Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

jmowreader

(50,559 posts)
Tue Dec 19, 2017, 05:33 PM Dec 2017

Today's War on Christmas joke

Little Rotten Johnny, the worst kid in the world, asked his mother for paper and pencil to write a letter to Santa Claus.

"Little Rotten Johnny, you've been so bad this year Santa Claus doesn't want to hear from you. You need to write to the Baby Jesus."

Okay, thought LRJ, if that's what I gotta do...he sat down at the table and wrote, "Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of wonderful presents and I promise to be good all year long."

No. You can't lie to the Baby Jesus. So he threw that one away and started again:

"Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of wonderful presents and I promise to be good for a whole month."

No. Into the trash.

"Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of wonderful presents and I promise to be good for a whole week."

No. Into the trash.

By the time he managed to write a believable letter he knew the Baby Jesus wouldn't be interested in him being good for a whole millisecond and decided to take another approach to the subject. He dug around under the bed until he found a shoebox and some t-shirts. He went into the living room and got the Madonna from the nativity scene on the mantel. He carefully wrapped the figurine, put it in the box, and buried the box under all the stuff in his closet. Then he went back to the table and took pencil in hand...

"Dear Baby Jesus, if you ever want to see your mother again..."

1 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Today's War on Christmas joke (Original Post) jmowreader Dec 2017 OP
Twisted...but it made me laugh. The Wielding Truth Dec 2017 #1
Latest Discussions»The DU Lounge»Today's War on Christmas ...