Strange dream I had last night

Keep in mind that I fell asleep last night with The Science Channel on, and that sometimes what's on the TV influences my dreaming.

In my dream, my friend and I were delivering pizzas.

One of our deliveries was at a country club.

We're walking past a room where a bunch of old men are playing cards.

This big, old guy, with no shirt, and a bunch of gold chains is smoking a cigar, and spewing stuff that (in my dream) I recognized as being stuff Rush Limbaugh said.

According to the old, topless guy (and Limbaugh) Obamacare was paying to give Viagra to comatose transgender people, because their families were convinced they'd die if they didn't have a constant erection.

I put down my pizza, walked into the room, and called the dude out for his ignorance and bigotry. I made one of those awesome speeches that only happen in dreams, but you can never remember them.

There was some laughter and some scattered applause.

And then the old dude stood up and came at me.

He was like a foot taller than me, and stood over me, pushing on my shoulders and yelling at me.

I told my friend to call 911, and kept telling the man, "Take your hands off me. You're hurting me."

After repeated warnings, I finally shoved the heel of my hand up at the guy's chin.

And that is when I woke-up, because I had just almost slapped my wife in the face.