Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

Are_grits_groceries

(17,111 posts)
Sat Jul 14, 2012, 10:24 AM Jul 2012

The Deadspin 5 point plan to punish PSU and not shut down the FB program: (NSFW language)

<snip>
HOWEVER, we at Deadspin do not endorse such extreme measures. Nor do we consider the abolition of PSU football to be a good idea. And it's not because we think that it would unjustly punish the current players or coaches. Fuck them. I could give a shit about their feelings. The problem is that if you abolish PSU football, you're essentially giving the school the martyr complex it so desperately craves. You're giving the school a reason to become even more embittered and more insular. The cries of injustice would instantly override any lingering sadness and shame stemming from Joe Paterno's death and the Freeh Report. You don't want that. You don't want Penn State to become even more warped than it already is.

Furthermore, getting rid of Penn State football means giving it an unjustified clean slate once it returns. You can already see the narrative coming. That first win for Penn State after their return from the death penalty will be treated like fucking Hoosiers. There will be any number of soft-focus Tom Rinaldi pieces about the program rising from the ashes. THE FEEL-GOOD STORY OF THE SPORTS YEAR. That one- or two-year death penalty would essentially serve as a shortcut to the program's redemption. They wouldn't have to do much of anything to generate a decent comeback narrative. They'd just simply have to begin existing again. And Penn State doesn't deserve such shortcuts. That's why, instead, we offer the following five-step plan.

(Read the details for each point)
1. Keep playing football. With one caveat...
2. No more Grand Experiment. That phrase alone makes me wanna throw up in a sand bucket. No more hypocrisy. No more pretending you're better than anyone else
<snip>
3. Change the school name. Pennsylvania Tech. Remember when ValuJet had that crash that killed Rodney Culver and everyone was like, "Fuck that, I'm never flying ValuJet again"? And then they changed their name to AirTran and everything was hunky dory (except for the fact that AirTran kinda blows)? That's you, Penn State.
<snip>
4. Sell out. The Paterno Library becomes the Verizon Library Built By The Home Depot. And we can finally pick up those swooshes on the jerseys and slap them right on the helmets. With a bunch of little swoosh stickers on the back for every slobberknocker hit: I JUST DID IT®! No more of this, "Our uniforms are simple because we're good simple folk" bullshit.
<snip>
5. The first person to cry out WE ARE PENN TECH gets tased. That's just common sense. It's gonna big a big change for you old PSU fans, but I think you'll comforted by the fact that you still have a football program, and that your football program will never again have its head up its own ass.
http://deadspin.com/5925757/the-deadspin-five+point-plan-to-rescue-penn-state-football

This IS punishment.

Latest Discussions»General Discussion»The Deadspin 5 point plan...