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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsHarvey Weinstein and the Imaginary Boyfriend
BY LINDSAY ZOLADZ
Since I was 18 years old, Ive had a fake boyfriend named Scott.
I was on my way to his apartment late one night about four years ago when a drunken stranger lunged at me on the street. Beautiful! he slurred. Can I come home with you? Please let me come home with you. I evaded his grasp (easily, because he could barely stand), though Im amazed I was able to move at all since my entire body was trembling. Im on my way to my boyfriends house! I yelled at him. Scotts!
In truth, I was standing just across the street from my apartment and my roommate was out of town. I knew I couldnt go home right then, because then this man would know where I lived, so I walked in a long loop around my neighborhood for about 10 minutes. He followed me for several blocksalmost every woman I know has adapted a sixth sense for knowing when theyre being followedand when I was sure I had lost him, I went home alone. I locked every door and window. I checked twice.
I mentioned Scott once in a supermarket. Id been picking up a few things on my way home from the gym, and I had noticed that a shifty man seemed to be following me around the store. He finally approached me in the frozen-food aisle. He asked my name, gave me an uncomfortable compliment about my yoga pants, and asked me out. I found him creepy but, for some reason, worried about offending him. Enter Scott. Ah, sorry, Im seeing someone, I said. I wasnt, but I didnt feel like letting him know that. He didnt ask my boyfriends name, but of course, if he had, I would have had it on the tip of my tongue.
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https://www.theringer.com/movies/2017/10/12/16463326/harvey-weinstein-accusations-mira-sorvino-imaginary-boyfriend
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)Thank you for posting. It is one of the best pieces I have read on this matter. I have gone through this endless times in many different forms and it has made me angry all over again at how many times I have had to endure this aggression and sense of entitlement.
Dave Starsky
(5,914 posts)This is a book that everyone should read. He's a world renowned security specialist who has worked with celebrities, Supreme Court justices, and other notables worldwide.
He goes into depth on all the many subtle ways you can protect yourself from predators, chief among them just listening to your "little voice" telling you that something is just not right, and resisting that overwhelming impulse to "be polite" when the situation calls for it.
It is literally one of the best books I've ever read.
WhiskeyGrinder
(22,385 posts)Which goes to show how they think about women.
Orsino
(37,428 posts)Or we might say that in seeking to intimidate a woman weaker than themselves, they can be put off by the invocation of a rival male.
TeapotInATempest
(804 posts)a fake phone number.
Of course, it didn't always help. One man was very, very persistent when I was (clearly) 8 months pregnant!
safeinOhio
(32,713 posts)Have been the story of my life.