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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forums5 States To Decide Whether To Legalize Marijuana Or Continue Honoring God
WASHINGTONCarefully weighing the pros and cons of their respective ballot measures before casting their votes, citizens in five states are set to decide tomorrow whether to legalize recreational marijuana or continue honoring God, sources confirmed Monday.
Constituents in California, Maine, Massachusetts, Arizona, and Nevada will have the choice tomorrow between advancing their pursuit of a godly life by adhering to Christs teachings and experiencing the glory of the Heavenly Fathers word, or allowing themselves and their neighbors to lawfully smoke marijuana, said political analyst Kevin Phillips, who explained that while the advantages of passing these measures, such as bolstering the local economy and reducing prison overcrowding, could be substantial, they must be closely compared to the benefits of living in the light of the Divine Creators everlasting love.
After years of grassroots movements, voters will finally make this momentous choice for themselves: They can either permit adults over the age of 21 to use cannabis without legal consequence, or they can continue living in accordance with He who has made us in His own image and receiving Gods grace forever and ever.
At press time, the latest polls showed that the legalization of recreational marijuana and acceptance of an eternity of hellfire for forsaking the Almighty could potentially pass in all five states.
http://www.theonion.com/article/5-states-decide-whether-legalize-marijuana-or-cont-54608
iemitsu
(3,888 posts)Warpy
(111,277 posts)from the ones who mutilate women to the ones who declare some plants illegal: "does your god make mistakes?"
It seems their god does blunder much of the time and needs his believers to clean up after him.
One wonders why they bother to affect piety.
iemitsu
(3,888 posts)cilla4progress
(24,737 posts)God's country! Legalized pot's been no problem here!
Aristus
(66,391 posts)I tell you, the wingnuts out there, and the legislation they promulgate, you can never tell...
I thought it was "the real deal" until I saw it was from the Onion. It did sound like something the "holier than thou" wing nuts would say, though.😳
mike_c
(36,281 posts)...and FEEL THE SPIRIT!
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)come on. Who do you think invented it in the first place?
http://www.cannabisculture.com/content/1996/05/01/1090
Mendocino
(7,495 posts)One toke over the line
Sitting by the Jordan River rolling doobies all the time
One toke over the line
Had a blunt with sweet sweet Mary
Hope the pizza comes on time
John the Baptist likes bong water
He drinks it all the time
Oh no here comes Officer P. Pilate
Wants to bust JC with a crime
So I'm just waiting for the second coming
Burning one to pass the time
ProfessorGAC
(65,078 posts)That comparison could be made to nearly every ballot initiative. How convenient.
anarch
(6,535 posts)"And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat."
just sayin'
Doc_Technical
(3,526 posts)does this quote mean that we can't smoke sensimilla ?
CBGLuthier
(12,723 posts)Seriously, we have one SQ to remove a clause in our state constitution that limits money being spent on religion. Meanwhile, the medical marijuana initiative was stalled by the asswipe AG and will be on an upcoming election.
Kind of a shit deal. Citizens get enough signatures then the AG rewrites the question so it barely resembles what was petitioned for and after the legal wrangling too late for this election. Shenanigans as usual. Fucking shenanigans.
Calculating
(2,955 posts)He wouldn't have put it here. Religious people against cannabis need to do a little critical thinking.