(AUBURN, MI) Reporters getting an exclusive look through the newly developed “Alternate Universe Window” created by Dow Corning Labs today have reported that it in every universe surveyed, Donald Trump seems to be an insufferable, narcissistic douchebag — just as in our own reality.

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“At this point we don’t know how or why the window ‘selects’ which parts of other universes to display,” one scientist at Dow stated, “But for some reason, it has shown us a lot of Donald Trump in each universe we’ve been able to view, and the guy is always a total douche.”

In particular, the window seems to have settled on one alternative world in which Donald Trump — far from being a billionaire — is an abrasive homeless man, whose ranting and raving goes largely unnoticed but for the other homeless people living in his immediate vicinity. Those unfortunate souls seem mildly annoyed by the ranting Trump but take little mind of the man and do their best to steer clear.

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Alternate Trump Hawks Stolen Malt Liquor Under His Own “Classy” Re-Brand

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“The substantial sameness of the various Trumps is fascinating,”