And thanks for the hugs.

I don't miss him.

Withholding love, support, friendship, guidance, money.

We can learn from our mistakes and move forward. Fogging yourself only beats you down.

I was alone.

I also decided to write all my raging angry pain down in a journal that I would burn to symbolically burn the poison of the memories away. I gave myself six months. I wrote every single day and most of the time for hours at a time. I wrote of things I had carried with me from the time I was a child. And of my failed and miserable violent relationships. When the anger came back I wrote it again, and I cried and raged a lot doing it. I never re-read anything because it was all blackness of the soul and heart that I was getting rid of. There was nothing good in it to hold onto anymore.

It took me 2 years and many burnt journals to finally stop writing. It allowed me to make a life I wanted. It cured me of my own baggage. I found something good under all that foulness.

I really am my own best company and my best friend. But I had to dig to find me.

Maybe this doesn’t even make sense. I’ve been quite happily single since 1995 when I got divorced. Actually it’s been longer than that because I left my husband a few years before that.

I have no regrets at all.

I really am good company!

My relationships were not violent, but after two marriages I kind of decided I wasn't very good at it.

I don't make friends easily, and I don't commit like I probably should. Frankly, I am too selfish for that.