cotton[/font]

Spin it to win it! Clip without context!

That’s real. That happened. Spin it again! And it lands on…….. Prison. Come because you got arrested by a cop after an all night bender, stay for the bad food and the workout sessions. I’m being told that joke backfired so I will consult one of the Top 10 lawyers on that one. OK… no more prison jokes for next time. So Arkansas Senator Tom Cotton doesn’t think we lock up enough Americans.

Let’s roll tape on that shall we?

Sen. Tom Cotton (R-Ark.) is criticizing efforts to reform America’s criminal justice system, arguing on Thursday that the country actually has an “under-incarceration problem” — even though the U.S. has the world’s largest prison population.
Cotton gave a speech on criminal justice Thursday at the Hudson Institute, a conservative think tank in Washington, D.C. During his remarks, he argued that policy goals like reducing mandatory minimum sentences, restoring voting rights for felons and reducing barriers to employment for ex-offenders are misguided and “dangerous.”
“The claim that too many criminals are being jailed, that there is over-incarceration, ignores an unfortunate fact: For the vast majority of crimes, a perpetrator is never identified or arrested, let alone prosecuted, convicted and jailed,” Cotton said. “Law enforcement is able to arrest or identify a likely perpetrator for only 19 percent of property crimes and 47 percent of violent crimes. If anything, we have an under-incarceration problem.”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/tom-cotton-criminal-justice_us_573e3305e4b00e09e89e8cad?4zy2dhg5569vhd7vi

OMG. He went there. He actually argued that not enough Americans are locked up. Does he not know of this new thing called Google? America locks up more prisoners than like half of the rest of the world combined! In fact anyone can use Google to look up anything, and we went and found these crime statistics from a 2014 article – it’s slightly outdated but doesn’t mean the facts aren’t there:

1. The United States has 5% of the world's population, but 25% of the world's prisoners.
2. The total incarcerated population in the U.S. is a staggering 2.4 million — a 500% increase over the past 30 years.
3. One in every 108 adults was in prison or jail in 2012.
4. One in 28 American children has a parent behind bars.
5. At the end of 2007, 1 in 31 adults was behind bars, on probation or on parole.
6. Currently, 65 million Americans have a criminal record.
7. There are more people behind bars today for a drug offense than there were in 1980 for all offenses combined.
8. The U.S. spent $80 billion on incarceration in 2010 alone.
9. About as many people were returned to prison just for parole violations in 2000 as were admitted in 1980 for all reasons combined.
10. Parole violators accounted for more than 35% of all prison admissions in 2000. Of those, only one-third were returned for a new conviction; the rest were returned for a technical violation, such as missing a meeting with the parole officer.

https://mic.com/articles/86519/19-actual-statistics-about-america-s-prison-system#.OfWl2rqOA

25% people! An estimated 65 million Americans have criminal records! 65 million!!! That number is staggeringly high, but apparently Mr. Cotton won’t rest until there’s half. OMG. And by the way, remember when John Legend won best song at the Oscars this year? Well the Washington Post did some fact checking and found some truth to his claim about American prisons:

To put it in perspective, that is still about 46 percent of state prisoners who are behind bars for non-violent crimes. With many states struggling with overcrowding in their prisons, governors across the country are looking for ways to lower their incarceration rates, starting with the large populations of non-violent offenders.
Prison reform would make the biggest difference for black Americans. As John Legend alluded to last night, America’s incarceration system is shot through with racial disparities. Some of the worst states are in the Midwest: In places like Wisconsin, Iowa and Minnesota, black people are 10 times more likely to be in state prison or local jail.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/govbeat/wp/2015/02/23/john-legend-is-right-prisons-are-disproportionately-black-the-worst-states-are-some-of-the-whitest/

[font size="8"]Mike Webb[/font]

Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin, shall we? And it lands on… come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy stop!! No a whammy!!!

Spin that shit again! And it lands on… porno!

More specifically… we go to Virginia for this story. So in Virginia Congressional candidate Mike Webb was caught with his pants down – and in this case quite literally. And this is a guy who’s running on record to “restore accountability” and “create jobs”. Well after seeing this screen shot that he meant to post on Twitter, we know what kind of jobs he wants to create, if you know what I’m saying.

Mike Webb is a conservative candidate for the United States Congress (VA-8) and he’s hoping to bring “responsiveness and accountability” to Washington, D.C.

He is campaigning with a hands-on approach, insisting he does all of his own social media:

Unfortunately for Mike Webb, he’s probably now wishing he had someone running his social media. He shared a screenshot of his computer screen while trying to make a point (that was partial conspiracy theory) about trying to find employment and he forgot to close out a couple of tabs;
http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/5/16/1527124/-Conservative-congressional-candidate-shares-screenshot-forgets-to-close-porn-windows

Can we throw that screen shot up there?

