(Apologies to Charlene)

Hey lady, you lady
cursing at your life
you're a discontented working mom
and a regimented wife
I 've no doubt
you dream about the things you never do
but I wish someone had a talk to me like I wanna talk to you

Oh, I've been to Georgia and California and anywhere I could shop
Took the hand of a Mormon man
and we made love in the sun
But I ran out of places and friendly faces
Because my husband is on the campaign trail
I've been to paradise, sailing on the USS Regale...

Please lady please lady
don't just walk away
Cause I have this need to tell you
why you're all alone today
You ask too much for the work you do
living wages is just for the guys
still bitter on your part
you're a weary heart that has worked a million lives

Oh, I've been to Nice and the isle of Greece
when I sipped champagne on a yacht
I moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo
and showed them what I've got
I have diamond rings
and I've seen some things that woman ain't s'pose to see
I've been to paradise, sailing in the Caribbean sea...

Hey, you know what paradise is?
It's a live in nanny
Not a fantasy we create about people and places
as we like them to be
but you know what truth is?
it's that little baby Consuelo's holding
and it's that man you fought with this morning
the same one you are gonna make love to tonight
that's truth that's love

Sometimes I've been to crying for unborn children
that might have made me complete
but I, I took the sweet life
I never knew I'd be bitter from the sweet
I spent my life exploring
the subtle whoring
that costs too much to be free
hey lady I've been to paradise
but I've never been to me...

...not by cashing in their retirement 401(k)'s early or running up credit card debt, right Mrs. Romney?

There, you admitted it. Now STFU.

And Mr. Mittens HIMSELF said just three months ago that raising kids isn't a real job, or worthy of a check.

How I wish they'd both just STFU and go live happily in Mormon-infused bliss off of their filthy lucre derived from suffering Americans. But NO. Mitty insists on fighting for the crown of SuperAmericanMotheFucker. He won't be happy till he outdoes his pappy.

They are a couple of tragically tedious bores.

.... OMG they had to walk to class? Mitt and Ann really walked through a
hell hole of the regular folks?

Somebody ask them if they know what Ramen noodles are.