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smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 01:36 AM Jul 2020

Today, well yesterday now, was my birthday.

Of course it's not much fun in lockdown, and I am not the wild party type, but I guess I am getting accostomed to birthdays that are pretty uneventful.

I had a lot of text, email and phone greetings, and a dear friend of mind sent me the most beautiful flower arrangement, a tower of sweets and is sending me a chromebook from her company. She is my biggest champion! Others have offered to take me out to dinner or lunch and sent cards and well wishes. My friends are so much kinder to me than my family.

However, I always find myself hurt by my family's lack of interest and I feel like I should be over this at this point in my life, but it is still kind of painful. My parents said they sent me a card which I haven't received, which will probably contain a check. I was with them and most of my family last weekend and they could not even bother to acknowledge my b-day knowing that they would not see me again for a while.

My brothers sent me text messages and my dear sister came through with an email gift card. I always send them cards and gift cards (unless I am with them in person and then I give them a physical gift). I actually love gift cards, but it just kind of still stings that they were all with me a week ago and couldn't be bothered to have a minor celebration after dinner or something.

I don't know why I am whining about this, but I guess I have always been disappointed by them and it's just kind of painful to realize how little they care.

Anyway, I apologize for the self-pity, but I am just kind of tired of being treated like a second-class citizen by them. BTW, most of them are hardcore Trump supporters/Republicans and they resent my political views, which may have something to do with it.

Bottom line, I am choosing to be grateful for the kindness I have recieved and am working on letting my attachment to them go. I am so appreciative of those who have come through for me and that is what I need to focus on instead of my family's indifference.

39 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Today, well yesterday now, was my birthday. (Original Post) smirkymonkey Jul 2020 OP
Happy Birthday! DonaldsRump Jul 2020 #1
Thank you! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #7
Many more and blessed may you have! 💖 sprinkleeninow Jul 2020 #2
Thanks so much sprinkleeninow! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #8
HAPPY BIRTHDAY sheshe2 Jul 2020 #3
Thank you sheshe2! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #9
That cake is making me hungry. sheshe2 Jul 2020 #12
Happy belated Birthday. cayugafalls Jul 2020 #4
Thanks cayugafalls! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #10
I think you did ask me that before and no I am not from there, just visited. cayugafalls Jul 2020 #13
Oh, sorry about that. smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #15
No sorries. I love both places. cayugafalls Jul 2020 #16
Beautiful! Just stunning! They are actually both quite similar looking. smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #18
Happy Birthday! yonder Jul 2020 #5
Just lovely! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #11
Happy birthday TEB Jul 2020 #6
Thank you, TEB! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #14
Awwww! Wishing you a most Happy Birthday, my friend! Rhiannon12866 Jul 2020 #17
Thank you, Rhiannon! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #19
Happy Birthday to You!! Alliepoo Jul 2020 #20
Thank you, Alliepoo! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #24
Happy Birthday and may you have many wonderful ones in the years ahead!! Fla Dem Jul 2020 #21
Thanks Fla Dem! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #25
Happy Birthday! The Velveteen Ocelot Jul 2020 #22
Thank you Velveteen! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #26
Happy, happy birthday! LuckyCharms Jul 2020 #23
Thank you, Lucky! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #27
Put yer headphones on... LuckyCharms Jul 2020 #30
Belated birthday wishes! Phentex Jul 2020 #28
Thank you, Phentex! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #29
Happy Birthday, my sweet DU friend! Totally Tunsie Jul 2020 #31
Thank you, Tunsie! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #32
Happy Belated Birthday, SM!! Niagara Jul 2020 #33
Thank you, Niagara! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #34
You're welcome, SM! Niagara Jul 2020 #35
Happy Birthday! Aristus Jul 2020 #36
Thanks, Aristus! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #38
Happy belated Birthday! nt tblue37 Jul 2020 #37
Thanks, tblue! smirkymonkey Jul 2020 #39

cayugafalls

(5,645 posts)
4. Happy belated Birthday.
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 01:52 AM
Jul 2020


I think you are quite blessed. Your friends sound really caring and it sounds like you will have plenty of make up lunches and dinners to go to once you feel like it.

It always hurts when family treats you poorly, so I can sympathize with you on that point as well as the republican family members deal.

I am glad you chose to focus on the good and not the bad. Have a great day!

