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You are trapped! Your only weapon is the object at your left. What do you defend yourself with? (Original Post) Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 OP
a salad! unblock Dec 2017 #1
I fear you are doomed! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #30
the reign of the caesar lasted centuries! unblock Dec 2017 #41
I kick my buddy in the shin and run! He has to use the bong to defend himself! n/t brewens Dec 2017 #35
An old-fashioned swiveling piano stool. The Velveteen Ocelot Dec 2017 #2
Stool is indeed an offensive weapon. Orrex Dec 2017 #11
Thatll work! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #31
Contago greymattermom Dec 2017 #3
Hope its a big one! 😏 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #32
spit! samnsara Dec 2017 #4
Doomed! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #33
A Venetian blind. Thirties Child Dec 2017 #5
Could be curtains for you! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #34
Nightstand and a glass of water Tiggeroshii Dec 2017 #6
Could work! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #36
three yesphan Dec 2017 #7
Well, at least your attack will have appeal. Orrex Dec 2017 #12
Ha ! yesphan Dec 2017 #28
Slip sliding away! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #38
a phone Lifelong Protester Dec 2017 #8
Has possibilities! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #39
A mirror and a 4yr old dewsgirl Dec 2017 #9
Throw the 4yr old as a decoy and make a run for it. Ron Obvious Dec 2017 #26
I was thinking I was screwed, thanks 😉 dewsgirl Dec 2017 #51
Do as Ron says! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #40
A lamp and a Japanese Chin curled up in a ball JDC Dec 2017 #10
Toss the Chin at him then bust his noggin with the lamp! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #57
I'm gonna stab my buddy in the leg and run DashOneBravo Dec 2017 #13
Good plan! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #58
HP LaserJet M1522 Shrek Dec 2017 #14
Bummer! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #59
I pinch myself and wake up. After all, it's got to be just a nightmare. Binkie The Clown Dec 2017 #15
Doomed! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #60
I certainly hope that it's mightier than the sword Orrex Dec 2017 #16
Could work! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #61
I've got blank paper to my left - maybe we could work together Marie Marie Dec 2017 #97
A shower curtain Adsos Letter Dec 2017 #17
Doomed! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #62
Electric stapler? AzureCrest Dec 2017 #18
Has potential! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #64
Bottle of Motrin jberryhill Dec 2017 #19
You may want to down the whole thing! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #66
A stack of papers Sanity Claws Dec 2017 #20
The silver lining! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #68
a red swing line stapler DBoon Dec 2017 #21
Might work! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #69
A cup of coffee. Arkansas Granny Dec 2017 #22
Drink quickly! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #100
2 sleeping cats. nt irisblue Dec 2017 #23
Appetizers! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #104
Cats, the new tapas.🙎 irisblue Dec 2017 #112
A box cutter atreides1 Dec 2017 #24
Might work! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #105
Toilet paper d_r Dec 2017 #25
So now we all know where you are. Doreen Dec 2017 #93
Oh crap! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #106
A calico cat. cloudbase Dec 2017 #27
The cat is the treat! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #107
A pillow. dawg day Dec 2017 #29
Same here. Just a throw pillow Roland99 Dec 2017 #53
You aint wrong! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #108
My terrier matt819 Dec 2017 #37
I've a sleeping 4lb chihuahua. We're doomed! NightWatcher Dec 2017 #46
Terrier! Yum! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #109
A TV with muted Donald J. Trump MuseRider Dec 2017 #42
Theyll ignore him! Theyre looking for brains! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #113
LOL MuseRider Dec 2017 #129
Roll of Charmin benld74 Dec 2017 #43
Crap! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #115
Point to the shiny object on my right Deb Dec 2017 #44
Doomed! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #116
A lovely knitted throw AJT Dec 2017 #45
You just may have the situation covered! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #117
I don't have much to choose from: a mouse, cup of coffee, post-it notes, and a pencil. n/t woodsprite Dec 2017 #47
MacGyver would work wonders with those dlwickham Dec 2017 #49
Use them wisely! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #118
a pair of socks dlwickham Dec 2017 #48
Clean or dirty! 😏 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #119
dirty dlwickham Dec 2017 #130
You have a chance! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #132
A lamp. MrScorpio Dec 2017 #50
A deadly weapon if used correctly! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #120
A pair of headphones. Cheap ones, too. Yikes. mahatmakanejeeves Dec 2017 #52
Despair not! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #121
I'll take on my attacker with a left-right combo. NT mahatmakanejeeves Dec 2017 #122
My 50-pound catahoula doggo. Laffy Kat Dec 2017 #54
Yum! Rotting flesh! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #123
Car door. mac56 Dec 2017 #55
You may want to jump out the window! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #124
Either my office telephone or my lamp. lunatica Dec 2017 #56
A good one! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #125
A salt lamp MontanaMama Dec 2017 #63
