But the taxpayers want to be sure their money is being spent wisely and not just to let you and the other folks in Congress get some mooching freebies. We're just concerned for your well-being, and don't want you to become dependent on government handouts to get by. So, here's the dealio:

It has to be unanimous. Every member of Congress has to re-certify every year that they have their grimy little paws out for this extra $2,500 a month, no exceptions. Equal treatment under the law, you know. Second, you and every member of Congress, House and Senate, have to produce a specimen for urinalysis on demand taken at random times. Anyone who can't or won't pee in a bottle, or who tests positive (even a so-called "false" positive) loses the benefit and has to pay back every penny collected. We the people don't want our tax dollars wasted on drug addicts. Any failure will be deemed possession of a controlled substance, subject to immediate arrest and prosecution to the fullest extent by Attorney General Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III. If it's good enough for civilian wrong-doers, it's good enough for members of Congress, right?

If these terms are acceptable, sign right here, Congressman. Another 534 signatures and we'll be all set to go.

a housing allowance as well. It is expensive to live there and/or the commute is hell. Currently federal workers don't get a housing allowance and the majority of them are not millionaires when they leave their federal job. Besides most federal workers don't make nearly what members of Congress do, or political appointees, and they probably have as much education and experience if not more then some members of Congress. No all members of Congress are lawyers, but they all get the same pay except for leadership members. Members of Congress also have a better pension plan than federal workers as they get a larger credit for each year of service and can draw their pension sooner. They have free parking at the Capital, a free gym, a dining facility, and some sleep in their offices. The majority of them are re-elected even though they have little accomplishment during any given session. That which they are constitutionally required to accomplish, i.e. pass a budget by a certain date, rarely happens, and congressional oversight of agencies is a partisan joke. Those who don't live in the district, travel to and from home on Mondays and Fridays at taxpayer expense and receive per diem for travel days.

They are overpaid for what they actually accomplish, which is why so many of them hang around for as long as they do until they have to take them out on a stretcher (i.e. John McCain, Bob Dole, Jeff Sessions, Strom Thurman to name a few).

The congressman/senators were paid only 10-15% more than the average income of theirr state and that the housing allowance only covered the time that they are in session. I don't think it's fair that a congressman from poor Mississippi should be paid as much as one from richer California. This would incentivize the poorer state's representatives to work harder for their state.

Am I kidding? Maybe a little

Go fuck yourself!