And party on...
 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
10. Thanks cayugafalls!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 03:06 AM
Jul 2020

You are right. I am trying to focus on the good in my life, and there is a lot of it.

I suppose I am dealing with a bit of a family induced emotional hangover from last weekend, but I will snap out of it.

Are you from the NY Cayuga Falls? They are very beautiful! Did I ask you this already? It's kind of late and I'm a bit sleepy, so I don't remember.

cayugafalls

(5,645 posts)
13. I think you did ask me that before and no I am not from there, just visited.
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 03:18 AM
Jul 2020

I'm from Ohio originally, grew up on the Cuyahoga River near the Falls there.

So kind of a play and twist on two places I love for my name.

 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
15. Oh, sorry about that.
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 03:52 AM
Jul 2020

I think I am missing my upstate NY origins. It's so beautiful up there. Here is what Cayuga Falls looks like there.







Anyway, it's a beautiful area, as is much of upstate NY. I just think it's one of the most naturally beautiful areas in the world, but of course, I am biased. I am sure where you are from is very beautiful as well.

cayugafalls

(5,645 posts)
16. No sorries. I love both places.
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 04:16 AM
Jul 2020

I think you got us on beauty, I love their beauty. I used to hike a lot on vacations and I agree upstate NY is beautiful.

Here are some pics of what remains of Cuyahoga Falls today as the building of the dams destroyed the big falls.

Brandywine Falls


Remnants of the Big Falls...


The gorge


The Little Falls

 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
18. Beautiful! Just stunning! They are actually both quite similar looking.
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 07:39 AM
Jul 2020

I have done quite a bit of traveling, but I must say some of the most beautiful places I have ever seen are right here in our own backyards.

We really live in a country that is rich in natural beauty. It is a shame that we are being governed by someone who only shows the world our ugliest side.

Thank you for sharing, cayugafalls! Nice chatting with you!

yonder

(9,679 posts)
5. Happy Birthday!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 02:56 AM
Jul 2020

Not great quality, but for some cheer, here's a photo of Penstemon (wilcoxii, I think) and some Cinquefoil trying to sneak in.

 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
14. Thank you, TEB!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 03:31 AM
Jul 2020

Hope all is going well with you and your new little pupper! And of course Boog and the other babies! They are all so adorable!

Rhiannon12866

(206,247 posts)
17. Awwww! Wishing you a most Happy Birthday, my friend!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 04:56 AM
Jul 2020

And I know, it's tough for me, too, remembering birthdays I spent as a kid with my extended family. Hang in there and know that your DU family is here for you!



 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
19. Thank you, Rhiannon!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 07:42 AM
Jul 2020

Good to hear from you! Such a kind message! You all make up for my family!

I haven't been in the video forum much since it's summer and everyone is on vacation, but I always appreciate your posts. I hope all is going well with you!

Alliepoo

(2,228 posts)
20. Happy Birthday to You!!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 08:07 AM
Jul 2020

And many more!! I wish your first fam wasnt so unthinking but it sounds like you’ve got another kind of family of your choosing that love you to pieces!!!! And your DU family loves you, too!! Wishing you the very best and every happiness!!

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,887 posts)
22. Happy Birthday!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 11:49 AM
Jul 2020

You can't choose your family, so sometimes it's your friends who really make the difference, since after all, they chose you.

LuckyCharms

(17,460 posts)
23. Happy, happy birthday!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 12:36 PM
Jul 2020

If not for the pandemic, i would bake you a cake and we could smoke some weed and I'd play some killer tunes for you!

I'd then entertain you with my so called "humor"!

 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
27. Thank you, Lucky!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 12:54 PM
Jul 2020

Smoke some weed anyway, and play some killer tunes for yourself!

You ALWAYS entertain me with your humor! Keep it coming!

Phentex

(16,334 posts)
28. Belated birthday wishes!
Tue Jul 14, 2020, 12:55 PM
Jul 2020

People have already posted the things I would have said to you.

But I can empathize with feeling not as important to some people and it really hurts. I feel more vulnerable than I ever have in my life and when people can't be bothered to extend the smallest of courtesies, it hurts.

DU is family!

Niagara

(7,683 posts)
33. Happy Belated Birthday, SM!!
Wed Jul 15, 2020, 11:30 AM
Jul 2020

I'm sorry that I'm so late in wishing you a Happy Birthday.


I'm happy to hear that your friends remembered your birthday and always try to remember, family isn't always blood relation.



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