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Kali

(55,014 posts) Thu Nov 28, 2019, 12:02 PM Nov 2019

ok so it must just be me

I have been whining for years about not doing these stupid holiday meals. So much going on for us right now; moving an 82 year old family friend 250 miles last weekend, lost alcoholic/addict sibling going into hospice, kids doing a lot of their own things. The super tradition-bound son has gone to have dinner at the other son's new family place. I begged out to deal with the old family friend, who has let me off the hook so it is just the husband, me and possibly the third kid if she can get her vehicle across the wash (1.65 inches of rain since yesterday and still falling). She has plenty of other options so I'm not too worried about that, but I am still setting myself up for a whole day of cooking. Why?

12 replies

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ok so it must just be me (Original Post) Kali Nov 2019 OP

Maybe you could announce that this is the last year you're going to do the TGD dinner The Velveteen Ocelot Nov 2019 #1

LOL Kali Nov 2019 #3

In our family, Thanksgiving is the day when you get the most family together at one time. Arkansas Granny Nov 2019 #2

sounds wonderful Kali Nov 2019 #6

I find planning and making the holiday meal a kind of therapy Freddie Nov 2019 #4

yeah I kind of get that Kali Nov 2019 #7

I ask myself why, too. It's just me and pnwest Nov 2019 #5

good capture of the whole picture! Kali Nov 2019 #8

C'mon over. We're having ribs. I can smell them now. panader0 Nov 2019 #9

we WILL get together one of these days! Kali Nov 2019 #10

Just cook a chicken. zanana1 Nov 2019 #11

now I remember! Kali Nov 2019 #12

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,735 posts)

1. Maybe you could announce that this is the last year you're going to do the TGD dinner

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 12:10 PM

Nov 2019

and that other plans will have to be made for next year and the future. Sounds like it's time for your friends or relatives to be the host and you the guest.

Kali

(55,014 posts)

3. LOL

Reply to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #1)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 12:17 PM

Nov 2019

I have no credibility since I announce that every year

the fact that I am doing this even though the son that has been my past excuse is not here is a sign that it is really my own pathology, I think.

I was so close to going with to the other son's place but thought I might need to be around for the old friend who doesn't know anybody here yet, then last night he showed me the Marie Calendar turkey frozen dinner he was going to have while he continues getting his apartment in order, happy as a clam to be alone...I had a moment of real jealousy!

Arkansas Granny

(31,519 posts)

2. In our family, Thanksgiving is the day when you get the most family together at one time.

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 12:16 PM

Nov 2019

We're a family of cooks and just enjoy getting everyone in the kitchen and around the table.

Kali

(55,014 posts)

6. sounds wonderful

Reply to Arkansas Granny (Reply #2)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 04:09 PM

Nov 2019

wish I had the room for that, someday maybe...

Freddie

(9,267 posts)

4. I find planning and making the holiday meal a kind of therapy

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 12:31 PM

Nov 2019

Once in a while. And we get the house clean and straightened up for once and hope to keep it that way thru the holidays.

Kali

(55,014 posts)

7. yeah I kind of get that

Reply to Freddie (Reply #4)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 04:10 PM

Nov 2019

the satisfaction of pulling it off (again). my problem is never getting the house clean part.

pnwest

(3,266 posts)

5. I ask myself why, too. It's just me and

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 12:32 PM

Nov 2019

the Mr, and I get exhausted just THINKING about cooking the whole shittery. I fantasize about just a nice steak and baked potato dinner for once. But then I feel a deep lonely sadness. I think for me, more than any other ritual of the year, there’s something about cooking this meal, and these dishes, that makes me feel connected to the rest of the world. Feeling the presence of all the other women up at the crack of dawn, going through the same motions, performing the same rituals and tasks, carrying on their mothers’ and grandmothers’ traditions...somehow makes me feel connected to...something. I complain about it every year, discuss a shortened menu with the Mister every year, and end up making the whole shebang every year, cause it just doesn’t feel right not to.

Kali

(55,014 posts)

8. good capture of the whole picture!

Reply to pnwest (Reply #5)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 04:11 PM

Nov 2019

panader0

(25,816 posts)

9. C'mon over. We're having ribs. I can smell them now.

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 04:27 PM

Nov 2019

This rain has been something else. I think we've had more rain since the
monsoon than we did for the monsoon. I was able to fix two of my four roof
leaks before it hit. Pans out for the other two. Much more on the way
tonight and tomorrow. All the best Kali.

Kali

(55,014 posts)

10. we WILL get together one of these days!

Reply to panader0 (Reply #9)

Thu Nov 28, 2019, 04:45 PM

Nov 2019

ribs sound good! did all the main things and now enjoying some salted cashews and New Mexico Champagne while the turkey cooks. will take a leftover plate to my friend tomorrow.

we had 1.65 inches by 7 this morning and yeah, more on the way, but also wind - yuck.

zanana1

(6,122 posts)

11. Just cook a chicken.

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Fri Nov 29, 2019, 09:53 AM

Nov 2019

That's what I used to do when my husband was alive. It was just the two of us, so I stuffed the chicken. We had cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes and gravy. It was perfect.

Kali

(55,014 posts)

12. now I remember!

Reply to Kali (Original post)

Fri Nov 29, 2019, 03:07 PM

Nov 2019

the LEFTOVERS! DURRR....

after the electricity came back on it was time to heat up some leftovers. crazy wind, rain and now snow, electric started whacking out around 12:30 last night, finally seems to be back now. was on for a little while around 7, and quit mid flush (pressure pump for water)

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