Not necessarily! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #133
My purse! I'm in luck! Phentex Dec 2017 #65
Poor zombie! 😢 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #134
a tissue box, Chapstick, a glass of water and empty gum wrapper tymorial Dec 2017 #67
Yep! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #135
I'm in luck Runningdawg Dec 2017 #70
Whoa! You'll live the tell the tale because of the tails.nt Laffy Kat Dec 2017 #71
Negan? Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #136
Nah Runningdawg Dec 2017 #138
A paper coffee cup. geardaddy Dec 2017 #72
Bummer! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #137
My phone. Maybe I can call Liam Neeson Algernon Moncrieff Dec 2017 #73
Hopefully you have him on speed dial! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #139
Table lamp sarge43 Dec 2017 #74
Indeed! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #140
Stereo Headphones Leith Dec 2017 #75
I was wondering that myself, reading through this thread dewsgirl Dec 2017 #83
Oh oh! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #141
To my immediate left right now is a bottle of Tequila pink-o Dec 2017 #76
You could do shots! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #144
My knitting needles! NanceGreggs Dec 2017 #77
Think youll have time to knit it a sweater? 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #145
Guess I'd need to feed him my delicious roast beef sandwich and then hit him over the head with skylucy Dec 2017 #78
Good luck! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #146
A faux polyester fur blanket. applegrove Dec 2017 #79
Sorry! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #147
America's Pencil: Corvo Bianco Dec 2017 #80
#2 will do! ✏️👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #148
A box of Christmas cards/envelopes I'm addressing. eom Frustratedlady Dec 2017 #81
A task youll never have to do again! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #149
Walbash blue's Walbash Blues Dec 2017 #82
Might work! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #150
My Assisted Opening Tac Knife ProfessorGAC Dec 2017 #84
Absolutely! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #151
A couch pillow rownesheck Dec 2017 #85
Ouch! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #155
Knitting needle crazycatlady Dec 2017 #86
+100000😉 irisblue Dec 2017 #89
Poor zombie! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #156
LOL! A 22 pound long haired Maine Coon?? raven mad Dec 2017 #87
Ah! An hors doeuvre! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #158
Well I have a 40 cal. Springfield semi-auto loaded with 17 rounds in the night stand doc03 Dec 2017 #88
Of course! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #159
My nephews red ryder bb gun and Watchfoxheadexplodes Dec 2017 #90
Youll shoot your eye out! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #160
Earl Grey tea, I suppose. Codeine Dec 2017 #91
You could invite him for a cuppa and a bite! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #161
My cat Taffy. trueblue2007 Dec 2017 #92
Can't see her picture irisblue Dec 2017 #154
Sounds tasty! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #162
i hope this works now...... TAFFY trueblue2007 Dec 2017 #185
My TV remote control csziggy Dec 2017 #94
See ya! Wouldnt want to be ya! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #163
A heavy floor lamp with thick glass and my cell phone. Doreen Dec 2017 #95
Thatll do! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #164
Damn, my iPad.. denbot Dec 2017 #96
Sniff! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #165
A bowl. area51 Dec 2017 #98
Uh-oh indeed! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #166
A 16 year old cat! jpak Dec 2017 #99
Oh my! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #167
My fiancee is sitting to my left PJMcK Dec 2017 #101
Youre in for a tough decision! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #168
An empty earplug box. DetlefK Dec 2017 #102
Damn! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #169
A seven-piece manicure set in a "genuine leather made in Korea" case Glorfindel Dec 2017 #103
I suppose you could! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #170
My body is a weapon. malthaussen Dec 2017 #110
Alrighty then! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #172
Reading glasses Sailor65x1 Dec 2017 #111
Dayum ....can I be in your traveling group? irisblue Dec 2017 #114
MacGyver?👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #173
My 9 lb chihuahua . flying_wahini Dec 2017 #126
Mmmmm! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #174
My two Great Pyrenees Bayard Dec 2017 #127
As much as I like dogs! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #175
Desk, nightstand, hockey stick or katana sakabatou Dec 2017 #128
Choose wisely! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #176
A large, velvet covered, feather filled throw pillow. CottonBear Dec 2017 #131
Keep us posted! 🧟‍♂️ Floyd R. Turbo Dec 2017 #177
Ceramic coffee mug blogslut Dec 2017 #142
a mission style table lamp with a HEAVY metal base or my 40 ounce hydro flask. hlthe2b Dec 2017 #143
Desk phone.......I guess I can try to brain it with the hand set. Thomas Hurt Dec 2017 #152
A cinnamon roll Siwsan Dec 2017 #153
Either my laptop or a 44oz cup from Jack In The Box. Initech Dec 2017 #157
a stapler! Javaman Dec 2017 #171
I have an 80 pound Black Lab Mix at my feet janterry Dec 2017 #178
A Fender Telecaster! Still In Wisconsin Dec 2017 #179
I hope you like relics Jeroen Dec 2017 #181
Are you kidding? I AM a relic! Still In Wisconsin Dec 2017 #184
Hmm gibraltar72 Dec 2017 #180
A napkin holder! kairos12 Dec 2017 #182
A million dollar check mainstreetonce Dec 2017 #183
 

Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
26. Throw the 4yr old as a decoy and make a run for it.
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 03:05 PM
Dec 2017

Then check out your relieved expression in the mirror

Binkie The Clown

(7,911 posts)
15. I pinch myself and wake up. After all, it's got to be just a nightmare.
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 02:26 PM
Dec 2017

Or, since it's just a dream anyway, I fly straight up and far away from danger.

Floyd R. Turbo

(26,634 posts)
69. Might work! 👍🏻
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 04:56 PM
Dec 2017

Remember that guy that was in the next cubicle that you haven’t seen for awhile? 🧟?♂️

MuseRider

(34,133 posts)
42. A TV with muted Donald J. Trump
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 03:31 PM
Dec 2017

also known here as 2Scoops. That, even muted, should be enough. Turn it on and their heads would explode just like in Mars Attacks!

mahatmakanejeeves

(57,647 posts)
52. A pair of headphones. Cheap ones, too. Yikes.
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 03:58 PM
Dec 2017

I stood a better chance in the earlier version of this question, where we were asked to rely on the last TV character we had seen. I had just finished watching "Walker, Texas Ranger."

Laffy Kat

(16,388 posts)
54. My 50-pound catahoula doggo.
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 04:03 PM
Dec 2017

She's deaf so first I have to wake her up. Then she'll get right to work and lick that MF to death!

tymorial

(3,433 posts)
67. a tissue box, Chapstick, a glass of water and empty gum wrapper
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 04:50 PM
Dec 2017

I am pretty sure even McGuyver would be screwed.

Leith

(7,813 posts)
75. Stereo Headphones
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 07:28 PM
Dec 2017

and a box of Puffs.

What is with all the people with shower curtains and toilet paper next to them? Why are you posting from the toilet?

skylucy

(3,743 posts)
78. Guess I'd need to feed him my delicious roast beef sandwich and then hit him over the head with
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 07:37 PM
Dec 2017

the TV remote.

doc03

(35,386 posts)
88. Well I have a 40 cal. Springfield semi-auto loaded with 17 rounds in the night stand
Mon Dec 18, 2017, 08:42 PM
Dec 2017

on the left side of my bed. Shoot him in the head of course.

PJMcK

(22,054 posts)
101. My fiancee is sitting to my left
Tue Dec 19, 2017, 10:19 AM
Dec 2017

Hmm...

The fireplace poker is to my right, however.

I think I'll just click the back button.

Glorfindel

(9,739 posts)
103. A seven-piece manicure set in a "genuine leather made in Korea" case
Tue Dec 19, 2017, 10:26 AM
Dec 2017

I could offer to file its nails, I suppose....

 

Sailor65x1

(554 posts)
111. Reading glasses
Tue Dec 19, 2017, 10:56 AM
Dec 2017

Which I immediately hold up to the window. The focused sunlight burns the ceiling fan mount. The spinning fan falls to the coffee table. The blades strike the salad bowl I was eating from, launching its contents at the zombie. As we all know, zombies hate fruits and vegetables. As the zombie screams and frantically claws cucumber from its face, I escape safely out the front door.

CottonBear

(21,596 posts)
131. A large, velvet covered, feather filled throw pillow.
Tue Dec 19, 2017, 08:30 PM
Dec 2017

I shall smother the zombie after I clock it in the head with the glass bowl that I'm holding.

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