And let’s zoom in on that:

Yes!!! He’s creating work for… sexy amateurs and tight bodies. I can imagine him as a strip club DJ – “Coming up next we have the lovely Layla ladies and gentlemen! Layla to the stage! Yes her name is just like the Eric Clapton song!”

Oh and this is my favorite part! You want to know what Mr. Webb’s excuse for the porn flub actually was? This is too fucking good!

“Curious by nature, I wanted to test the suggestion that somehow, lurking out in the pornographic world there is some evil operator waiting for the one in a gazillion chance that a candidate for federal office would go to that particular website and thereby be infected with a virus that would cause his or her FEC data file to crash the FECfile application each time that it was loaded on the day of the filing deadline, as well as impact other critical campaign systems,” Webb said in a characteristically lengthy message that also included accusations of malfeasance against some critics and local Republican party members.

https://www.arlnow.com/2016/05/17/webb-i-was-testing-porn-sites-for-viruses/

Yes!!! Ladies and gentlemen! He was testing for viruses! And let’s not overlook Symantec saying that you’re more likely to get a virus on a religious site than on a porn site. Well done! Take a bow!

[font size="8"]Bill O’Reilly[/font]

Spin that shit! Where does the wheel land? Nobody knows! Ah it lands on Poison (The Band)! Finally we get to see what that one brings, shall we?

No… wrong Poison. Ah there we go!

Spin it again! And it lands on… Fox News. So now even the GOP’s biggest mouth piece – Fox News – is slowly warming up to the idea of a Donald Trump presidency. Even Bill O’Reilly is warming up to the idea that Donald Trump could actually be our next president! In fact you might remember from a couple of weeks ago when he freaked out after a reporter slammed him for giving Trumpenfuror some fair coverage. Can we roll tape on that?

I’ve never seen O’Reilly freak out the way he did when confronted with the plain fact that he’s giving Trump favorable coverage.
And notice his defense – he doesn’t deny that they gave him more coverage, but he actually says that Trump insulting people is “newsworthy” because it gets the network higher ratings.
But according to numbers and statistics, who are probably biased, Fox News is now being beat by CNN in a way they haven’t seen in fourteen years.
http://www.thepoliticalinsider.com/watch-bill-oreilly-freak-guest-slams-trump-bias/

Yes the “fair and balanced” Fox News is now getting beat by CNN!

But here’s where O’Reilly might be taking things a bit too far in his quest to defend Trumpenfuror. Maybe he’s going for a position to lead the WH Press Corps under Trump’s administration? Especially when he spouts sexist nonsense like this?

WOODWARD: Yeah. I didn't think it was one of their finest articles.

O'REILLY: Wait, wait. If I'm an editor and I know there is a feminist woman in my newsroom, who is brilliant because I think this woman is an excellent reporter, I don't let her report on a guy like Trump because Trump is the antithesis of that. And so I don't want any margin of error here, there are plenty of reporters who can do the story, do you not see that?

WOODWARD: Yeah, look, I really disagree. There are feminists on the left and the right as you know, and somebody can put their personal feelings and conclusions in their back pocket and keep them there.
https://mediamatters.org/video/2016/05/17/bill-oreilly-feminists-should-not-be-allowed-report-trump-because-trump-antithesis-feminism/210470

Wow. So women can’t question the almighty Trumpenfuror’s stance on feminism because he is the antithesis of feminism. Does that mean I can’t question the actions of Christian leaders and batshit crazy talk show hosts because I’m the antithesis of Christianity? Well let’s ask Trumpenfuror himself what one of his positions on feminism is, shall we?

In a New York Times profile of Donald Trump‘s campaign, the candidate walked back his comments to MSNBC’s Chris Matthews that women should receive “some form of punishment” if they seek an abortion, saying he actually wanted women to punish themselves.

“I didn’t mean punishment for women like prison,” he said. “I’m saying women punish themselves. I didn’t want people to think in terms of ‘prison’ punishment. And because of that I walked it back.”

But the Times reporter Robert Draper dug around and got the real story. Trump “initially saw nothing wrong with his remark and refused to walk it back,” and issued a short noncommittal statement. Trump suddenly changed his mind when he was swamped with questions and requests for comment from over a hundred media outlets
http://www.mediaite.com/print/trump-when-i-said-punishment-i-meant-women-should-punish-themselves-for-abortion/

“Well see only stupid losers have abortions! I’m a winner. I don’t have any. There will be no abortions under my America! We’re going to build walls around every Planned Parenthood clinic in America. They will be the best walls! And they will keep the abortionists out! We will make America great again!”

