"I don't know what you mean, a Russian quid pro quo? . . . I know some Russian golf pros. . . . Is that the same?"

It rained. It rained. Water fell from the sky. A yuge amount of water. We call that rain. Where I'm from it's called rain. The weatherman, a woman really...why are they called a weatherman when they're mostly women. I don't get it. Maybe they cause it to rain, women. The women in Russian they cause it to rain, believe me I've seen them rain. But the rain...it's in Florida and its raining. Now I'm at Mar-largo, golfing, I got a new club. A Tiger Woods signature golf club. That guy can really drive so I bought it, I bought it. I'm kidding...it was a gift. I didn't buy it. When you're president people give you things. I got a gold medallion from the King of the Middle East. He's a king. That's great. I want to run for king. It would be fun. Lot of sand there though, hard to golf in the sand. So it's raining and I say, hey Peyton, because I'm golfing with Peyton Manning. He golfs with me, Tom Brady doesn't show up anymore, what's wrong Tommy? Too much winning? Peyton now he lost a lot so he needs a winner like me. He golfs with me, Tom, he's a no show. No show Tommy I call him now. Total loser. So we, Peyton and me because I'm golfing with Peyton Manning, total winner, I say, Peyton you want to go golfing but it's raining. So we eat chocolate cake. That's a true story. Oh I almost forgot, but I didn't forget. I remember why we're here. That's why we're leaving the Paris thing. We're leaving. It's over. I hope there are no questions because I think I've answered them all. Okay, am I'm done now?

or you'll be putting your therapist's children through college, including graduate degrees.

"I could rape Honey Boo Boo while giving an abortion to a prepubescent welfare queen, and they'd still want to f*ck me, . . . not to put too nice a spin on it."

The Mayor of London is a loser. I'm not going to ignore the facts. His country is not the best and has some bad hombres in it. America is a better, biglier country with more covfefe.