Really Auraria? Really? My campus is a little weird:

"Officer responded to the Arts Building on a suspicious activity. The Reporting Party (RP) reported that a custodian was caught on video of lying on a couch picking their nose. AHEC Custodian Supervisor will review AHEC policies with the custodian."

This would be in violation of the gold digging in public clause in their contract.

Or as I would like to say, sometimes there is gold in them thar nostrils.