[font size="8"]Blue Jays V. Rangers: Dawn Of Justice[/font]

Let’s spin the wheel one last time this week! And it lands on… come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy stop! And it lands on… Rocky! Hit it!

Spin it again! And it lands on…………………….. wait for it……………… baseball! So what does Rocky have to do with baseball you might ask? More specifically there’s a really fucked up thing that happened last Sunday during a game between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Texas Rangers. I didn’t see it, too busy watching Captain America: Civil War. Awesome movie. But anyway let’s roll tape and then we’ll explain everything in much greater detail!

Well it started out well. Just a simple base running before all hell breaks loose. So here’s what happened exactly. Let’s get the play by play break down:

Here's what happened in the latest installment: Matt Bush, who was not part of the Rangers' organization last October, hit Bautista in the lower back with a 97 mph fastball to start the inning immediately after the Rangers had taken the lead. Bautista barked at Bush. Home plate umpire Dan Iassonga jumped in between, shuffled Bautista to first and issued warnings to both benches. The umpiring crew was well aware of the possibility of tension. Crew chief Dale Scott was the crew chief in last year's ALDS.
Then Bautista decided to exact his own revenge with a hard take-out slide at second base following Justin Smoak's grounder to the left side. He cut out Odor's feet, instituting a slide that was later deemed illegal. As they both got up, Odor shoved Bautista and both started to ball up fists. Odor got the right cross in, connecting solidly with Bautista's jaw.
http://sportsday.dallasnews.com/texas-rangers/rangers/2016/05/15/grant-bautistas-bat-flip-odors-fist-accusations-sent-flying-rangers-blue-jays-emotional-rivalry

So Jose Bautista got hit by a pitch and that started the whole brew ha ha. I mean it’s nice to go to a baseball game and get some bonus hockey thrown in for good measure, am I not right about that? Well there’s more. So the feud stemming between the Rangers and Blue Jays starts back at the 2015 American League Division Series. Let’s go back to that:

Toronto rallied in the 53-minute seventh for a 6-3 victory to advance to the Championship Series, but not before having to recoup after a crazy top half of the inning.
“It was just a shame that might have been the difference in a game of this magnitude,” Blue Jays manager John Gibbons said. “Thank God it didn’t come down to that.”
With Rougned Odor at third base and two outs in the top of the seventh, Martin’s throw back to the mound appeared to hit the hand of batter Shin-Soo Choo, allowing Odor to sprint home as the ball rolled up the third base line for a 3-2 lead.
http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/video-bizarre-error-rangers-lead-game-5-alds-article-1.2397671

Now I must admit that when I saw that game last year – as a die hard LA Angels fan, I committed a severe case of schadenfreude cheering for the Blue Jays against the evil Rangers, and enjoyed watching the Rangers get taken down a peg by Jose Bautista. *David Puddy from Seinfeld voice* Yeah you gotta respect the game. Gotta respect the team! But here’s where things are going incredibly south. Even 3 days later, Rougned Odor said he has “no regrets” about sucker punching Bautista:

Don Cherry doesn’t think Jose Bautista should have flipped his bat after his home run against the Texas Rangers in last year’s American League Division Series.
But he doesn’t think the Rangers should have waited so long to show their disapproval, either.
Cherry, talking on his Coach’s Corner segment during the first intermission of Game 2 of the Eastern Conference final between Tampa Bay and Pittsburgh, called the Rangers “gutless” for throwing a pitch at Bautista during his last at-bat of Sunday’s game.
The game was the final one of the regular season between the two teams, who had played each other six times before that.
http://news.nationalpost.com/sports/mlb/don-cherry-calls-texas-rangers-gutless-for-delayed-retribution-over-jose-bautista-bat-flip

One thing you got to like about Odor – 1. He’s got balls. 2. He clearly doesn’t give a shit! In fact he wins our Brass Balls award this week.

But the MLB handed down the suspensions this week! In fact what did Bautista and Odor get for that fight?

Texas Rangers second baseman Rougned Odor received an eight-game suspension for punching Toronto Blue Jays slugger Jose Bautista on Sunday, Major League Baseball announced Tuesday. Bautista received a one-game ban for his actions and postgame comments.
In total, 14 players and staff were disciplined for their roles in the brawl at Globe Life Park in Arlington, Texas.
Rangers shortstop Elvis Andrus was suspended one game for his "aggressive actions during the incident." Andrus served his suspension Tuesday in Oakland.
http://espn.go.com/mlb/story/_/id/15577350/rougned-odor-texas-rangers-suspended-8-games-punching-toronto-blue-jays-jose-bautista

Fuck that! Somebody call the UFC and put Bautista and Odor in an octagon and let them work out their frustrations there! They can make a mint off the pay per view sales!